Question about sexuality.

[Nieroshai]

Some people state that they don't fall in love with a particular gender, they fall in love with a person. Whether this is true or not I cannot be certain. This statement closely models the ideals of my bisexual friends, being happy with either one at any given time.

Apparently there's some sort of scale which allows you to check where you belong on the sexuality scale.

I believe it's 1 to 10 (or 1 to 7, I can't recall), 1 being gay and 10 being straight. A lot of people don't show up as perfect 1's or 10's. A lot of the time you may land as a 2,3 or 8,9. This is for many reasons. You may be able to find beauty in the same sex. You may have had a fantasy or two about the same sex, but you know you'd never actually do anything with them. I believe that it's not as simple as black and white, rather it's more of shades of gray.

Now if you're one of the few individuals that are quite homophobic, not a gay/straight thought in your body and loathe the other option, then yes, you may be a perfect 1 or 10.

I'm sexually attracted to both genders, but I'm in love with one girl who rang out to me completely as my other half. Now note I have a weak sex drive. I can get in the mood, but it takes a dinner and cuddling unless things are just perfect. (Sound like a woman, don't I?) This partially makes it look like I'm asexual, but let me assure you that is not the case.

 

[Nieroshai]

Thinking back now, I can figure out my progression to it.

At age 4 I started showing signs of being of the more feminine attitude
At age 8 I began showing signs of liking guys. Back then it was just REALLY being friends with someone, but still
At age 9 I had my first fantasy about being someone's boyfriend
At age 12 I had my first 'innapropriate' fantasies. This was the same time I discovered masturbation
At age 13 I finally began to think I might be gay
At age 14 I actually properly realised it
At age 15 I finally accepted it and decided it wasn't the end of the world
At age 16 I came out, to find that most people I came out to already knew anyway.

And on the 'does sexuality matter' thing, I don't think it does. Sexuality should ONLY influence your sex life, and maybe certain aspects of your social life. If you let your sexuality control and dictate every aspect of your personality, then you're putting too much stock into your persuasion. Deep down, sexuality is just one part of what makes you who you are.

LOL How can you masturbate to a dude and not realise you like sausage? With me it was basically that I was pretty much born with a very "feminine" personality. My stepdad used that as yet another reason to hate me, alongside my OCD and that man-child competing with me for Mom's attention. I LOVED jewelry, still do. I used to wish I was born a girl. Of course, LONG before I even felt sexual urges(how old was I in 7th grade?) girls made up most of my friends. I just didn't feel comfortable around other guys. I had tons of female friends and 3 guy friends. My first attraction was to a girl around my freshman year, but when she put me down I noticed I had a thing for guys too. Being religious I obviously tried to suppress it, but you know how futile that is. I often have to excuse myself from a room where there's a guy that catches my attention because I'll turn red otherwise. But I've never been able to love a guy, any guy really, which is why I ultimately ended up with a girlfriend. Pretty much no one but her knows I'm inherently bi. I tell the internet because none of you will ever meet and recognize me, lol.

 

[blankedboy]

Meh, I've thought I'm gay for a while now and alot of people know I'm gay. But I'm starting to fall back into the I-might-be-bi train of thoughts, and am feeling vaguely bi at the moment.
I don't really care whether I'm gay or bi, but I don't want to be straight. Strange, I know

 

[conflictofinterests]

I can't remember which came first, but I was romantically attracted (Puppy love, you know the deal) to both a boy and a girl when I was in about 1st grade or so. Since I was closer friends with the girl than the boy, I thought I might be a lesbian for a few minutes as we hugged melodramatically to keep warm from the (probably mild) Utahn winter. After that, I pretty much forgot about my sexuality until high school, when another girl took an abnormal amount of interest in me. We became friends, and later on, we were unofficially dating for a while. I had a few boyfriends before I came to my current partner, a lovely man whom I hope to marry. After that inkling of lesbianism in first grade, I was thoroughly convinced I was straight until the girl in high school showed me otherwise. Now I am comfortably bisexual.

My sexuality only really comes into play when I'm evaluating someone as a sexual partner, in that their own gender DOESN'T come into play. Other than that, I'm happy to neglect to mention it to whomever I wish (especially my prude, supa-Christian mom, who would be more disapproving of bisexuals than of homosexuals, but still VERY disapproving of homosexuals.)

 

[Haydyn]

It's kind of complicated. I know I'm attracted to women. When it comes to other guys, I have no problem cuddling up to a guy around my age as a joke or swing dancing with them. Maybe it's just my lack of a personal bubble. Then when it comes to some anime guys or even video game characters I feel an attraction. Maybe it's just because they are more effeminate than normal.

