Poll: No tolerance zone for bitching

[Erana]

Another thing was that she upset me at a bad time. I had a heated argument with my English teacher that morning about how her grading methods are unfair and stupid (as far as I'm concerned, they're retarded), and since I felt wronged, I was more or less discontent and irritable the entire day. It's possible that I might not have reacted in such a manner to that girl's quips if I was in a better mood that day, but like I said, I've been meaning to kick someone out of my car for complaining.

On the other hand, her losing her job would be quite the lesson in appreciation and gratitude. Just sayin'.

So, you were already upset, and then you antagonize the next person to upset you?
And now you go and make a thread on a forum trying to get people to justify what you've done?

What you have here is a guilty conscience.

Yes, it is rude for her to have pointed out the flaws of your car, but its just as rude to take out your frustration with your English teacher and other life problems on this girl.
At least, that's how you feel deep down, or you wouldn't have made this thread. People don't just make threads like this unless they want approval for their actions, and you yourself have voiced doubt on the matter.

You should suck up your pride and go explain what had happened that day, that what she said about your car upset you, and give a good, sincere apology.
Even if she is the biggest jerk in the world and responds terribly, you can then walk away from this matter with a clean conscience.
Though you should probably try to look for more pleasant people to hang out with in the future if this kinda thing keeps happening.


To put it out there, I did something in the same vein today. This morning, I managed to get an appointment for meeting my potential future neurosurgeon. And then my class went from 8:30 to 2:00 without a lunch break. So, I'm upset by people poking around in my head and am hungry as Hell. I'm not the nice Erana right now.
Then, after class, I was trying to ask a professor if we were going to continue painting small paintings through the semester, when another student interjected with, "Small isn't bad," and went on to talk about his experience making works the size of postage stamps.
I responded by saying in a frank tone, "I'm not here for your input," and walking away.
It bothered me for a few hours, in which I was trying to justify my reaction by insisting that he was looking to argue with me by implying that I was trying to argue for large works of art and presenting an argument against it.
I called my mother up and told her that this has been bothering me, and she pointed it out, plain and simple: he was just trying to strike up a conversation with me, and I completely shut him down. And he seemed like a socially awkward guy, so being argumentative in conversation may be the only way he knows how to chat.

I resolved to apologize and while I'm prolly not going to see him 'til next week, I feel better about it already.

 

[Dr. Pepper Unlimited]

Too cruel?

Nope. People use to ***** because I park a mile from any other vehicle. Well, I just bought a new car less than two years ago and I don't want door dents because nobody knows how to fucking park. Seriously...people...learn to park and open your door without hitting my car. So, I park waaaaay the hell out there and they complain about walking. Well, they don't want to walk, then don't get in my car.

So...too cruel? Not at all. Kick her out.

 

[fozzy360]

Anyway, she ticked me off when she started bitching about how I didn't have a decent stereo and bass in the car, and her snide remark about the car's air conditioner being messed up was the last straw. I was a little pissed, but I kept my cool and didn't say shit. As soon as we came to the next stop light, I reached across her lap, unlocked the passenger door, pushed it open, and told her to get the fuck out.

Never said this before, but you are now a fucking hero of mine.

Thank you for ending my day with a smile.

 

[manic_depressive13]

Yeah, that's pretty extreme. So you have a shit car, and she observed as much. My brother always makes jokes about how shit his car is and he likes to laugh about it. This girl probably thought she was being playful. However, if I am to give you the benefit of the doubt and say that she was deliberately being snide and offensive, you could at least have given some indication that you are an overly sensitive child first, so she could have a chance to modify her behaviour.

While it depends a bit on how far you were from your destination, your actions were just rude and uncalled for. I mean, she "disrespected" your car? Really? You need to get the fuck over yourself.

She disrespected him, multiple times, as he was going out of his way to do her a favor. Definitely not being an "overly sensitive child", he was being a gentleman until she made it clear that she was an inconsiderate *****.

Actions justified.
Carry on sir.

She didn't disrespect him. She just said he has a shit car. Her comments were at best an attempt at joking around, and at worst an attempt to convince him to save up for a new car because he's missing out on things like air conditioning and decent sound quality. The OP keeps mentioning that she thought she deserved a luxury car or something, but he never actually quotes her claiming to be embarrassed by the car. She was just pointing out that it might be time to replace it. Big deal.

In fact, I hope she did say something to the effect that she was embarrassed by the car, otherwise the assumption that she was complaining because (to paraphrase the OP) "***** didn't want to be seen in his car" is pretty appalling.

