Seriously, why do some guys pull this shit?

[The Random One]

Because some people don't know how to pick up girls and can't even accurately gauge their success.

I tell girls I'm horny over IM all the time. It weeds out the weak.

 

[Insanum]

-snip-

Just cut him loose like a bad smell. He's weird, cannot control his emotion(or testicles), doesn't respect the fact that you have a boyfriend and are happy & is terrible in social situations.

Why do you even associate with this guy? He's not your responsibility.

Tell him what he's done, why its annoying you & give him one last chance to correct his ways, failing that block him from IM and ignore him. He'll get the hint.

 

[McMullen]

*Removed, quote mismatch*

 

[TheDooD]

You must be like a thousand years old because that pure wisdom. I did something like this too, I used to fall "in love" with girls that i found pretty and then proceded to make them like me by doing the stuff you seen in movies and hear in songs. The biggest crash I suffered was when the girl started dating one of my best friends and when they split she started dating my brother.

That's some dirty skank shit right there. Shit right there is why women like that get killed in those cheesy drama movies. You plan old just don't do shit like that to a close circle, where most likely rage is gonna build. A ***** like that wouldn't be allowed near me and or in my house because I wouldn't know where she's been.

Sounds like a lonely man, or a serial rapist. If you don't accept him things may get very ugly.

Assumptions like that are part of why some socially awkward teenage males are so afraid of interaction with the opposite sex; they're afraid that simply looking at a woman, let alone talking to them, will result in them being accused of being a stalker or some such. For that reason I used to have such trouble making eye contact with women that, ironically, they thought I was creepier for it.

If you're a woman, you should know that your assumption really doesn't help the situation. Try not assuming that men are all creeps. Most just don't know how to talk to you. Partly because they're afraid you think they're creeps.

Gotta love dat catch 22 right?

 

[Peteron]

Eh, I would try not talking to that guy ever again. Sounds like a loser/jerk. He doesn't have the right to act so selfishly.

 

[ultrachicken]

If you have guy friends and they aren't gay. They all have a crush on you and should have gave them a chance before tossing them into that friend bin. He's pissed off because he feels betrayed that you can fall for an outsider and not somebody who stood at your side.

What utter bullshit. If you're male and you think like that, you have some problems. If you're female, you have some problematic misconceptions about males. I have female friends who I wouldn't mind getting it on with and some who imagining sex with causes revulsion, and many in between. And I detest the notion that girls have an inherent responsibility to ask all of their male friends out to "give them a chance." If they don't speak up, that's their problem, and they don't necessarily have a crush.

In short, that's a stereotype pulled out of thin air.

 

[pppppppppppppppppp]

So long story short, I've recently started dating a guy who I met and he's awesome. We always enjoy spending time together, we're getting to be very close and we have a lot in common. Everything's going great...

But one of my guy friends is straight-up being an outright ass almost. When I first mentioned that I was dating someone new his first reaction was "I'm happy that you're happy, but I know that I could make you happy too" and launches into this whole sob story about why no one hangs out with him. I'm not very close with this guy at all, but he's constantly telling me how attracted he is to me and all this other shit and he barely even knows me because any time I saw him in person he just sat in a corner and didn't talk to anyone. Just a little bit ago when he was talking to me on IM he mentioned that he was feeling really horny... Why the fuck would I want to know that?! Seriously, this guy doesn't know shit about me and yet he's making all these comments as if he could convince me to dump my boyfriend and instead date him when he doesn't have a real job and no car and constantly whines about crap...

Why do guys pull this shit?!

Edit: Yea I know not all guys are like this, just when some of them do I'm completely unable to grasp as to why they think crap like this will work in their favor.

Dude, get away from this guy, sounds like a real creeper.

And yeah, remember that one douche doesn't speak for the 3.5 billion of us.

 

[Taunta]

Unfortunately, I have a feeling that people who do this are some of the same people that complain about "girls always friendzone nice guys etc etc". In his mind he's being oh so chivalrous and knightly, because he thinks that's all it takes to win a girl, so he's dumbfounded when it doesn't work. But in reality, he's being a super creep. (Actually, that reminds me of a comic I saw that pretty much says the same thing.)

