I work for a grocery store chain, the most expensive one in the area. I truly believe it's because we have better quality in our fresh items than our competitors, and that's from my experience of shopping at all of them before getting hired.
But people STILL come in and complain about our prices. "Well, at Market Basket it only costs _____". I so desperately want to respond with "Then go shop at Market Basket, there's one around the corner. Have fun with your produce that'll rot in two days and your meat that's all fat and gristle." Of course I can't say that, so I give some meek, apologetic response about quality and they roll their eyes at me.
I usually work in the bake shop, doing cake orders and other pretty confectionery items. Now, the bake shop is set up so that I'm working behind a counter with the cakes displayed on the other side, the bread wall to my right, and the cookie wall across from me, with two tables of "sweet goods" (danishes, donut holes, packs of muffins, cupcakes, brownies, ect) between my counter and the cookie wall. On top of the cake case is a display of candles, the little 4'' diameter 'baby cakes' (like you get one free with a first birthday order so the baby can eat it with hands and face for those oh-so-adorable photo ops). Bearing all that in mind, here are questions I get EVERY.DAY.
Customer: Is this the smallest cake you have? *holds up an 8'' round*
Me: No, sir/ma'am, there are smaller ones right there. *I point*
Customer: *Will look behind me, behind themselves, at the bread wall, anywhere but where I pointed.*
Me: No, to your left.. no up.. up further..
What I WANT to say: It is RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE!
Customer: Where are your candles?
Me: Right here. *points to the right, directly next to my FACE."
What I WANT to say: It is RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY FACE!
Customer: Do you guys have any cookies?
Me: Behind you, sir/ma'am. *point*
What I WANT to say: If you can't find the cookies, you don't deserve the cookies.
Child Customer: Do you guys have any free cookies?
Me: Yes, in the pastry self serve. They are exactly in the middle, labeled 'party cookies'.
Child Customer: *tries to take a whoopie pie or a donut."
Me: That's not a party cookie, you have to pay for that. In the exact middle.
Child Customer: *sulks, takes a cookie, doesn't say 'thank you' unless prompted by an adult*
What I WANT to say: No, go away and don't bother me.
Customer: Do you have anymore of *some item on the bread-wall* back there somewhere?
Me: All of our stock is out there, we receive fresh bread every morning.
What I WANT to say: Oh yes, because it behooves us to hide our product from the customers.
Customer: Do you have any chocolate cake?
Me: Yes. The hand decorated ones are on the right, the gourmet are on the left.
What I WANT to say is: If you took two seconds to look, you'd find it.
Customer: Can you write *insert anything here* on a cake? And does it cost anything?
Me: Yes I can, and no it doesn't.
What I WANT to say is: There are three signs on the counter that say "We'll be happy to customize any cake free of charge." If you can't read that, how will you read what I put on the cake?
Customer: I want "Happy Birthday Tim. T-I-M." OR I want "Happy Birthday Meagan, Ashleigh and Sean."
Me: *ignores the first one* Which spelling of Megan, Ashley, and Shawn do you want?
And this one I get ALL the time when I'm on register.
Me: Do you have your Stop and Shop card with you?
Customer: Yes, but I left it home/in the car/I lost it.
Me: *blinks* I'll use our store card for you.
What I WANT to say: That isn't what I FUCKING ASKED YOU!
That's all I can think of right now. There are more, but these are the ones that make me want to cut myself.
