So relationships...Why?

Recommended Videos

archvile93

New member
Sep 2, 2009
2,564
0
0
Aris Khandr said:
Eventually, you'll meet a person who makes you truly happy. Someone who makes you feel like a part of you is missing when they're not around. Someone who makes you want to try things you've never considered before. That's why. When it's good, a relationship is like a puzzle. The pieces fit together, and the picture isn't whole otherwise.
I can not ever see that happening to me, though that's probably just me. It likely comes from rarely, if ever, making myself available, a general lack of trust in others, and apathy toward the feelings of others. Maybe I just never understood that whole concept of love, but it just seems like a massive drain of time and resources for the incredibly slim chance the other party will put out months down the line. If I really needed that so badly as to spend thousands on it I could just hire a prostitute where my odds are much better and it's a lot cheaper.
So yeah, to the OP, I never got it either.
 

euro2019

New member
Jan 10, 2011
158
0
0
creager91 said:
Hello fellow escapists. I was wondering what you guys could tell me about relationships and why they are so appealing to you or unappealing. As for myself I have become somewhat of a cynic in the past few years and I feel that relationships are just reasons to induce stress, worry, and jealousy also a colossal waste of money. Now granted I have been asked if I was a...pick up artist I think the term was?

Anywho the point is that I'll admit, ever since my ex left me I kind of became a bit of a player and thus a cynic but enough about me what do you guys think? and also if you feel the need to persuade me otherwise I do try to keep an open mind so fire away
Personally I like the single life and I hate it at the same time. I want a relationship but I don't want the commitment. You get happiness with someone else, but you're also bound to rules. I don't like rules lol.

Mainly since I travel so often and I like to enjoy myself, so I like the friend with benefits situation. The problem with that is trying to find someone up to that, and knowing if you can trust them. I don't sleep around, but if I go to a club or to another country I don't want to have to worry about the whole missing thing, and the whole worrying about staying committed.

L.A is my lady:

<Youtube=13x3pcDRBek>

That's the only relationship I want :p
 

bdcjacko

Gone Fonzy
Jun 9, 2010
2,370
0
0
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
creager91 said:
Just a personal number I guess. It just seems that to me that people tend to get tired of the party and dating scene around this age + or - 2 yers I guess
Some people don't even get into the party and dating scene you know. :p
If I understand creager correctly, and also being older than 25. It is because you don't really know who you are till at least 25.
Some people don't even know who they are when they're 40. Arbitrary numbers.
Now you are just being difficult.
I'm sorry. :p But this is a thread about relationships, which are never easy to understand.

But hey I'm not 25 yet, so what do I know ;)
Well it isn't that you just wake up on your 25th birthday and are changed. But one day you do just start getting tired of only living for you and wondering if their is more.
 

Dragunai

New member
Feb 5, 2007
534
0
0
Relationships are the basic human intinctual desire to find a mate to produce offspring. In protocivilisation this consisted of finding a female (if male) and doing the act with her, the protecting her and the offspring while providing food.

In modern civilisation it is finding a female (if male) and nurturing a relationship for the same reasons as in the proto eras only with the modern reinforcements of marriage thrown in by the christians circa the birth of the religion which was adopted and reinforced by the state before a child you have is legally considered "Shared" else it either belongs to one or the other of its parents.

So there you have it. Its an instinct moulded by each era of society it is found in.

Love however is a chemical reaction caused by dopamine, norepinephrine and phenylethylamine released by the brain when you encounter someone of the opposite (or same) sex (depending on preference) and they are considered by your brain to be the correct defintion of what you find attractive. These chemicals lead to an increased heart rate, flushed skin and sweaty palms and also include the possible side effects of a "high" and excitement.

According to some researchers the mixture of dopamine and norepinephrine cause the following effects in the mind and body:

elation,
intense energy,
sleeplessness,
craving,
loss of appetite and focused attention

All of these traits by anyones defitions are "love"
So No there is no such thing as poetic or "True" love, merely a series of chemical reactions in the human mind that tell us the Person who caused it is an ideal mate with which to have children according to your own preferences and psycholoical conditioning.

...

So...
Yeah...

Have fun with that.
 

creager91

New member
Mar 3, 2011
260
0
0
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
creager91 said:
Just a personal number I guess. It just seems that to me that people tend to get tired of the party and dating scene around this age + or - 2 yers I guess
Some people don't even get into the party and dating scene you know. :p
If I understand creager correctly, and also being older than 25. It is because you don't really know who you are till at least 25.
Some people don't even know who they are when they're 40. Arbitrary numbers.
Now you are just being difficult.
I'm sorry. :p But this is a thread about relationships, which are never easy to understand.