Just sounds like someone needs a reality check.

Would you rather have a guys who doesn't tell you how he feels and instead stone walls you while lying and telling you everything is alright? Women always say they want to hear the truth, the reality is that you want to be lied to, all the time. You want to feel comfortable and happy, reality doesn't work that that way.

Incorrect. First of all, making blanket statements is a big no-no. Secondly, there is such thing as a happy medium between honest to the point of hurtfulness, and constantly deceiving.

The truth is, that honesty is obviously important. I can't tell you how much lies piss and/or turn me off. But there is such thing as knowing when and to what degree it is appropriate. It's called having a social filter.

And if you honestly think that lying about problems and shoving them under the rug, instead of actually communicating is a healthy M.O, then you have a lot to learn about serious relationships.

 

[TheDooD]

If you have guy friends and they aren't gay. They all have a crush on you and should have gave them a chance before tossing them into that friend bin. He's pissed off because he feels betrayed that you can fall for an outsider and not somebody who stood at your side.

What utter bullshit. If you're male and you think like that, you have some problems. If you're female, you have some problematic misconceptions about males. I have female friends who I wouldn't mind getting it on with and some who imagining sex with causes revulsion, and many in between. And I detest the notion that girls have an inherent responsibility to ask all of their male friends out to "give them a chance." If they don't speak up, that's their problem, and they don't necessarily have a crush.

In short, that's a stereotype pulled out of thin air.

Ok so you won't be mad if a girl you know that knows you're crushing on her for a while just falls for some outsider just because she can. You can't tell me you won't be jelly as fuck man.

Plus I'm not saying she has to go out with ALL her male friends. She does have to give the ones that admit that they love her a legit chance or completely make it it an neutral relationship none of the in between shit.

If a woman knows you're crushing on her and she's just not that into him. She better END it there completely, cover all holes or a guy is gonna think he still has a chance. When she doesn't get it through his head when she does gets a boyfriend causes problems because he thinks he been queued up to be the next lover. When he was never really in line in the first place.

You say I'm putting shit out of the air but I've seen and been though shit like this and overall it's one of the most annoying things a person can do. Which is why I make sure I get my point across when I'm dealing with a woman I find attractive.

 

[Taunta]

If you have guy friends and they aren't gay. They all have a crush on you and should have gave them a chance before tossing them into that friend bin. He's pissed off because he feels betrayed that you can fall for an outsider and not somebody who stood at your side.

What utter bullshit. If you're male and you think like that, you have some problems. If you're female, you have some problematic misconceptions about males. I have female friends who I wouldn't mind getting it on with and some who imagining sex with causes revulsion, and many in between. And I detest the notion that girls have an inherent responsibility to ask all of their male friends out to "give them a chance." If they don't speak up, that's their problem, and they don't necessarily have a crush.

In short, that's a stereotype pulled out of thin air.

Ok so you won't be mad if a girl you know that knows you're crushing on her for a while just falls for some outsider just because she can. You can't tell me you won't be jelly as fuck man.

Plus I'm not saying she has to go out with ALL her male friends. She does have to give the ones that admit that they love her a legit chance or completely make it it an neutral relationship none of the in between shit.

If a woman knows you're crushing on her and she's just not that into him. She better END it there completely, cover all holes or a guy is gonna think he still has a chance. When she doesn't get it through his head when she does gets a boyfriend causes problems because he thinks he been queued up to be the next lover. When he was never really in line in the first place.

You say I'm putting shit out of the air but I've seen and been though shit like this and overall it's one of the most annoying things a person can do. Which is why I make sure I get my point across when I'm dealing with a woman I find attractive.

While I agree that leading people on is a bad thing, the feminist in me find the idea "She does have to give the ones that admit that they love her a legit chance or completely make it it an neutral relationship none of the in between shit." extremely offensive.