However the thought of partisapating in homosexual sex disturbs me. I don't wanna dish out too much of my personal life, but it's a key part in finding out where exactly I stand. I have made out with another guy before, and I didn't care for it. (I wouldn't be telling anybody this, but I don't believe homosexuality is wrong, despite my religious beliefs.) I just refer to myself as heteroflexible around company I can trust, my family not included in that.

 

[Killclaw Kilrathi]

Bisexual. In retrospect I know I was always that way, but I didn't actually come to that conclusion for a long time, mainly due to denial. Happens to a lot of people apparently.

 

[MasterOfWorlds]

LOL How can you masturbate to a dude and not realise you like sausage? With me it was basically that I was pretty much born with a very "feminine" personality. My stepdad used that as yet another reason to hate me, alongside my OCD and that man-child competing with me for Mom's attention. I LOVED jewelry, still do. I used to wish I was born a girl. Of course, LONG before I even felt sexual urges(how old was I in 7th grade?) girls made up most of my friends. I just didn't feel comfortable around other guys. I had tons of female friends and 3 guy friends. My first attraction was to a girl around my freshman year, but when she put me down I noticed I had a thing for guys too. Being religious I obviously tried to suppress it, but you know how futile that is. I often have to excuse myself from a room where there's a guy that catches my attention because I'll turn red otherwise. But I've never been able to love a guy, any guy really, which is why I ultimately ended up with a girlfriend. Pretty much no one but her knows I'm inherently bi. I tell the internet because none of you will ever meet and recognize me, lol.

You do realize that most porn out there is between a guy and a girl...right? If you look at it a certain way, if you masturbate to any porn with any sort of penis use, be it actual penis, strap on, or whatever, it is, in a way, masturbating to sausage.

And sure we'd recognize you. You're that guy with the glowy eye that looks vaguely like Rouroni Kenshin. XD

 

[Nieroshai]

LOL How can you masturbate to a dude and not realise you like sausage? With me it was basically that I was pretty much born with a very "feminine" personality. My stepdad used that as yet another reason to hate me, alongside my OCD and that man-child competing with me for Mom's attention. I LOVED jewelry, still do. I used to wish I was born a girl. Of course, LONG before I even felt sexual urges(how old was I in 7th grade?) girls made up most of my friends. I just didn't feel comfortable around other guys. I had tons of female friends and 3 guy friends. My first attraction was to a girl around my freshman year, but when she put me down I noticed I had a thing for guys too. Being religious I obviously tried to suppress it, but you know how futile that is. I often have to excuse myself from a room where there's a guy that catches my attention because I'll turn red otherwise. But I've never been able to love a guy, any guy really, which is why I ultimately ended up with a girlfriend. Pretty much no one but her knows I'm inherently bi. I tell the internet because none of you will ever meet and recognize me, lol.

You do realize that most porn out there is between a guy and a girl...right? If you look at it a certain way, if you masturbate to any porn with any sort of penis use, be it actual penis, strap on, or whatever, it is, in a way, masturbating to sausage.

And sure we'd recognize you. You're that guy with the glowy eye that looks vaguely like Rouroni Kenshin. XD

LOL!
You do have a point, I just figured based on your post that it was specifically and obviously guys only.

 

[Hamster at Dawn]

I'm heterosexual but I don't find other guys disgusting at all, which made me wonder if I was bisexual at one point. Most people seem to dislike seeing people of the same gender naked but nothing like that bothers me at all.

 

[ReservoirAngel]

Thinking back now, I can figure out my progression to it.

At age 4 I started showing signs of being of the more feminine attitude
At age 8 I began showing signs of liking guys. Back then it was just REALLY being friends with someone, but still
At age 9 I had my first fantasy about being someone's boyfriend
At age 12 I had my first 'innapropriate' fantasies. This was the same time I discovered masturbation
At age 13 I finally began to think I might be gay
At age 14 I actually properly realised it
At age 15 I finally accepted it and decided it wasn't the end of the world
At age 16 I came out, to find that most people I came out to already knew anyway.

And on the 'does sexuality matter' thing, I don't think it does. Sexuality should ONLY influence your sex life, and maybe certain aspects of your social life. If you let your sexuality control and dictate every aspect of your personality, then you're putting too much stock into your persuasion. Deep down, sexuality is just one part of what makes you who you are.

