Maths and Science Jokes!

[crimson5pheonix]

The nobles seem to think that the combustible alkali situation can be held in check by the Electronegative Inquisition, but who can say?

Is it just me, or is this starting to sound like a high-brow academic Abbott and Costello routine?

Edit: My bad, Bud.

Not at all. You say that like there's a low brow Abbot and Costello routine.

 

[xitel]

The limit as x approaches YOUR MOM!


Hey, I didn't say it was good.

 

[crimson5pheonix]

The limit as x approaches YOUR MOM!


Hey, I didn't say it was good.

Great job, you single handedly killed the thread, I hope your proud

 

[xitel]

The limit as x approaches YOUR MOM!


Hey, I didn't say it was good.

Great job, you single handedly killed the thread, I hope your proud

Says the guy who's been having an Abbott and Costello back-and-forth. By the way, which element's on first?

 

[crimson5pheonix]

The limit as x approaches YOUR MOM!


Hey, I didn't say it was good.

Great job, you single handedly killed the thread, I hope your proud

Says the guy who's been having an Abbott and Costello back-and-forth. By the way, which element's on first?

Why lady Hydrogen of the lake of course, she does have an atomic number of 1 so it's only logical.

 

[xitel]

The limit as x approaches YOUR MOM!


Hey, I didn't say it was good.

Great job, you single handedly killed the thread, I hope your proud

Says the guy who's been having an Abbott and Costello back-and-forth. By the way, which element's on first?

Why lady Hydrogen of the lake of course, she does have an atomic number of 1 so it's only logical.

Wait, so who's on first?

 

[crimson5pheonix]

The limit as x approaches YOUR MOM!


Hey, I didn't say it was good.

Great job, you single handedly killed the thread, I hope your proud

Says the guy who's been having an Abbott and Costello back-and-forth. By the way, which element's on first?

Why lady Hydrogen of the lake of course, she does have an atomic number of 1 so it's only logical.

Wait, so who's on first?

Listen damnit! I said Lady Hydrogen and I mean it!

 

[xitel]

The limit as x approaches YOUR MOM!


Hey, I didn't say it was good.

Great job, you single handedly killed the thread, I hope your proud

Says the guy who's been having an Abbott and Costello back-and-forth. By the way, which element's on first?

Why lady Hydrogen of the lake of course, she does have an atomic number of 1 so it's only logical.

Wait, so who's on first?

Listen damnit! I said Lady Hydrogen and I mean it!

So what's on second?

 

[nimrandir]

The limit as x approaches YOUR MOM!


Hey, I didn't say it was good.

The limit operator needs an operand, though. Try something like 'the limit of tan(x) as x approaches your mom is skin cancer' or something.

 

[crimson5pheonix]

The limit as x approaches YOUR MOM!


Hey, I didn't say it was good.

Great job, you single handedly killed the thread, I hope your proud

Says the guy who's been having an Abbott and Costello back-and-forth. By the way, which element's on first?

Why lady Hydrogen of the lake of course, she does have an atomic number of 1 so it's only logical.

Wait, so who's on first?

Listen damnit! I said Lady Hydrogen and I mean it!

So what's on second?

King Helium, now pay attention to the naming scheme and I won't have to tell you.

 

[crimson5pheonix]

The limit as x approaches YOUR MOM!


Hey, I didn't say it was good.

The limit operator needs an operand, though. Try something like 'the limit of tan(x) as x approaches your mom is skin cancer' or something.

I didn't realize I could find a joke so nerdy that I would be offended by just how nerdy it is. This is an accomplishment, you deserve a badge for that.

 

[xitel]

The limit as x approaches YOUR MOM!


Hey, I didn't say it was good.

The limit operator needs an operand, though. Try something like 'the limit of tan(x) as x approaches your mom is skin cancer' or something.

Dude, it's not supposed to make sense. I was quoting a guy from my math class. He shouted it during a review.

The limit as x approaches YOUR MOM!


Hey, I didn't say it was good.

Great job, you single handedly killed the thread, I hope your proud

Says the guy who's been having an Abbott and Costello back-and-forth. By the way, which element's on first?

Why lady Hydrogen of the lake of course, she does have an atomic number of 1 so it's only logical.

Wait, so who's on first?

Listen damnit! I said Lady Hydrogen and I mean it!

So what's on second?

King Helium, now pay attention to the naming scheme and I won't have to tell you.

And noones on third?

 

[crimson5pheonix]

The limit as x approaches YOUR MOM!


Hey, I didn't say it was good.

The limit operator needs an operand, though. Try something like 'the limit of tan(x) as x approaches your mom is skin cancer' or something.

Dude, it's not supposed to make sense. I was quoting a guy from my math class. He shouted it during a review.

The limit as x approaches YOUR MOM!


Hey, I didn't say it was good.

Great job, you single handedly killed the thread, I hope your proud

Says the guy who's been having an Abbott and Costello back-and-forth. By the way, which element's on first?

Why lady Hydrogen of the lake of course, she does have an atomic number of 1 so it's only logical.

Wait, so who's on first?

Listen damnit! I said Lady Hydrogen and I mean it!

So what's on second?

King Helium, now pay attention to the naming scheme and I won't have to tell you.

And noones on third?

*sigh* Third is junior alchemist Lithium.

 

[xitel]

snip

*sigh* Third is junior alchemist Lithium.

Ummm... crap I forgot the shortstop...

 

[crimson5pheonix]

snip

*sigh* Third is junior alchemist Lithium.

Ummm... crap I forgot the shortstop...

Great job.

 

[Radelaide]

My favorite math joke doesn't work as text, time to scour Google Images for a picture of it...

After a tedious 10 second search, I found it:

Spoiler: Click For Picture

You used the one I was gunna use! I'm getting that tee shirt! kudos!!

EDIT:

Spoiler: Poor Johnny

 

[mkb07a]

My favorite math joke doesn't work as text, time to scour Google Images for a picture of it...

After a tedious 10 second search, I found it:

Spoiler: Click For Picture

You used the one I was gunna use! I'm getting that tee shirt! kudos!!

EDIT:

Spoiler: Poor Johnny

Damn! Damn! I was about to post that same poem!

Oh well. Lemme see if I can find the other one... Ah. Okay. It's not a joke but it IS hilarious.

Spoiler: Damnit, Carol!

 

[Twilight_guy]

Sorry if someone already used these, but I'm too lazy to read every post first before I post.

"My father was a chemist,
He is a chemist no more.
For what he thought was h2o
was really h2so4."

Alcohol and calculus don't mix. Don't drink and derive.

"There once was a young lady named bright,
Who traveled much faster then light.
She left one day,
in a relative way,
and returned on the previous night."

 

[Mr Jack]

http://greggsutter.com/mt/archives/manWomanControlPanel.jpg

Always liked this one.

 

[mairsil]

that is also a pice of flavour tekst from magic the gathering.

I can't remember wich one, sadly enough