But hey I'm not 25 yet, so what do I know ;)
Well it isn't that you just wake up on your 25th birthday and are changed. But one day you do just start getting tired of only living for you and wondering if their is more.
This is what I meant actually, and seeing as how im 19 Im going to live it up while I can. That is while I have my health, charm, good looks and a desire to party
 

creager91

New member
Mar 3, 2011
260
0
0
Dragunai said:
Relationships are the basic human intinctual desire to find a mate to produce offspring. In protocivilisation this consisted of finding a female (if male) and doing the act with her, the protecting her and the offspring while providing food.

In modern civilisation it is finding a female (if male) and nurturing a relationship for the same reasons as in the proto eras only with the modern reinforcements of marriage thrown in by the christians circa the birth of the religion which was adopted and reinforced by the state before a child you have is legally considered "Shared" else it either belongs to one or the other of its parents.

So there you have it. Its an instinct moulded by each era of society it is found in.

Love however is a chemical reaction caused by dopamine, norepinephrine and phenylethylamine released by the brain when you encounter someone of the opposite (or same) sex (depending on preference) and they are considered by your brain to be the correct defintion of what you find attractive. These chemicals lead to an increased heart rate, flushed skin and sweaty palms and also include the possible side effects of a "high" and excitement.

According to some researchers the mixture of dopamine and norepinephrine cause the following effects in the mind and body:

elation,
intense energy,
sleeplessness,
craving,
loss of appetite and focused attention

All of these traits by anyones defitions are "love"
So No there is no such thing as poetic or "True" love, merely a series of chemical reactions in the human mind that tell us the Person who caused it is an ideal mate with which to have children according to your own preferences and psycholoical conditioning.

...

So...
Yeah...

Have fun with that.
Thus reinforcing my belief that love is merely cognitive dissonance
 

Vern5

New member
Mar 3, 2011
1,633
0
0
You know what? I actually enjoy being alone. Yet I'm also in a happy relationship. See, it's nice to be on your own but sometimes, a change of pace is nice. Also, I don't really care about myself so I end up putting all of my efforts towards making her happy and she does the same for me. It's nice to be useful to somebody.
 

bdcjacko

Gone Fonzy
Jun 9, 2010
2,370
0
0
creager91 said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
creager91 said:
Just a personal number I guess. It just seems that to me that people tend to get tired of the party and dating scene around this age + or - 2 yers I guess
Some people don't even get into the party and dating scene you know. :p
If I understand creager correctly, and also being older than 25. It is because you don't really know who you are till at least 25.
Some people don't even know who they are when they're 40. Arbitrary numbers.
Now you are just being difficult.
I'm sorry. :p But this is a thread about relationships, which are never easy to understand.

But hey I'm not 25 yet, so what do I know ;)
Well it isn't that you just wake up on your 25th birthday and are changed. But one day you do just start getting tired of only living for you and wondering if their is more.
This is what I meant actually, and seeing as how im 19 Im going to live it up while I can. That is while I have my health, charm, good looks and a desire to party
Good attitude. Enjoy it while you can, because sooner or later you just get tired of it, and all you want to do is come home at relax and not worry about making it to the party. Also one day you realize you only have space in your wallet for a condom or an antacid and you know the antacid is going to be more useful.
 

Rayne870

New member
Nov 28, 2010
1,250
0
0
I enjoy having someone who shares like interests and a like mind but also interjects their differing opinions and gives me a different insight into the things into my life. It's just really cool having someone that you care about and deeply cares about you and you both shape each-others lives and experiences.

Also it is really nice to have someone cook a meal for you so that it is ready when you get home from work, and also return the favor.
 

creager91

New member
Mar 3, 2011
260
0
0
bdcjacko said:
creager91 said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
creager91 said:
Just a personal number I guess. It just seems that to me that people tend to get tired of the party and dating scene around this age + or - 2 yers I guess
Some people don't even get into the party and dating scene you know. :p
If I understand creager correctly, and also being older than 25. It is because you don't really know who you are till at least 25.
Some people don't even know who they are when they're 40. Arbitrary numbers.
Now you are just being difficult.
I'm sorry. :p But this is a thread about relationships, which are never easy to understand.