 

[Shivhappy]

Yeah, that's pretty extreme. So you have a shit car, and she observed as much. My brother always makes jokes about how shit his car is and he likes to laugh about it. This girl probably thought she was being playful. However, if I am to give you the benefit of the doubt and say that she was deliberately being snide and offensive, you could at least have given some indication that you are an overly sensitive child first, so she could have a chance to modify her behaviour.

While it depends a bit on how far you were from your destination, your actions were just rude and uncalled for. I mean, she "disrespected" your car? Really? You need to get the fuck over yourself.

She disrespected him, multiple times, as he was going out of his way to do her a favor. Definitely not being an "overly sensitive child", he was being a gentleman until she made it clear that she was an inconsiderate *****.

Actions justified.
Carry on sir.

She didn't disrespect him. She just said he has a shit car. Her comments were at best an attempt at joking around, and at worst an attempt to convince him to save up for a new car because he's missing out on things like air conditioning and decent sound quality. The OP keeps mentioning that she thought she deserved a luxury car or something, but he never actually quotes her claiming to be embarrassed by the car. She was just pointing out that it might be time to replace it. Big deal.

In fact, I hope she did say something to the effect that she was embarrassed by the car, otherwise the assumption that she was complaining because (to paraphrase the OP) "***** didn't want to be seen in his car" is pretty appalling.

The only thing that should have come out of her mouth was "Thanks for the ride." or "Need any gas money"-Period. Beggars cant be choosers. Hopefully she learned a lesson in gratitude.

 

[manic_depressive13]

The only thing that should have come out of her mouth was "Thanks for the ride." or "Need any gas money"-Period. Beggars cant be choosers. Hopefully she learned a lesson in gratitude.

People should be able to voice a harmless opinion without fear of someone getting their panties in a twist. If he was that offended, he should have told her so. However, ditching her on the street after promising to give her a ride, simply because of a few remarks which she probably never fathomed would be taken so personally, is not acceptable to me. Clearly you disagree, and as a result we will never be friends. I can deal with this.

 

[Shivhappy]

The only thing that should have come out of her mouth was "Thanks for the ride." or "Need any gas money"-Period. Beggars cant be choosers. Hopefully she learned a lesson in gratitude.

People should be able to voice a harmless opinion without fear of someone getting their panties in a twist. If he was that offended, he should have told her so. However, ditching her on the street after promising to give her a ride, simply because of a few remarks which she probably never fathomed would be taken so personally, is not acceptable to me. Clearly you disagree, and as a result we will never be friends. I can deal with this.

Your definition of 'harmless' must vary from mine and most people on this thread. Being continually insulted while doing someone a favor is unacceptable.

 

[Creator002]

I would have said something before kicking her out. Something like "Would you like to walk then?" I mean, you're justified kicking people out of your car, especially if there really have been 8 people have been idiots.

 

[manic_depressive13]

Your definition of 'harmless' must vary from mine and most people on this thread. Being continually insulted while doing someone a favor is unacceptable.

No, your definition of 'insult' is clearly different from mine, because someone pointing out that a crappy car is crappy isn't something a rational person would take offense to. The OP may claim she was saying "I deserve better", but as far as I can tell from the examples he gave, she was just saying "you need a new car". That is not a personal insult.

But regardless of any of that, suddenly telling someone to "get the fuck out" with no warning whatsoever is inordinately aggressive for something so petty. Anyway, I don't care anymore. Your lack of perspective is not my concern.

 

[Shivhappy]

Your definition of 'harmless' must vary from mine and most people on this thread. Being continually insulted while doing someone a favor is unacceptable.

No, your definition of 'insult' is clearly different from mine, because someone pointing out that a crappy car is crappy isn't something a rational person would take offense to. The OP may claim she was saying "I deserve better", but as far as I can tell from the examples he gave, she was just saying "you need a new car". That is not a personal insult.

But regardless of any of that, suddenly telling someone to "get the fuck out" with no warning whatsoever is inordinately aggressive for something so petty. Anyway, I don't care anymore. Your lack of perspective is not my concern.

"Lack of perspective"? I think not, i've been on both sides of the coin, driving 45mins out of my way to pick up a co-worker for weeks at a time. Did they complain about anything?-no, they thanked me, offered me gas money from time to time, bought me lunch as a show of gratitude as normal people do. I also borrowed my friends beat up Tercel, (which he dubbed the Ter-smell because of the moldy smell) it had one seat was filled with boxes of old car parts, and ran on three cylinders, when i had to have my transmission replaced. So did i complain?-of course not, i bought him a six-pack of his favorite brew, filled the car with gas and thanked him for helping me.

