Ruin-A-Wish Foundation.

[Dr.Susse]

Granted but it cost a heap per byte.

I wish to know the metric equivalent volume or mass for heap.

 

[lRookiel]

Granted, it will try to kill you.

I wish for infinite power.

 

[steeple]

granted, you try to punch a wall, but you slip and accidentally punch the ground, making it explode around you... do I even need to mention that you're dead?

I wish to have exactly 54 tasty peanuts on a plate next to me

 

[Kuroneko97]

Granted. You choke on the first.

I wish to be more self-confident.

 

[steeple]

granted, your confidence is so great, it has its own gravitational pull, and it's stronger then the sun's. congratulations, you just destroyed our solar system...

I wish to have a folk-song written about my heroic deeds

 

[Dr.Susse]

Granted it is named Steeple the horribly infected.

I wish for a musical score to my life.

 

[steeple]

granted! [http://nyan.cat/]

I wish to be better then I was before... better... stronger... faster...

 

[Dr.Susse]

Granted you are now very daft, punk!

I wish I had the holy grail.

 

[Diablo1099_v1legacy]

Granted, but you get Talked to death by The Knights Who Say "NIH!"

I wish to have the powers of the Spainish Inquisition (To always be un-expected.)

 

[moxretroero]

Granted, but you get shot when you unexpectedly pop up during a bank robbery.

I wish or a list with all the best excuses in the world to convince anyone that I am totally not guilty of or responsible for anything evil I might have done over the past... hrmmm... gonna need at least 20 years.

 

[Infernai]

Granted, but the list is filled with excuses that will instead convince anyone that the act was instead done by the person you love and cherish the most.

I wish i had a pet dragon.

 

[steeple]

granted, you are now roasted, toasted, boasted, and dead. any questions?

I wish I knew how to operate a plate...

 

[Dr.Susse]

Granted but after a large Greek wedding there are no more plates left in the world.

I wish for no more problems.

 

[steeple]

granted, all the problems you've had before the wish are now 100X bigger...

I wish for a thingamajig

 

[Tanner The Monotone]

Granted,your vision was screwed and it was blue.

I want my wish of a car to be ruined.

 

[PinkiePyro]

granted you now have a new car

I wish for a model of whiterun made of cheese

 

[Tanner The Monotone]

Granted, It's made of nacho cheese and turns to mush the second it materializes.

I wish for Tanner Clones to quit going to my house.

 

[Dr.Susse]

Granted but it's no a model of a puddle because it was left next to a heater.

I wish for cheese on toast.

 

[steeple]

granted, the cheese is green, the toast is blue, and on top of that it's raining...

I wish to be able to win the game

 

[PinkiePyro]

granted but it caused the internet to implode


I wish for a life time supply of diet cherry coke