Everyone is entitled to their preferences, and just because this guy has made his feelings known doesn't mean she should feel obligated to go out with him. From what I understand of your argument, you're saying that the first guy should feel cheated that she voluntarily chose another man, which is untrue. The first guy is not entitled to her in any way, and it's pretty obvious why she has no interest in him. He completely lacks tact.

And while I can agree with you that leading people on is not a good practice, from what I've understood from the OP, she hasn't flirted with him at all, and in fact has insulted him to his face. "Leading someone on" implies that she was flirting back with him in the first place, but had no interest in dating him. Sounds to me like she wasn't leading him on, he just has a terrible talent for picking up not-so-subtle hints, and now he's trying to guilt trip her because she has this whole "free will" thing goin on.

 

[Baneat]

and no car .

Yeah! Guys are so shallow!

 

[ultrachicken]

If you have guy friends and they aren't gay. They all have a crush on you and should have gave them a chance before tossing them into that friend bin. He's pissed off because he feels betrayed that you can fall for an outsider and not somebody who stood at your side.

What utter bullshit. If you're male and you think like that, you have some problems. If you're female, you have some problematic misconceptions about males. I have female friends who I wouldn't mind getting it on with and some who imagining sex with causes revulsion, and many in between. And I detest the notion that girls have an inherent responsibility to ask all of their male friends out to "give them a chance." If they don't speak up, that's their problem, and they don't necessarily have a crush.

In short, that's a stereotype pulled out of thin air.

Ok so you won't be mad if a girl you know that knows you're crushing on her for a while just falls for some outsider just because she can. You can't tell me you won't be jelly as fuck man.

No, I wouldn't be mad. And the only way she would know I was crushing on her would be if I told her, at which point she would either have to say yes or turn me down, which I'd say is dealing with the matter fairly.

Plus I'm not saying she has to go out with ALL her male friends. She does have to give the ones that admit that they love her a legit chance or completely make it it an neutral relationship none of the in between shit.

Yes, you were saying that. You said that all of a given girl's male friends have a crush on her, and that she should give them a chance. There was no distinction between "get with ALL the guys" and "get with the guys who speak up." If that's not what you meant, fine, but understand why I thought you meant that a female should date or turn down every male she knows.

If a woman knows you're crushing on her and she's just not that into him. She better END it there completely, cover all holes or a guy is gonna think he still has a chance. When she doesn't get it through his head when she does gets a boyfriend causes problems because he thinks he been queued up to be the next lover. When he was never really in line in the first place.

Yes, if a woman has definitively been asked out by someone, she should give a definitive answer. There is no argument to be had here.

You say I'm putting shit out of the air but I've seen and been though shit like this and overall it's one of the most annoying things a person can do. Which is why I make sure I get my point across when I'm dealing with a woman I find attractive.

I would say that the stereotype of all guys wanting to fuck all the women they associate with is pulling shit out of thin air. And anecdotes do not count as conclusive evidence.

 

[MrFluffy-X]

poor little horny kid

 

[Herr Schatz]

I almost vomited when you said he didn't have a car! I can't blame you for not wanting to be with a loser like that! Next you'll be telling us his house only has one bathroom!

 

[TheDooD]

If you have guy friends and they aren't gay. They all have a crush on you and should have gave them a chance before tossing them into that friend bin. He's pissed off because he feels betrayed that you can fall for an outsider and not somebody who stood at your side.

What utter bullshit. If you're male and you think like that, you have some problems. If you're female, you have some problematic misconceptions about males. I have female friends who I wouldn't mind getting it on with and some who imagining sex with causes revulsion, and many in between. And I detest the notion that girls have an inherent responsibility to ask all of their male friends out to "give them a chance." If they don't speak up, that's their problem, and they don't necessarily have a crush.

In short, that's a stereotype pulled out of thin air.

Ok so you won't be mad if a girl you know that knows you're crushing on her for a while just falls for some outsider just because she can. You can't tell me you won't be jelly as fuck man.