But hey I'm not 25 yet, so what do I know ;)
Well it isn't that you just wake up on your 25th birthday and are changed. But one day you do just start getting tired of only living for you and wondering if their is more.
This is what I meant actually, and seeing as how im 19 Im going to live it up while I can. That is while I have my health, charm, good looks and a desire to party
Good attitude. Enjoy it while you can, because sooner or later you just get tired of it, and all you want to do is come home at relax and not worry about making it to the party. Also one day you realize you only have space in your wallet for a condom or an antacid and you know the antacid is going to be more useful.
Lol never thought about the antacid with my metabolism but ill keep that in mind, and also Do women really care if a guy has a condom or not? cuz my usual excuse is...would you rather I dont have one when things get to that point?
 

bdcjacko

Gone Fonzy
Jun 9, 2010
2,370
0
0
creager91 said:
bdcjacko said:
creager91 said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
creager91 said:
Just a personal number I guess. It just seems that to me that people tend to get tired of the party and dating scene around this age + or - 2 yers I guess
Some people don't even get into the party and dating scene you know. :p
If I understand creager correctly, and also being older than 25. It is because you don't really know who you are till at least 25.
Some people don't even know who they are when they're 40. Arbitrary numbers.
Now you are just being difficult.
I'm sorry. :p But this is a thread about relationships, which are never easy to understand.

But hey I'm not 25 yet, so what do I know ;)
Well it isn't that you just wake up on your 25th birthday and are changed. But one day you do just start getting tired of only living for you and wondering if their is more.
This is what I meant actually, and seeing as how im 19 Im going to live it up while I can. That is while I have my health, charm, good looks and a desire to party
Good attitude. Enjoy it while you can, because sooner or later you just get tired of it, and all you want to do is come home at relax and not worry about making it to the party. Also one day you realize you only have space in your wallet for a condom or an antacid and you know the antacid is going to be more useful.
Lol never thought about the antacid with my metabolism but ill keep that in mind, and also Do women really care if a guy has a condom or not? cuz my usual excuse is...would you rather I dont have one when things get to that point?
i don't know if metobolism has anything to do with heartburn. I nevered carried a condom because of the girls wishes. I carried one so if it was a one night stand, I wouldn't have to see her again, if you get my meaning.
 

creager91

New member
Mar 3, 2011
260
0
0
bdcjacko said:
creager91 said:
bdcjacko said:
creager91 said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
creager91 said:
Just a personal number I guess. It just seems that to me that people tend to get tired of the party and dating scene around this age + or - 2 yers I guess
Some people don't even get into the party and dating scene you know. :p
If I understand creager correctly, and also being older than 25. It is because you don't really know who you are till at least 25.
Some people don't even know who they are when they're 40. Arbitrary numbers.
Now you are just being difficult.
I'm sorry. :p But this is a thread about relationships, which are never easy to understand.

But hey I'm not 25 yet, so what do I know ;)
Valid point lol, Ima be honest, even though I am a player I'm also a virgin which according to my best friend makes me the worst kind of player (my best friend is a girl and the one who told me I was a player haha) Im the guy that just messes with a girls mind then im done with them, according to her
Well it isn't that you just wake up on your 25th birthday and are changed. But one day you do just start getting tired of only living for you and wondering if their is more.
This is what I meant actually, and seeing as how im 19 Im going to live it up while I can. That is while I have my health, charm, good looks and a desire to party
Good attitude. Enjoy it while you can, because sooner or later you just get tired of it, and all you want to do is come home at relax and not worry about making it to the party. Also one day you realize you only have space in your wallet for a condom or an antacid and you know the antacid is going to be more useful.
Lol never thought about the antacid with my metabolism but ill keep that in mind, and also Do women really care if a guy has a condom or not? cuz my usual excuse is...would you rather I dont have one when things get to that point?
i don't know if metobolism has anything to do with heartburn. I nevered carried a condom because of the girls wishes. I carried one so if it was a one night stand, I wouldn't have to see her again, if you get my meaning.
 

Nimcha

New member
Dec 6, 2010
2,383
0
0
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
creager91 said:
Just a personal number I guess. It just seems that to me that people tend to get tired of the party and dating scene around this age + or - 2 yers I guess
Some people don't even get into the party and dating scene you know. :p
If I understand creager correctly, and also being older than 25. It is because you don't really know who you are till at least 25.
Some people don't even know who they are when they're 40. Arbitrary numbers.
Now you are just being difficult.
I'm sorry. :p But this is a thread about relationships, which are never easy to understand.

But hey I'm not 25 yet, so what do I know ;)
Well it isn't that you just wake up on your 25th birthday and are changed. But one day you do just start getting tired of only living for you and wondering if their is more.
I've already realized what 'more' there is, and I prefer living for myself. :p

My girlfriend agrees with me on that!
 

bdcjacko

Gone Fonzy
Jun 9, 2010
2,370
0
0
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
creager91 said:
Just a personal number I guess. It just seems that to me that people tend to get tired of the party and dating scene around this age + or - 2 yers I guess
Some people don't even get into the party and dating scene you know. :p
If I understand creager correctly, and also being older than 25. It is because you don't really know who you are till at least 25.
Some people don't even know who they are when they're 40. Arbitrary numbers.
Now you are just being difficult.
I'm sorry. :p But this is a thread about relationships, which are never easy to understand.

