So relationships...Why?

[deleted_by_strongbad]

As other have pointed out, everyone who is well adjusted and/or properly matured must be in a relationship, romantic love is everyone's eventual fate, BELIEVE IT, our social order depends on it . You don't want to die alone do you?

I think solid, committed, relationships are great for the right people, and terrible for others. Experiment with both, figure out what works for you and run with it.

Should you choose to get into a relationship though, do both you and the other person a favor and don't do it because you don't want to be alone, do it because you actually want to be with the other person. Alternatively, should you choose against it, do yourself a favor and don't choose that because there is less opportunity for pain. Either one of those options sells yourself short.

 

[thom_cat_]

If you find someone who makes you truly happy why not?

 

[VaudevillianVeteran]

A relationship is...well, something great. Falling for someone that you like both physically and personality wise, while just being able to spend time with them without caring about what you're actually doing. Yes, they aren't for everyone and a lot of them are shallow and only about physical stuff.
I reckon that a true relationship is just being dedicated to someone completely while learning about yourself too.

 

[Dogstile]

Because they're fun.

Also, let people know you're only looking for one offs if you really want to. Or that you don't mind being friends with benefits, if you don't want emotional stress.

But to be fair, if you don't want any sort of emotional stress, why do you even talk to people in the first place?

 

[Lucifron]

Sex. Relationships are all about having a readily available source for sex.
Cynical? Maybe. But true.
Anyway I know I will never meet someone who I want to spend every single day with. That to me is the true killer of relationships. Successful relationships are built on both parties having time away from the other to be themselves.
... and sex.

You're speaking in much too general terms, John.

 

[Alexias_Sandar]

Really? It can vary a lot from person to person. For me? I'll say that my time with my spouse is...wonderful. Sure, sometimes we disagree...but we still love each other, and know that. The emotional and physical intimacy and having someone you truly trust...are quite nice. And sex with someone who you love and who loves you...is really nice. Still, it's the emotional bond that's more important.

 

[AVATAR_RAGE]

It's about finding someone who you share common interests with and want to spend time with just because they are who they are, not what they have or what they can do (nudge, nudge). Any relationship has it's ups and downs, stresses but if you care you can look past that.

I have been going out with a girl for about a year now, will I be with her next year? I don't know, I really hope so. We like to spend time with each other instead of money on each other, which is kind of the complete opposite of what I heard relationships would be like. (in fact I have a friend who spends on average £60 on a 1st date with women who he rarely continues a relationship with).

I think the point I am trying to make is that it is all about luck, you may find that special someone, you may not. Just don't burn all of you're bridges.

 

[BringBackBuck]

im 19

So you're a 19 year old male who doesn't want to be in a relationship and would rather be playing the field?

You're 19. That's how you are supposed to think. Exactly what is the problem here?

 

[Mr Somewhere]

It offers a whole sense of safety, a layer of confidence, you get somebody you can always rely on and you rarely feel alone. You have another mind to confide in, it offers intimacy and is always a sense of inspiration.
I guess it makes you feel content.

 

[Griffolion]

Man, isn't love a nice feeling? I'm seriously suspicious that I am, at the moment, watching the air leak from a five year relationship with, oh yes, my first love. I feel no compulsion to plug the hole.

Relationships are about learning: about emotion and sex, about the other person and what makes them, them; and also about maybe fitting into the world as part of a stable unit that can withstand catastrophe.

Or it could just be about sex, which it probably is. Once the sex is gone, the whole thing's shot to hell, which leads me to think that it was the only reason for all of it in the first place...but I'm biased this morning. I have literally never been more cynical about love than I am today.

I do miss it, though.

Love sometimes isn't a nice feeling. At times it can be pains most excruciating manifestation.

A lot of people have said that the magic gets lost when the sex is lost. It's kinda obvious really because sex is the physical act of the intimacy you feel in the heart. You lose that, you may as well be two strangers...

I'd love to be with someone, but whoever i find has just gotten out of something and doesn't want anything, or has some other reason for not wanting something. I'm beginning to think it might be me...

 

[gazumped]

You know how people in really good relationships say "They're not just my partner, they're my best friend, too"?
That's what a good relationship really is. It's not about being able to say "I have a partner, I get laid", it's about having one person who you get on with crazy good, and so you WANT to spend most of your time and effort into your relationship, and you have good sex because you're so damn into each other that you want to be as connected as possible.