LOL How can you masturbate to a dude and not realise you like sausage?

The masturbation and the fantasies about guys were pretty much two seperate things. Very rarely did they overlap. I never masturbated to fantasies about girls, but I didn't masturbate to fantasies about guys either. I just...masturbated. Never had anything really in my mind. The two activities only overlapped when I was 13, which was when I started thinking "holy on...maybe I like dudes..."

 

[vato_loco]

Let's see. Heterosexual male. As far as my memory goes, my interests have always been girls and games (one of which is sexual interest, I'll let you guess which. Oooh you naughty wireless controller, you).

I don't really think sexuality matters much. There's only one thing that pisses me off, and that's the flamboyant gay. You know, the one that is so openly gay and loud that even the ilegitimate clone-son of Liberace and Prince would go 'dude... you need to chill'.

Other than that, no problem with sexual orientation.

 

[CrimsonRegret]

Bi. A while back I had a sexual experience with a friend, and it confused the hell out of me. Since then I had started to watch and read pornography from both orientations, and over this past summer, I realized I was bi, and stopped acting like what I was watching and reading was a "test" every time. I don't really find sexuality that important, in fact I haven't come out. The truth is I'm not afraid to, I just really don't find it a big enough part of my life to bring it up.

 

[Zechnophobe]

As I'm sure many of you have seen, there are a ton of threads about sexuality on here. Now, I'm not trying to start a flame war or anything, but I'm genuinely curious about sexuality and the average person, whether that person be hetero, homo, or bisexual, as well as transgender, pansexual, omnisexual, and the like.

My question is fairly simple, I think. When did you realize that you are the orientation you are? Were you always that way, or did you wake up one day and realize that you were one or another?

As a former psychology major and current sociology major, I find this question very interesting since sexuality seems to be a hot button issue. So I'd like to increase the discussion value of this thread by adding, "Does sexuality really matter?" to the mix.

Please, do try to be calm and reasonable. If someone says something that offends you or tries to troll you, just report them, and don't flood my thread with meaningless semi-thought out rants.

So, I suppose I'll start first. I'm a heterosexual male, have never had any interest in men sexually, and have always (at least as far back as I can remember) had an interest in women. As for the sexuality and it mattering? I don't see how it should affect me unless someone of non-heterosexual orientation hits on me, in which case, I politely decline. I don't see the huge fuss about it.

Been straight as soon as I hit puberty. I definitely can appreciate a guy being handsome, and realize it is nicer to look at, but I don't exactly turn my head in the car, or squint for a better view, like I do with a nice shapely woman.

Some interesting info: According to OKCupid's blog, most young men who call themselves 'bisexual' only EVER persued other men, and most young women who call themselves 'bisexual' only EVER persued men.

It is a pretty cool thing to see on paper. It reinforces my, and many others, suppositions on the matter. Namely that young girls try to look more attractive by putting on the show of bisexuality, and many men try to look less 'gay' for the same reason. Not sure exactly how it works for guys (Maybe being bisexual feels more socially acceptable? Dunno).

 

[aenimau5]

I really am not entirely sure at the moment and no it shouldn't matter in the slightest what sexuality you are

 

[Evil the White]

Pansexual, and comfortable with it. My friends are too. And my girlfriend.

No-one really seems that bothered by it, so that works out ok with me.

 

[BabySinclair]

Never thought about homosexuality til in earnest until I got most the way through middle school and into high school, or women for the most part either. Puberty was pretty much over when I sat down to think things over, just the way my head is, and it was, okay self, are men physically attractive? No. Women? Some. Guess that settles that.

 

[Shadowfaze]

I realised i was straight when i was about 12, I felt very uncomfortable talking to girls about anything. I was a little confused but then once i got up the courage to really get to know one, i realised that spending time surrounded by female company was certainly not a waste of my precious time.

 

[Ohhi]

Well to be completley honest I would have to say I am a straight male with bisexual tendancies
but hey I'm not complaining it's fun why stop.

 

[GroovyV]

Started off straight as a 13 year old, looking at the plethora of dirty movies on HBO whenever the rest of my family was asleep, and then, i guess i found me some pr0n of the non-hetero variety.
I'm currently bisexual, though i guess on that sexuality scale (kensey? or something) i'm leaning more towards the gay. Mostly cuz most of my relationships have been with dudes. (only had a barely there handful with both genders all in all). Still, I could also just be a sexual deviant who likes... sex.

 

[funguy2121]

What would be the diff. between omni- and pan-sexual?