Poll: You are an evil overlord! Which army of mooks do you employ?
- Thread starter Brendan Stepladder
- Start date
Sort term plans call for an army of automaton warriors, drones and titans. Anything less would not be a true show of my genius.
Once my flying Doom Fortress has cemented my rightful place in history I will just recruit my peacekeeping force from those forward thinking enough to volunteer.
Once my flying Doom Fortress has cemented my rightful place in history I will just recruit my peacekeeping force from those forward thinking enough to volunteer.
Catgirls.
We would have the Maid division, the Miniskirt division, the Bellydancer division, the Bikini division, the Catsuit division, the Winged division and the kitten division.
For clarification, the kitten division is the non-sexualized one, just tiny, cute & bring out so much paternal/maternal instinct in anyone that nobody would ever have the heart to attack them.
Most worlds would be *asking* to surrender to us.
Though I probably would be too busy "reviewing the troops" to ever conquer anywhere.
Wouldn't care.
We would have the Maid division, the Miniskirt division, the Bellydancer division, the Bikini division, the Catsuit division, the Winged division and the kitten division.
For clarification, the kitten division is the non-sexualized one, just tiny, cute & bring out so much paternal/maternal instinct in anyone that nobody would ever have the heart to attack them.
Most worlds would be *asking* to surrender to us.
Though I probably would be too busy "reviewing the troops" to ever conquer anywhere.
Wouldn't care.
The Roman legions by a MILE. While it will take time to really drill into them modern military concepts and use of current weapons, they are soldiers not warriors. They are drilled to rely on the man by their side, to be loyal to their commander. Concepts such as cover (their turtle formation against archers) and the benefits of ranged combat (use javalins to weaken an enemies charge) they already know, so just showing how superior modern weapons are to them should encourage the switch.
Even some of their old tactics don't have to die. Heavy Kevlar shields could allow the legions to not have to completely forgo their shields, and making throwable grenades with the same weight and general shape of a javalin would give them explosive power.
It's going to be a lot of work, but it is worth it in the end.
Even some of their old tactics don't have to die. Heavy Kevlar shields could allow the legions to not have to completely forgo their shields, and making throwable grenades with the same weight and general shape of a javalin would give them explosive power.
It's going to be a lot of work, but it is worth it in the end.
Skynet will only kill you quickly, seeing you only as only an expendable means to an end.Lunar Templar said:off that list? Skynet, seems the best choice.
off ANY list though?
Tyranids
Tyranids see you as useful biomass, and your death will not be so mercifully short...
Although, I am thankful you didn't bring up the Dark Eldar...
I would employ the greatest evil army of all. Legions of corporate lawyers, tax attorneys, copy-right specialists, and, most importantly, government lobbyists, so that I can partition congress/sauron/galactic senate to do my bidding. I won't get to blow up planets or burn white cities, but atleast I'll get to enjoy real power while the petty dark lords enjoy their little games.
OP? Sir, as a highly respected Lord Inquisitor I require at least that much just to make my pre-Exterminatus breakfast. One time we ran out of beans, I had to requisition half of the Deathwatch to find me the particular brand I needed before condemning a billion souls to oblivion. Anything less than the Branston ones that taste different but in a good way is heresy. A jar of Branston pickle is kept preserved within the holy palace on Terra should the powers of chaos ever attempt to interfere with my pre-Exterminatus lunch. Bisto gravy is on hand at virtually every Astartes fortress monastery for pretty much the same reason.Simalacrum said:
OT: I'm feeling fairly torn now, on the one hand the shot of Lord Inq Coteaz surrounded by Grey Knight terminators seems pretty badass. On the other I think you're just looking for a coup if your entourage looks more menacing than you do. I want to go with Star Wars Storm Troopers, but after they've had the poor aim and stupidity beaten out of them by a combination of 40k Cadian Storm Troopers and Halo ODSTs. And I get 40k Artificer Armour, so as to look way cooler and more powerful than the bunch of them.
I'm running on the assumption that I have control over said groups.Not G. Ivingname said:Skynet will only kill you quickly, seeing you only as only an expendable means to an end.Lunar Templar said:off that list? Skynet, seems the best choice.
off ANY list though?