Although closeness + sex doesn't equal a perfect relationship. I did once have a 'friends with benefits' situation with my then best friend but he wasn't that crazy about me so it was never anything official.
And he wanted to be able to sleep with other girls. Although if you're both cool with it, being in a relationship doesn't mean you can't sleep with other people, of course. (I wasn't, though. )

 

[creager91]

I'm the same way, I was in a 3 year relationship, I saw a future, marriage, living together.
She told me she wanted all those things to, even before I thought I wanted them and I believed her. I started to believe in love and sure I wasn't Prince Charming, I wasn't the most romantic, I am kind of a delinquent, plus I was lazy and a procrastinator. She wasn't perfect either, are many differences caused us to fight alot, which I ALWAYS had to fix, because it was my fault all the time apperently. I said with her through all of it though caused I loved her more then anything else. When are three year aniversary came close she dumped me saying she wasn't happy anymore, a few days later she was dateing her bestfriend, who had just dumped his girlfriend...in short she left me for another guy.

So fuck relationships, and I hope I never fall in love again, if it does happen I'll fight it!

Since i've been single ive made a bunch of friends that I just couldn't when I was with her, I feel more free and i'm starting to get stress free *I'm still healing from the breakup, it was only a month ago*

Losing her was the worst feeling I have ever experienced, for someone to not be in love with you in the blink of an eye when all your feelings are still very much strong for her.
That is why I think it just isn't worth it. Serious relationships are a complete waste of time seeing as how they usually all fail and people get hurt and damaged. Thats just my opinion though...there are those cases of people celebrating there 50 year ani, I just don't think i'll ever see that, or I don't know if I would want to try again.

I feel ya brother, my ex is currently a model, so i get the horrible pleasure of knowing that she will always have 100 guys to choose from, and shes not one of those models the show off clothes, she has womanly features and all that. Then again I do take comfort in being her first ex that was a straight guy before and after the relationship.

im 19

So you're a 19 year old male who doesn't want to be in a relationship and would rather be playing the field?

You're 19. That's how you are supposed to think. Exactly what is the problem here?

Never said it wasnt, I just stated my opinion on them and asked for everyone elses opinion and said if youd like you can try and persuade me, I didn't make this into the intervention topic it became lol im actually quite happy with my "player" status

Also for those of you that keep saying its for the sex....really? because two people have never had sex w/out being in a relationship? really? and also I have my best friends to confide in, girl [insert name here] to cuddle with and sleep with, as far as I see it I have everything that a relationship is supposed to be, im just not looking for it in one person. I honestly feel like relationships anymore are a product of the media we see it so much growing up that we think its what were supposed to do.

 

[aegix drakan_v1legacy]

Speaking as someone who recently entered a relationship...

It's nice. It's nice to have a girl that makes you happy, and you can make her happy, just by being together. Plus, she's also a great friend. We still do all the stuff we did as friends (including lots of gaming), but now we have something else as well.

Personally, the only downside is that I start missing her pretty bad, even though we saw each other the day before!

 

[Trogdor1138]

You'll know why when the time comes

Everybody is going to break your heart in the end, it's about finding the ones that are worth the pain.

 

[Fappy]

I don't feel like I'm wasting my time if someone can shift my mood from sad to happy with a simple smile. >.<

 

[Zaik]

People want sex, but there's a stigma on being promiscuous, so relationships were created to be a ritual involving undue stress and annoyance on both parties in order to have guilt free sex.

 

[^=ash=^]

It beats being alone

This, having someone to commit to is lovely ... I want that feeling again :/

xxx

 

[Kris015]

Eventually, you'll meet a person who makes you truly happy. Someone who makes you feel like a part of you is missing when they're not around. Someone who makes you want to try things you've never considered before. That's why. When it's good, a relationship is like a puzzle. The pieces fit together, and the picture isn't whole otherwise.

That's fucking deep. But true, very true.

 

[Brian Hendershot]

Cause its nice to know there is someone who is always there for you if need them. And yes I realize your mother or someone like that might possibly fill that void in your life, but I ask you this. Can your mother cook for you AND satisfy you sexually? Please GOD let the answer be no.

Also, the getting to know someone is nice. I mean it sounds weird, but its nice to let someone get to know you. Let them see the part of you that no one else sees and then watch as they accept that part of you and even love it. That's always nice.

EDIT: I have always thought of it like this. There are two types of people in the world. People you wanna marry and people you wanna fuck. When you find a girl you wanna marry, hold on to her and don't let go. Cause in the words of the over quoted Bob Marley, "The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for."

 

[bdcjacko]

Cause getting some tang on the wang feels great. And not having to pay cash money up front only makes it sweeter.

Plus I guess companionship and having someone there for you is nice too.