In that situation i may not have used the phrase "get the fuck out" but my meaning would have been the same.

 

[Scarim Coral]

Honestly if someone (within reasons) given me a lift to work I wouldn't complain about the car condition. I mean it's rude to say that to someone who is helping you for free.
While yes you may have gotten her fired for kicking her out but the way I see it if she did get fired then it's karma. That her punishment for her rude remark so in another words, what come around come around.

 

[shitoutonme]

Another thing was that she upset me at a bad time. I had a heated argument with my English teacher that morning about how her grading methods are unfair and stupid (as far as I'm concerned, they're retarded), and since I felt wronged, I was more or less discontent and irritable the entire day. It's possible that I might not have reacted in such a manner to that girl's quips if I was in a better mood that day, but like I said, I've been meaning to kick someone out of my car for complaining.

On the other hand, her losing her job would be quite the lesson in appreciation and gratitude. Just sayin'.

So, you were already upset, and then you antagonize the next person to upset you?
And now you go and make a thread on a forum trying to get people to justify what you've done?

I'm sorry. I "antagonized" the next person to upset me? WTF? How the heck did I antagonize her? Clarify please.

What you have here is a guilty conscience.

No.

Yes, it is rude for her to have pointed out the flaws of your car, but its just as rude to take out your frustration with your English teacher and other life problems on this girl.
At least, that's how you feel deep down, or you wouldn't have made this thread. People don't just make threads like this unless they want approval for their actions, and you yourself have voiced doubt on the matter.

Lol I'm sorry, but the amount of presumption behind your words made me laugh out loud. Perhaps it's not even presumption but rather you misreading my post that has caused you to come to this conclusion. Allow me to break it down for you:

1. If you took my entire post into consideration, you would know that I've been meaning to kick a complainer out of my car for the longest time. I mentioned this twice. Sure, the extra frustration might have further encouraged me to do it, but that act was already part of the plan. At most, it was only a partial motivator.

2. Remember that one statement? "And I suggest my fellow guys around the world to take up the same stance." Does that sentence suggest I need validation? I already gave it to myself. Perhaps the last person who was the OP of a similar thread needed a pat on the back for this, but I assure you, I don't. Again, I say, "Bitches can walk to work."

3. Apologies? No, thanks. Perhaps you feel you were guilty of treating someone a certain way due to your emotional state, but me - not so much.

No, your definition of 'insult' is clearly different from mine, because someone pointing out that a crappy car is crappy isn't something a rational person would take offense to. The OP may claim she was saying "I deserve better", but as far as I can tell from the examples he gave, she was just saying "you need a new car". That is not a personal insult.

Here's something you fail to take into consideration: tone of voice. Had this girl been cracking jokes,I wouldn't mind, because plenty of people do that. Hell, even I do, but the way in which her comments were said made all the difference.

And say what? "You need a new car"? I disagree, but had she said those exact words with that smug, spiteful tone she was speaking with the other day, I would have said, "A new car? Fuck you, *****. Pay me! This ain't a charity ride. Give me the money for that new whip! I'm helping your no-car-having broke ass get someplace." And then, of course, kick her out once we reach a stop light or sign.

 

[Erana]

Another thing was that she upset me at a bad time. I had a heated argument with my English teacher that morning about how her grading methods are unfair and stupid (as far as I'm concerned, they're retarded), and since I felt wronged, I was more or less discontent and irritable the entire day. It's possible that I might not have reacted in such a manner to that girl's quips if I was in a better mood that day, but like I said, I've been meaning to kick someone out of my car for complaining.

On the other hand, her losing her job would be quite the lesson in appreciation and gratitude. Just sayin'.

So, you were already upset, and then you antagonize the next person to upset you?
And now you go and make a thread on a forum trying to get people to justify what you've done?

I'm sorry. I "antagonized" the next person to upset me? WTF? How the heck did I antagonize her? Clarify please.

What you have here is a guilty conscience.

No.

Yes, it is rude for her to have pointed out the flaws of your car, but its just as rude to take out your frustration with your English teacher and other life problems on this girl.
At least, that's how you feel deep down, or you wouldn't have made this thread. People don't just make threads like this unless they want approval for their actions, and you yourself have voiced doubt on the matter.