Tyranids
Tyranids see you as useful biomass, and your death will not be so mercifully short...
Although, I am thankful you didn't bring up the Dark Eldar...
You know,my first choice would've been the United Earth Federation during the Seraphim War. The only human troops are the Commanders in amphibious walking tanks,can build their own staging bases,which in turn build their strike forces. The Commanders are competent,wield devastating technology and firepower,and can,within hours,establish a country-annexing presence. Given a day,one Commander could hold all of North America. Not even the Adeptus Astartes can hold a candle to these guys.
And then there's the Fatboy. It crawls along on land,can scud along the seabed,has FOUR TRIPLE BARRELED BATTLESHIP TURRETS,can repair and refuel aircraft two at a time,has an energy shield dome,gattling cannons and surface-to-air railguns,has torpedoes for pesky ships,and it can EVEN PRODUCE IT'S OWN LAND ESCORT. Ladies and gentlemen,the UEF is nothing to sneeze at.
But,from the list? I'm unfamiliar with most,and of the few I do know,only one could be relevant in a modern setting: Skynet. Why,yes,I'd LOVE legions of unfeeling killing machines,as well as total control over world telecommunications. And time travel. Can't forget time travel.
And then,Skynet met Achron. And the world trembled.
And then there's the Fatboy. It crawls along on land,can scud along the seabed,has FOUR TRIPLE BARRELED BATTLESHIP TURRETS,can repair and refuel aircraft two at a time,has an energy shield dome,gattling cannons and surface-to-air railguns,has torpedoes for pesky ships,and it can EVEN PRODUCE IT'S OWN LAND ESCORT. Ladies and gentlemen,the UEF is nothing to sneeze at.
But,from the list? I'm unfamiliar with most,and of the few I do know,only one could be relevant in a modern setting: Skynet. Why,yes,I'd LOVE legions of unfeeling killing machines,as well as total control over world telecommunications. And time travel. Can't forget time travel.
And then,Skynet met Achron. And the world trembled.
While that certainly is true in most cases, I believe it actually is official canon that Storm Troopers have horrendous accuracy, something dealing with the fact that they stopped using Jengo Fett clones and started using just random douches as the basis for the imperial army.Copper Zen said:As for my Stormtroopers' firing accuracy, eh, I've noticed that the firing accuracy and combat efficiency is quite high except against anyone protected by Plot Armor.
I'll use my martian death machines, but before starting the war I'll remember to give them their flu shot. No cold is going to stop my force!!The Lazy Blacksmith said:
Edit: If I can't do that then Terminators are my 2nd place winners. After all when you remove the need for a good ending story the machines win by default. They don't need the planet to be 'habitable'. Just wipe out all life on earth.
Damn, for me it's a toss up between Orcs and The Roman Army. I just want an army of feudal warriors to overrun our modern cities.
Really though, in a situation where I could choose one, I would take both.
Really though, in a situation where I could choose one, I would take both.
The Neil Gaiman Cybermen make things rather ideal, really. Any society whose solution to Cybermen is destroying planets and galaxies is only hurting themselves. I could in fact planet Cybermen all over the cosmos in small groups in their empire just to force them to destroy that which they own.
You make an excellent point...but we're talking Evil Overlord stuff and the book says:RJ 17 said:While that certainly is true in most cases, I believe it actually is official canon that Storm Troopers have horrendous accuracy, something dealing with the fact that they stopped using Jengo Fett clones and started using just random douches as the basis for the imperial army.Copper Zen said:As for my Stormtroopers' firing accuracy, eh, I've noticed that the firing accuracy and combat efficiency is quite high except against anyone protected by Plot Armor.
Thus I do away with the following (already posted earlier but I'm using it anyway):
I remember reading somewhere that if the Orcs from Warhammer 40K stopped fighting each other and unified under a single leader, they would easily be able to annihilate all the other races in the galaxy.
So assuming I have the entire Orc army under my extremely sexy control, I get the feeling I would win... against anyone...
So assuming I have the entire Orc army under my extremely sexy control, I get the feeling I would win... against anyone...
From this list, orcs. From any, the Helghast from the Killzone series. I admit to being a fan of that Nazi style of military discipline while not being a fan of Nazi's themselves.
