yeah this basically, having a child is pretty serious business, it isn't something small like you lie when your say "oh i love your mothers cooking!" or something like that.Cheery Lunatic said:It's only selfish if you're getting serious with someone you know plans on having kids later on life and you don't let him or her know that you don't want kids.
Otherwise, whatever floats your boat.
the ones who are "selfish" are the ones who have the mistake of having children, then dump them off in the system or leave em as a dumpster baby. that's what is selfish above that. there are plenty of safe ways to have sex than using one thin ass rubber each time, not to mention gorging your gravy machine in spermicide.Svenparty said:The ones who have kids are the selfish ones withnall the overpopulation problems etc, also never take your children to posh restaurants and learn your not special for having children parents!
i see absolutely nothing wrong with this, however just curious, if you did make the mistake of having a child un-intentially, would you be "man" enough to try and be a decent father? that is relative of course as to how you think "being a good father" is, but just curious.Diddy_Mao said:I actually don't have kids because I can't think of any non selfish reasons to have them.
I need someone to look after me in my old age, I need to pass on my genetic stock, I need to pass on my legacy...etc etc.
Those just seems like really selfish reasons to bring a new life into the world.
On the flip side I openly agree that the reasons I don't want to have kids are totally selfish.
There are dozens, but they all pretty much boil down to the fact that I don't want to change my behavior to accommodate the needs of an impressionable youngster.
Also, I'd be a terrible father.
I would absolutely to everything I'm able to in order to do what's necessary to make sure the kid is safe, healthy and provided for.gmaverick019 said:i see absolutely nothing wrong with this, however just curious, if you did make the mistake of having a child un-intentially, would you be "man" enough to try and be a decent father? that is relative of course as to how you think "being a good father" is, but just curious.Diddy_Mao said:I actually don't have kids because I can't think of any non selfish reasons to have them.
I need someone to look after me in my old age, I need to pass on my genetic stock, I need to pass on my legacy...etc etc.
Those just seems like really selfish reasons to bring a new life into the world.
On the flip side I openly agree that the reasons I don't want to have kids are totally selfish.
There are dozens, but they all pretty much boil down to the fact that I don't want to change my behavior to accommodate the needs of an impressionable youngster.
Also, I'd be a terrible father.
I personally see a greater selfishness in having children. A lot of this comes down to my own personal issues but if I ever fathered spawn they would probably be disposed to similar ones. I have never enjoyed Life everything has always been pain and hate for as long as I can remember the only thing I kind of enjoy is the company of little people so yes part of me does want to make my own desperately but if I did that then I would be subjecting some poor innocent creature to everything I have been through for the sole purpose of my own meager happiness and s/he would probably end up hating and resenting me for it in the same way that I feel towards my raisers. adoption on the other hand I can so get behind especially considering severe overpopulation in some parts of the world makes even more sense not to make moreVault101 said:yes, I know this is kind of the wrong kind of topic for....well a gaming site (full of people probably less inclined to get excited about babies), but hey Im bored and Ive been thinking of this
now Im going to go out on a limb here and say this gets labelled on you more if you are female, obviously because child rearing has always been "our" thing..but anyway
thing is everything about that statement makes absolutly NO sense to me
1. selfish to WHO exactally? who am I harming in not having a child? who am I benefitting in having a child? both answers: myself...oh and my partner
2. Its more selfish to want to have your own...than..say..adoption, I mean if your thinking of child-rearing as an "anti-selfish" act then why wouldt adoption be your first choice? because its hard..yes, and perhaps because having children can be somthing of an ego-boost in itself (for some peopel, not most) because you want "your own"...obviously its biological but I dont see anything overly altruistic about it
3.Child rearing is a lifestyle choice, is it selfish of me to not have children because I want to pursue my own goals...rather than have children and be a terrible parent because I dont want to give up everything to raise them?
the ony logic I get from this comment is "YOU MUST SUFFER LIKE THE REST OF US" (one of us, one of us, one of us)
ok thats dramatic but still..so
discussion value, have you or somone you know ever encountered this kind of attitude? can you explain why not having kids is somhow selfish/non-selfish? and what do you think about it in general? [/B]
because seriously, I dont get it
At the straw man shop, I believe.Forlong said:Where exactly did you hear this?
Awww - are children being mean?Eccentric Lich said:Besides, children are awful.