Lol I'm sorry, but the amount of presumption behind your words made me laugh out loud. Perhaps it's not even presumption but rather you misreading my post that has caused you to come to this conclusion. Allow me to break it down for you:

1. If you took my entire post into consideration, you would know that I've been meaning to kick a complainer out of my car for the longest time. I mentioned this twice. Sure, the extra frustration might have further encouraged me to do it, but that act was already part of the plan. At most, it was only a partial motivator.

2. Remember that one statement? "And I suggest my fellow guys around the world to take up the same stance." Does that sentence suggest I need validation? I already gave it to myself. Perhaps the last person who was the OP of a similar thread needed a pat on the back for this, but I assure you, I don't. Again, I say, "Bitches can walk to work."

3. Apologies? No, thanks. Perhaps you feel you were guilty of treating someone a certain way due to your emotional state, but me - not so much.

No, your definition of 'insult' is clearly different from mine, because someone pointing out that a crappy car is crappy isn't something a rational person would take offense to. The OP may claim she was saying "I deserve better", but as far as I can tell from the examples he gave, she was just saying "you need a new car". That is not a personal insult.

Here's something you fail to take into consideration: tone of voice. Had this girl been cracking jokes,I wouldn't mind, because plenty of people do that. Hell, even I do, but the way in which her comments were said made all the difference.

And say what? "You need a new car"? I disagree, but had she said those exact words with that smug, spiteful tone she was speaking with the other day, I would have said, "A new car? Fuck you, *****. Pay me! This ain't a charity ride. Give me the money for that new whip! I'm helping your no-car-having broke ass get someplace." And then, of course, kick her out once we reach a stop light or sign.

OK, if you felt perfectly good about what you did, you wouldn't have to go making a thread on the internet straight up asking for people to justify your behavior. The fact that you say that other people should behave as you do doesn't change the fact that You made a thread poll where the only options are to say that your behavior is either a little too much, or completely justified.

More to the point, kicking someone out of a vehicle without notice over commenting about the state of a car is not something emotionally stable people do.
And their lack of a reaction isn't because they're weak or a doormat, its because they don't care.
And if they feel that the person who is insulting their car needs to be taught a lesson, they simply refuse to give them simple favors in the future.

Gotta also point out that you have been planning to throw someone out of your car without warning for a while now. That alone should throw up flags for you being a bit over reactive. Why should one person, regardless of why they said something you took as off color, have to pay for all your little pent up grievances?
And just because you were doing her a favor doesn't mean that you have complete social privilege to do whatever you want. You said you'd give her a ride, so be a man and live up to your word.

You're waaaaaay too sensitive about your car, and your actions are extremely drastic. There is something making you this way, probably personal issues or teenage hormones or sleep deprivation or something like that.
My point being is that you're trusting your emotions too much. Just because it seems like someone's being a horrible terrible person doesn't mean that they are nearly as bad as you're thinking, or even harbor any malicious intent at all.

"I felt wronged" is one of the worst motivations to act upon in human history.

 

[Kinokohatake]

You sir, deserve a trophy. Congrats on being way ballsier that I could ever be.

 

[emeraldrafael]

my air conditioning doesnt work so when people tell me about it I always just say thats why i got a car without power windows (which also bothers people. and I dont have power locks either, which people think is weird and act like someone is going to jump in and steal the car. just push the little peg down, it doesnt unlock fromt he outside without a key (to my knowledge at least)). And i dont have a CD player (I need to get on getting a stereo system for my car so i can listen to my CDs).

besides, its a 99 Ford escort with just over 80K miles and i got it for about 1800 after transfer fees. you cant really beat that.

anyway, OT, people lose me when they start bitching about how something isnt canon or part of a series (see the highlander movies, the star wars prequels, recently in the wing commander <url=http://www.escapistmagazine.com/news/view/112888-New-Wing-Commander-Rumors-Start-to-Swirl>article here about prophecy). i always think its just a wonder of the world that people can be so delusional to fact in the world.

 

[Macgyvercas]

who want to be seen riding around in a luxury car sitting on 22's.

Totally off topic, but could you explain what 22's are? Because every time I hear it, I immediately think of rifles, and I'm pretty sure that's not what you mean.

 

[The-Epicly-Named-Man]

I can see how some one could do that if they were in a bad mood. Don't feel guilty about it, she was in the wrong, but it wasn't the best way to handle the situation.

PS; I dunno why you get sh*t about your car, over here 90's Honda Civics are quite popular.