But hey I'm not 25 yet, so what do I know ;)
Well it isn't that you just wake up on your 25th birthday and are changed. But one day you do just start getting tired of only living for you and wondering if their is more.
I've already realized what 'more' there is, and I prefer living for myself. :p

My girlfriend agrees with me on that!
k, just to be clear, I was using you in the broader sense, not a personal sense. I'm not saying anything about you personally.

Now from what I understand you are a girl and have a girlfriend. I'm from missouri, the show me state. So I need to see pictures or else it didn't happen.
 

Fetzenfisch

New member
Sep 11, 2009
2,454
0
0
Jealousy isnt the biproduct of relationships, but of weak insecure individuals that dont honestly trust their partners, or the fact that one of you cant keep the fidelity, both tells me there is no reason to have a relationship at all.

Either you can happily trust each other, or leave it be.
 

P0RTAL

New member
Jan 17, 2011
326
0
0
I'm also usually pretty cynical about relationships and true love and all that. I've only ever had one crush before I dragged myself down to a realistic view. Watch out because I'm about to delve into the "crazy cat lady" state. I beleive that you should at least always have one person in your life that you can truly care for and take care of. I think it's healthy to have at least one person or thing you would be willing to risk your health or comfort to protect. Maybe that thing isn't a person. Maybe it's a cat and you can be called a crazy cat man or maybe it's a dog (in which case you would just be regarded as a loyal dog owner) Although I don't imagine you as much of a cat or dog person so I hope that you do find someone to care for.
 

creager91

New member
Mar 3, 2011
260
0
0
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
creager91 said:
Just a personal number I guess. It just seems that to me that people tend to get tired of the party and dating scene around this age + or - 2 yers I guess
Some people don't even get into the party and dating scene you know. :p
If I understand creager correctly, and also being older than 25. It is because you don't really know who you are till at least 25.
Some people don't even know who they are when they're 40. Arbitrary numbers.
Now you are just being difficult.
I'm sorry. :p But this is a thread about relationships, which are never easy to understand.

But hey I'm not 25 yet, so what do I know ;)
Well it isn't that you just wake up on your 25th birthday and are changed. But one day you do just start getting tired of only living for you and wondering if their is more.
I've already realized what 'more' there is, and I prefer living for myself. :p

My girlfriend agrees with me on that!
k, just to be clear, I was using you in the broader sense, not a personal sense. I'm not saying anything about you personally.

Now from what I understand you are a girl and have a girlfriend. I'm from missouri, the show me state. So I need to see pictures or else it didn't happen.
Dude trust me from most lesbians I know if she is a she then you likely dont want to see it lol
 

bdcjacko

Gone Fonzy
Jun 9, 2010
2,370
0
0
creager91 said:
Dude trust me from most lesbians I know if she is a she then you likely dont want to see it lol
Look bro, I'm like any dude. You know, once you see one chick, you want to see them all.
 

Nimcha

New member
Dec 6, 2010
2,383
0
0
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
bdcjacko said:
Nimcha said:
creager91 said:
Just a personal number I guess. It just seems that to me that people tend to get tired of the party and dating scene around this age + or - 2 yers I guess
Some people don't even get into the party and dating scene you know. :p
If I understand creager correctly, and also being older than 25. It is because you don't really know who you are till at least 25.
Some people don't even know who they are when they're 40. Arbitrary numbers.
Now you are just being difficult.
I'm sorry. :p But this is a thread about relationships, which are never easy to understand.

But hey I'm not 25 yet, so what do I know ;)
Well it isn't that you just wake up on your 25th birthday and are changed. But one day you do just start getting tired of only living for you and wondering if their is more.
I've already realized what 'more' there is, and I prefer living for myself. :p

My girlfriend agrees with me on that!
k, just to be clear, I was using you in the broader sense, not a personal sense. I'm not saying anything about you personally.

Now from what I understand you are a girl and have a girlfriend. I'm from missouri, the show me state. So I need to see pictures or else it didn't happen.
I know, I know. My point is just that I think it's impossible to define an age after which relationships are actually meaningful, or something like that. I think whether a relationship is worthy or not is only subjective.

And shame on you for asking for pictures, shaaame!
 

bdcjacko

Gone Fonzy
Jun 9, 2010
2,370
0
0
Nimcha said:
I know, I know. My point is just that I think it's impossible to define an age after which relationships are actually meaningful, or something like that. I think whether a relationship is worthy or not is only subjective.

And shame on you for asking for pictures, shaaame!
Well if you want a dead certain age, then yes, it is impossible. But if you just want to give and average of when most people pull their heads out of their asses, then now.

And I was just kidding with pictures.