No, I wouldn't be mad. And the only way she would know I was crushing on her would be if I told her, at which point she would either have to say yes or turn me down, which I'd say is dealing with the matter fairly.

Plus I'm not saying she has to go out with ALL her male friends. She does have to give the ones that admit that they love her a legit chance or completely make it it an neutral relationship none of the in between shit.

Yes, you were saying that. You said that all of a given girl's male friends have a crush on her, and that she should give them a chance. There was no distinction between "get with ALL the guys" and "get with the guys who speak up." If that's not what you meant, fine, but understand why I thought you meant that a female should date or turn down every male she knows.

If a woman knows you're crushing on her and she's just not that into him. She better END it there completely, cover all holes or a guy is gonna think he still has a chance. When she doesn't get it through his head when she does gets a boyfriend causes problems because he thinks he been queued up to be the next lover. When he was never really in line in the first place.

Yes, if a woman has definitively been asked out by someone, she should give a definitive answer. There is no argument to be had here.

You say I'm putting shit out of the air but I've seen and been though shit like this and overall it's one of the most annoying things a person can do. Which is why I make sure I get my point across when I'm dealing with a woman I find attractive.

I would say that the stereotype of all guys wanting to fuck all the women they associate with is pulling shit out of thin air. And anecdotes do not count as conclusive evidence.

The last point isn't really a stereotype when boys notice that girls are hot and sex really feels good. You can't turn off that feeling unless you become jaded to it. Which I have become and I think that nobody really should lose that feeling. The guys that end up jaded because they have had bad relationships, been used strung along and or just tired of the grind of it all.

 

[TheDooD]

If you have guy friends and they aren't gay. They all have a crush on you and should have gave them a chance before tossing them into that friend bin. He's pissed off because he feels betrayed that you can fall for an outsider and not somebody who stood at your side.

What utter bullshit. If you're male and you think like that, you have some problems. If you're female, you have some problematic misconceptions about males. I have female friends who I wouldn't mind getting it on with and some who imagining sex with causes revulsion, and many in between. And I detest the notion that girls have an inherent responsibility to ask all of their male friends out to "give them a chance." If they don't speak up, that's their problem, and they don't necessarily have a crush.

In short, that's a stereotype pulled out of thin air.

Ok so you won't be mad if a girl you know that knows you're crushing on her for a while just falls for some outsider just because she can. You can't tell me you won't be jelly as fuck man.

Plus I'm not saying she has to go out with ALL her male friends. She does have to give the ones that admit that they love her a legit chance or completely make it it an neutral relationship none of the in between shit.

If a woman knows you're crushing on her and she's just not that into him. She better END it there completely, cover all holes or a guy is gonna think he still has a chance. When she doesn't get it through his head when she does gets a boyfriend causes problems because he thinks he been queued up to be the next lover. When he was never really in line in the first place.

You say I'm putting shit out of the air but I've seen and been though shit like this and overall it's one of the most annoying things a person can do. Which is why I make sure I get my point across when I'm dealing with a woman I find attractive.

While I agree that leading people on is a bad thing, the feminist in me find the idea "She does have to give the ones that admit that they love her a legit chance or completely make it it an neutral relationship none of the in between shit." extremely offensive.

Everyone is entitled to their preferences, and just because this guy has made his feelings known doesn't mean she should feel obligated to go out with him. From what I understand of your argument, you're saying that the first guy should feel cheated that she voluntarily chose another man, which is untrue. The first guy is not entitled to her in any way, and it's pretty obvious why she has no interest in him. He completely lacks tact.

And while I can agree with you that leading people on is not a good practice, from what I've understood from the OP, she hasn't flirted with him at all, and in fact has insulted him to his face. "Leading someone on" implies that she was flirting back with him in the first place, but had no interest in dating him. Sounds to me like she wasn't leading him on, he just has a terrible talent for picking up not-so-subtle hints, and now he's trying to guilt trip her because she has this whole "free will" thing goin on.

