Microsoft Applied to Patent TV Achievements

[Frezzato]

Spoiler: Sarcasm loading...

"...In other words, if a person were to watch a certain program or series of videos, the system in question could track that and reward the viewer for doing so."

I'm sure that, if implemented, people will still cheat the system by leaving their units and TVs on. That would probably lead to Microsoft quietly updating their Xbone Kinect software to track the eyes and heartbeats of customers to make sure they're in the same room, watching the TV screen.
[hr]
Hell, I've been waiting for years for stuff like DVD players and toasters that required webcams in order to work. Even better if it has 1080p resolution and phoned home every 24 hours. It's about damn time!

No, I'm just being paranoid. Having your picture taken without explicit permission? That will never happen of course [http://www.dancecentral.com/forums/showthread.php?t=118&pagenumber]. And the always-on Kinect will never get hacked. How could it? It's not as if Microsoft rushes the design and construction of their own hardware [http://www.ign.com/articles/2008/02/26/new-info-on-360-death-rate-study]. Their stuff is all solidly planned out [http://www.zdnet.com/blog/btl/the-top-five-reasons-why-windows-vista-failed/10303], and their products are extremely secure [http://www.tomshardware.com/news/AV-TEST-Certification-Security-Essentials-Double-Failure-0-Day,20524.html]. And the fears about games requiring internet connections are overblown. Years from now, Microsoft will support their hardware [http://www.engadget.com/2011/03/14/microsoft-reportedly-kills-off-zune-hardware-will-focus-on-soft/]. They wouldn't abandon their customers [http://www.wired.com/gadgetlab/2010/06/four-reasons-why-microsofts-kin-phone-failed/]. And, while they might openly consider selling your very personal data [http://www.engadget.com/2010/11/15/microsoft-exec-caught-in-privacy-snafu-says-kinect-might-tailor/], and maybe even apply for patents for the sale of such data [http://www.engadget.com/2007/07/31/microsoft-envisions-invasive-approach-to-targeted-advertising/], they probably promise to never, ever do that. Microsoft cares about our concerns [http://news.yahoo.com/microsoft-exec-resigns-telling-users-deal-regarding-always-200558619.html].

And even if they don't really care, they can just hide it in the EULA [http://www.techspot.com/news/48784-updated-microsoft-eula-prohibits-class-action-lawsuits.html].

[hr]

Blink once if you accept the terms of use for Xbox One with mandatory Kinect.


Thank you.

 

[tehroc]

What's next it won't be able to play DVD/Blueray Movies without registering them with MPAA?

 

[dessertmonkeyjk]

Okay then Microsoft... let's see how you like your Kinect covered by a very thick cloth. If I want to use it, I'll do it when "I" choose to do so.

 

[Sixcess]

Okay then Microsoft... let's see how you like your Kinect covered by a very thick cloth. If I want to use it, I'll do it when "I" choose to do so.

Achievement Unlocked: Hey, who turned out the lights?

 

[Roander]

Okay then Microsoft... let's see how you like your Kinect covered by a very thick cloth. If I want to use it, I'll do it when "I" choose to do so.

Achievement Unlocked: Hey, who turned out the lights?

Achievement Unlocked: I can't let you do that, Dave. -- activate the Kinect's "self defense" protocols by preventing it from spying on you.

 

[deadish]

Not to troll, my only response is,

"..."

Microsoft is getting more bizarre everyday.

 

[Evil Smurf]

This seems like a fun idea. And I have a few more achievements:

Treason
Plug in a previous generation to your tv

come on ref!
watch sports and get angry.

 

[badgersprite]

Oh my God.

This is the funniest thing I've read all day.

 

[Sir Pootis]

I don't care what anyone says, there is no way you can go for these achievements and not look pathetic. And if Microsoft gives achievements for advertisements, then I think it's safe to say that Microsoft are all idiots.

On a related note, who votes we move all discussion of the Xbone from the Gaming Discussion to Off-topic Discussion forums?

 

[Zanderinfal]

Christ above, Microsoft must be WANTING us to not give them our money. Jesus, how far will these greedy sods go? TV Achievements, no used games, a semi-always on DRM system, no backwards compatibility and more...

It's official, Microsoft is putting a bullet in the back of their own head at this point.

 

[TheSteeleStrap]

You mean it can see what I watch and suggest similar programming! Wow, if only someone had thought of this sooner. /sarcasm

 

[My name is Fiction]

I can see it now:

New achievement unlocked "Incest is the best" watch the Cersai and Jamie Lannister sex scene six times in a row.

Its WINcest! X D

 

[MeChaNiZ3D]

It's just like achievements already, except without the possibility of some of them requiring effort. Most nowadays are watch a cutscene, reach the next chapter, collect all the things, which translates nicely into watching whole episodes, watching whole series, and watching shows one after the other. Although it would be funny if the Kinect could pick up laughter and give you a subtle "Got the reference" achievement.

 

[Bullfrog1983]

Wow, so now you can sit and watch TV and fell like you've accomplished something. This is a disgusting idea.

I couldn't stop laughing, but I kind of feel the same way about 'achievements' in games.

 

[synobal]

I can see it now:

New achievement unlocked "Incest is the best" watch the Cersai and Jamie Lannister sex scene six times in a row.

Its WINcest! X D

Please don't bring supernatural slashfiction into this.

 

[My name is Fiction]

I can see it now:

New achievement unlocked "Incest is the best" watch the Cersai and Jamie Lannister sex scene six times in a row.

Its WINcest! X D

Please don't bring supernatural slashfiction into this.

I know nothing about supernatural.

 

[scorptatious]

My brother theorizes that the Xbox One (or Xbone if you will) is a dummy system so they can announce a better console in comparison at E3. With this I'm starting to think he might be on to something.

If that is the case, Microsoft are the biggest bunch of trolls in gaming history.

OT: So now they intend to control what people watch using achievements. Great. Microsoft, you're just digging farther and farther down.

 

[scorptatious]

I don't care what anyone says, there is no way you can go for these achievements and not look pathetic. And if Microsoft gives achievements for advertisements, then I think it's safe to say that Microsoft are all idiots.

On a related note, who votes we move all discussion of the Xbone from the Gaming Discussion to Off-topic Discussion forums?

I wouldn't mind that. We can get back to talking about the games that we love instead of the console we despise.

 

[CyberMachinist]

I got some achievements to add to the growing pile.

Achievement Unlocked: kinnect-ing the dots - 100G
-Watch 10 ads about the Xbox one.
Achievement Unlocked: Your Reality - 50G
-watch 5 different reality tv shows.
Achievement Unlocked: Electric Avenue - 250G
-Watch 50 ads relating to electronics.
Achievement Unlocked: MicroSlave - 1000G
-Buy more Xbox one's.

 

[SilverBullets000]

Achievement- Size counts
You are now wider then your HDTV screen.

This is gold. Actually, all the joke acheivments in this thread are hilarious, but this one was the one that opened the floodgate. You also have Mable as an icon. I congratulate you for both those things.

I may have to invest in a sex doll or CPR dummy to trick the Kinect into thinking I actually watch all their crap

Considering that it can tell what your face looks like, read your heart beat, see in the dark via heat-scanning, and listen for your voice in a room full of people; I doubt that would work...but-
Achievment Unlocked-Hello Baby-5G
Introduce the Kinect to one of your "special" buddies.