Man Chooses to Swap Disabled Hand for Bionic Replacement

[Android2137]

It just goes to show what science is capable of when we really knuckle down.

I agree. Science sure is handy. I give those doctors the thumbs up! I just wish I had a grasp on how it all works.

Truly we are living in the digital age.

Oh snap, I missed that one! You really nailed me.
*facepalm*
You'll have to give me a helping hand next time.

I have to say I don't find your request opposable

I'm clutching at straws here. I guess I must be losing my touch.
Maybe you could point me in the right direction?

I...erm...hands...

Yeah, that'll do...

I applaud your effort sir.

Well I gotta hand it to him. He made a good effort. Too bad it was too touch and go! Though I can't say I'm much better. I've been trying to figure out how to make a pun out of "carpal", but I can't handle it.

Certainly was some fine handiwork on his part. Though I don't think it has the same punch as your own.
I'll help him out though. Pinky promise.

One just needs a touch of creativity. In this day and age, meta humor seems to be popular. (Get it? Meta? Metacarpal? No? All right then...)

Either way though, bionic advancement is good news. Maybe someday, I can become a real cyborg and it'll be awesome! Though I might have to get into an accident first... That won't be so fun...

 

[Roboto]

I think that all these puns might be making me mad, but I just can't put my finger on it.

 

[Canadish]

It just goes to show what science is capable of when we really knuckle down.

I agree. Science sure is handy. I give those doctors the thumbs up! I just wish I had a grasp on how it all works.

Truly we are living in the digital age.

Oh snap, I missed that one! You really nailed me.
*facepalm*
You'll have to give me a helping hand next time.

I have to say I don't find your request opposable

I'm clutching at straws here. I guess I must be losing my touch.
Maybe you could point me in the right direction?

I...erm...hands...

Yeah, that'll do...

I applaud your effort sir.

Well I gotta hand it to him. He made a good effort. Too bad it was too touch and go! Though I can't say I'm much better. I've been trying to figure out how to make a pun out of "carpal", but I can't handle it.

Certainly was some fine handiwork on his part. Though I don't think it has the same punch as your own.
I'll help him out though. Pinky promise.

One just needs a touch of creativity. In this day and age, meta humor seems to be popular. (Get it? Meta? Metacarpal? No? All right then...)

Either way though, bionic advancement is good news. Maybe someday, I can become a real cyborg and it'll be awesome! Though I might have to get into an accident first... That won't be so fun...

People do certainly seem enjoy poking fun. I slap my sides laughing sometimes.

Though I wouldn't get in to much of a hurry to throw yourself under a bus, if you don't have the cash, the hospital might just give you the finger

 

[Funkysandwich]

It just goes to show what science is capable of when we really knuckle down.

I agree. Science sure is handy. I give those doctors the thumbs up! I just wish I had a grasp on how it all works.

Truly we are living in the digital age.

Oh snap, I missed that one! You really nailed me.
*facepalm*
You'll have to give me a helping hand next time.

I have to say I don't find your request opposable

I'm clutching at straws here. I guess I must be losing my touch.
Maybe you could point me in the right direction?

I don't know, you seem to have a good grasp on the concept, but any more and the gloves are coming off!

I'm sure he could take you single-handed.

 

[Canadish]

It just goes to show what science is capable of when we really knuckle down.

I agree. Science sure is handy. I give those doctors the thumbs up! I just wish I had a grasp on how it all works.

Truly we are living in the digital age.

Oh snap, I missed that one! You really nailed me.
*facepalm*
You'll have to give me a helping hand next time.

I have to say I don't find your request opposable

I'm clutching at straws here. I guess I must be losing my touch.
Maybe you could point me in the right direction?

I don't know, you seem to have a good grasp on the concept, but any more and the gloves are coming off!

And the gauntlet is thrown.
I warn ye, we're already snatching each others puns here.

 

[The Random One]

I'm reminded of the creepy Deus Ex Sarif Industries trailers...

Spoiler

Yeah, these came out on the same day, right? (I mean, the videos were published the same day as news of the bionic hand.) That's quite creepy.

 

[Kopikatsu]

Wait, people bitched about this? The guy wants it done, the surgeon is totally fine with it, and it's doing nothing but helping Milo.

Why would you ***** about something like that?

 

[emeraldrafael]

...

I'm sorry, maybe I missed the importance of this, why is this different from any one getting prosthetic implants?

I mean, its a great story, it really is. he's getting a second chance at life, which is good and all, but... it just doesnt seem that special when I have six people living on my block with Prosthetic Implants (A lot of old coal miners and steel works live on my block).

EDIT:

Wait, people bitched about this? The guy wants it done, the surgeon is totally fine with it, and it's doing nothing but helping Milo.

Why would you ***** about something like that?

Some people beleive that everyone should stay natural. no tattoos and such.

and some people are probably just scared. or think it will hurt him if soemthign goes wrong (cause even today, an implant isnt that perfect science we saw in Star wars.

 

[LCP]

Can i get a flamethrower attachment?

 

[PureIrony]

This is quite the interesting advancement.

Now lets just hope no one tries to replace their arm with a prosthetic made out of their wife.

Or a mech suit made out of your mom.

Took me a minute to get the Evangelion reference. I thought you were insulting me.

Why would any scifi writers think that constructing any technology out of a human is a clever idea?