She wasn't leading him but she sure as hell didn't close the door either. I still stand by my point if either a girl or guy is dealing with a someone and he comes out and says they loves them. They better either level up that "friend" relationship to lovers or make it a professional friendly one. Don't lead them on and don't leave him in the dark.

 

[TheRundownRabbit]

While I was reading the first part, I was like "this is natural, he likes you and wants you to date him by guilting you to date him, I used to be like that in my early high-school days", then I read on "...okay this guy is a crazy pervert and I completely take back my what I said before."

If you ignore him he will keep at it, try telling him off. I found that to be the most useful when dealing with crazy people, and that's it, he's just a crazy leech looking for sex and sympathy.

 

[FenrirsWilly]

He's a needy little b#$@^, tell him one solid final "no, not interested" and set him to ignore on whatever IM system you use.

 

[Taunta]

If you have guy friends and they aren't gay. They all have a crush on you and should have gave them a chance before tossing them into that friend bin. He's pissed off because he feels betrayed that you can fall for an outsider and not somebody who stood at your side.

What utter bullshit. If you're male and you think like that, you have some problems. If you're female, you have some problematic misconceptions about males. I have female friends who I wouldn't mind getting it on with and some who imagining sex with causes revulsion, and many in between. And I detest the notion that girls have an inherent responsibility to ask all of their male friends out to "give them a chance." If they don't speak up, that's their problem, and they don't necessarily have a crush.

In short, that's a stereotype pulled out of thin air.

Ok so you won't be mad if a girl you know that knows you're crushing on her for a while just falls for some outsider just because she can. You can't tell me you won't be jelly as fuck man.

Plus I'm not saying she has to go out with ALL her male friends. She does have to give the ones that admit that they love her a legit chance or completely make it it an neutral relationship none of the in between shit.

If a woman knows you're crushing on her and she's just not that into him. She better END it there completely, cover all holes or a guy is gonna think he still has a chance. When she doesn't get it through his head when she does gets a boyfriend causes problems because he thinks he been queued up to be the next lover. When he was never really in line in the first place.

You say I'm putting shit out of the air but I've seen and been though shit like this and overall it's one of the most annoying things a person can do. Which is why I make sure I get my point across when I'm dealing with a woman I find attractive.

While I agree that leading people on is a bad thing, the feminist in me find the idea "She does have to give the ones that admit that they love her a legit chance or completely make it it an neutral relationship none of the in between shit." extremely offensive.

Everyone is entitled to their preferences, and just because this guy has made his feelings known doesn't mean she should feel obligated to go out with him. From what I understand of your argument, you're saying that the first guy should feel cheated that she voluntarily chose another man, which is untrue. The first guy is not entitled to her in any way, and it's pretty obvious why she has no interest in him. He completely lacks tact.

And while I can agree with you that leading people on is not a good practice, from what I've understood from the OP, she hasn't flirted with him at all, and in fact has insulted him to his face. "Leading someone on" implies that she was flirting back with him in the first place, but had no interest in dating him. Sounds to me like she wasn't leading him on, he just has a terrible talent for picking up not-so-subtle hints, and now he's trying to guilt trip her because she has this whole "free will" thing goin on.

She wasn't leading him but she sure as hell didn't close the door either. I still stand by my point if either a girl or guy is dealing with a someone and he comes out and says they loves them. They better either level up that "friend" relationship to lovers or make it a professional friendly one. Don't lead them on and don't leave him in the dark.

Yeah, she kind of did.

"Dude I'm 22, I want to date someone who actually has their life together. And I've been laying it on the line for years that I wouldn't date him."

"I don't hang out with him, I've flat-out ignored him in a lot of instances, and I've shot down his offers to even hang out. I'm just sick of him thinking that he's going to "get" anywhere with me when 1) I make it pretty clear I'm not interested 2) I'm already taken and 3) I've made some pretty scathing remarks to him about the shit he says and he brushes it off or forgets it..."

That sounds like closing the door to me.

 

[Composer]

I wouldn't really hold the whole 'no job' thing against him....