 

[Brandon237]

While I wouldn't have done, I certainly don't condemn it. When you give her a lift as a favour and then she continually insults your car... she was kinda asking for it. Returning favours seems to be a lost idea these days...

 

[shitoutonme]

OK, if you felt perfectly good about what you did, you wouldn't have to go making a thread on the internet straight up asking for people to justify your behavior. The fact that you say that other people should behave as you do doesn't change the fact that You made a thread poll where the only options are to say that your behavior is either a little too much, or completely justified.

Ohhhh. Well, at least I now know what you were getting at. No, the poll is simply to bait people, if you will. Since you're a regular member of The Escapist, I have little doubt that you know that threads with polls are a little more popular than those without; the fact that there are plenty of awesome discussion topics in which people post something along the lines of "A poll would be nice" supports this. When I make a topic, I'd rather it not go dead within 24 hours; it makes me feel like I actually had something interesting to say. So yeah, it's more about being an attention whore than asking for validation, but I can't knock you for thinking I was looking for some. However, the question put forth in the poll was simply for discussion's sake.

More to the point, kicking someone out of a vehicle without notice over commenting about the state of a car is not something emotionally stable people do.

So? Do I get points if I tell you I did it in a calm manner?

And their lack of a reaction isn't because they're weak or a doormat, its because they don't care.
And if they feel that the person who is insulting their car needs to be taught a lesson, they simply refuse to give them simple favors in the future.

That first part may be true for some, but from what I've seen, the reason most people don't voice their discontent is because they're afraid to. Kudos to the ones that don't care though, and as far as punishment is concerned, I disagree. Swift justice is my preference, especially in this case. Why? Because that person may very well never need that ride again.

Gotta also point out that you have been planning to throw someone out of your car without warning for a while now. That alone should throw up flags for you being a bit over reactive. Why should one person, regardless of why they said something you took as off color, have to pay for all your little pent up grievances?

Well, since you were kind and open enough to share your personal experience in your previous post, I'll be straight with you; I've been a doormat for a large chunk of my life. In fact, it's only been 2 years since I experienced an epiphany of sorts that turned me into the type of guy that takes no shit, unless money is involved. Suffice it to say that what happened back then hurt me deeply, and I must admit, past grievances have much to do with who I am today. But guess what? I don't give a shit. Actions have consequences, and people shouldn't be so quick to insult someone they don't know well. The girl I kicked out of my car failed to be considerate and thoughtful of those 2 things and suffered for her actions. Oh, yeah, you could say that I may suffer for doing that to her; for all I know, she's rallying her big brothers to pay me a visit soon. Whatever. I carry a weapon of some sort at all times, since I'm slightly paranoid. They can come see me. I'm not apologizing for teaching a hard lesson.

And just because you were doing her a favor doesn't mean that you have complete social privilege to do whatever you want. You said you'd give her a ride, so be a man and live up to your word.

I applaud your sense of chivalry and honor, but you can keep your brand of "manliness" to yourself. I'll decide for myself what's manly for me to do, and kicking that ***** out of my car was manly as far as I'm concerned.

You're waaaaaay too sensitive about your car, and your actions are extremely drastic. There is something making you this way, probably personal issues or teenage hormones or sleep deprivation or something like that.

See second to last paragraph above.

My point being is that you're trusting your emotions too much. Just because it seems like someone's being a horrible terrible person doesn't mean that they are nearly as bad as you're thinking, or even harbor any malicious intent at all.

True, but that's not really my concern. I, myself, try my best not to come off as insulting while interacting with people, unless, of course, I'm reacting to someone insulting me. If most people tried doing the same, there'd be a lot less trouble to go around, but yeah, sometimes people will take offense regardless. Oh well. It is what it is.

"I felt wronged" is one of the worst motivations to act upon in human history.

Heh, I'm sure the large congregation of atheist on this site would disagree with you, but you have a point. Of course, my answer is simple: I don't give a shit. I'd rather live a life with a few conflicts, scrapes, and bruises and be able to walk with my head high than let people push me around and walk over me. Nuff said.

who want to be seen riding around in a luxury car sitting on 22's.

Totally off topic, but could you explain what 22's are? Because every time I hear it, I immediately think of rifles, and I'm pretty sure that's not what you mean.

It's referring to 22-inch rims.

 

[ZeroMachine]

You've got to be... you kicked her out? Instead of, you know, explaining "listen, I like my car, and it's done me right since I got it. I don't need something fancy".

Wow, dude.

You take that stuff way too seriously. She wasn't attacking you or anything.

Damn...