It's just gross and stupid. DX

Its actually worse than that. Evangelions aren't made from humans; they're essentially a very soft-science version of clones which have human souls implanted in them.

And they're next anime had robots/phallic imagery crawling out of a hyperspace portal in a 12 years old's skull. Always so lovably crazy, that Studio Gainax.

 

[Canadish]

It just goes to show what science is capable of when we really knuckle down.

I agree. Science sure is handy. I give those doctors the thumbs up! I just wish I had a grasp on how it all works.

Truly we are living in the digital age.

Oh snap, I missed that one! You really nailed me.
*facepalm*
You'll have to give me a helping hand next time.

I have to say I don't find your request opposable

I'm clutching at straws here. I guess I must be losing my touch.
Maybe you could point me in the right direction?

I don't know, you seem to have a good grasp on the concept, but any more and the gloves are coming off!

And the gauntlet is thrown.
I warn ye, we're already snatching each others puns here.

I'm sure he could take you single-handed.

I'm pretty sure I could beat him when it comes to fisticuffs: I've got quite a reach.

But I have the flexibility.
Now, maybe we pull our punchs. After all, derailing a thread is a heavy risk...

 

[Alphalpha]

This is so cool, and not just a guy regaining use of his hand! I'd totally get one of those, but I have full use of my hands. Seriously, how is bionic augmentation not the most awesome thing we could do with our bodies? Somebody please invent bionic eyes...I'm kinda sick of having to wear glasses and only being able to see between ~450-750nm.

That's what laser eye surgery is for.

About $3000 per eye, and it won't do anything about that limited range. I want to see in the IR-UV range, damnit!

Whatever, man. Once the inevitable EMP terrorist apocalyptic strike shuts down North America I'll be sitting pretty with my 20/20 vision while you're stumbling around blind.

This amuses me.

 

[Doctor Glocktor]

If only he has a bionic arm.

 

[thethingthatlurks]

This is so cool, and not just a guy regaining use of his hand! I'd totally get one of those, but I have full use of my hands. Seriously, how is bionic augmentation not the most awesome thing we could do with our bodies? Somebody please invent bionic eyes...I'm kinda sick of having to wear glasses and only being able to see between ~450-750nm.

That's what laser eye surgery is for.

About $3000 per eye, and it won't do anything about that limited range. I want to see in the IR-UV range, damnit!

Whatever, man. Once the inevitable EMP terrorist apocalyptic strike shuts down North America I'll be sitting pretty with my 20/20 vision while you're stumbling around blind.

This amuses me.

I'm pretty sure you'd die in that attack, along with everybody else in the blast radius who happens to be exposed to the atmosphere. Sooo...let's assume we both live. I get to have my awesome vision, and you...get to be food? idk, what would you inferior unaugmented humans do in the post-apocalyptic world? Aside from, you know, being hunted for sport...

 

[PrinceofPersia]

I'm pretty sure you'd die in that attack, along with everybody else in the blast radius who happens to be exposed to the atmosphere. Sooo...let's assume we both live. I get to have my awesome vision, and you...get to be food? idk, what would you inferior unaugmented humans do in the post-apocalyptic world? Aside from, you know, being hunted for sport...

And therein lies the problem with augmentation, whether mechanical or genetic. It gives you an false feeling of superiority.

 

[thethingthatlurks]

I'm pretty sure you'd die in that attack, along with everybody else in the blast radius who happens to be exposed to the atmosphere. Sooo...let's assume we both live. I get to have my awesome vision, and you...get to be food? idk, what would you inferior unaugmented humans do in the post-apocalyptic world? Aside from, you know, being hunted for sport...

And therein lies the problem with augmentation, whether mechanical or genetic. It gives you an incorrect feeling of superiority.

Silence, future food! The stress from arguing on the internet will make you tough and generally undelectable. And don't forget to baste yourself every hour

On a completely unrelated side note, where the hell did I put that oil? My left arm is starting to creak...

 

[fulano]

I'm reminded of the creepy Deus Ex Sarif Industries trailers...

Fuck yeah.

Screw the guys whining about him cutting his hand to get a prostheses. He's entitled to do whatever he wants with his body.

 

[commodore96]

I had a skiing accident that destroyed my right shoulder and I would replace that shoulder in a second with a bionic one if I had the chance.

 

[Kopikatsu]

This is so cool, and not just a guy regaining use of his hand! I'd totally get one of those, but I have full use of my hands. Seriously, how is bionic augmentation not the most awesome thing we could do with our bodies? Somebody please invent bionic eyes...I'm kinda sick of having to wear glasses and only being able to see between ~450-750nm.

That's what laser eye surgery is for.

About $3000 per eye, and it won't do anything about that limited range. I want to see in the IR-UV range, damnit!

Whatever, man. Once the inevitable EMP terrorist apocalyptic strike shuts down North America I'll be sitting pretty with my 20/20 vision while you're stumbling around blind.

This amuses me.

I'm pretty sure you'd die in that attack, along with everybody else in the blast radius who happens to be exposed to the atmosphere. Sooo...let's assume we both live. I get to have my awesome vision, and you...get to be food? idk, what would you inferior unaugmented humans do in the post-apocalyptic world? Aside from, you know, being hunted for sport...

The Monster Girl Encyclopedia happens. Google it.

Unless you're at work or near your family. In that case, don't.

 

[EHKOS]

Now just install some tools and wireless chips to activate things around the house and you have a deal for Mr. Left. Senor Righty stays with me though.