So you're feeling a little horny...

[Bealzibob]

I look down at my crusty old condom ring and remember the drunken vow I took before the Devil... and then I cheat spontaneously with the nearest living creature.

or you know I do what normal people do and sit in the shower crying, scrubbing till the dirty goes away.

 

[umpufnufguf]

why is everyone using childish names like "one-hand happy time" just say wank, no-one cares...

OT: i just wait, i see my girlfriend a lot so i might as well hang on.

 

[tharglet]

why is everyone using childish names like "one-hand happy time" just say wank, no-one cares...

Who decided "wank" was "the" word? Imo the most non-euphemistic word is "masturbate".
Also "one-hand-happy-time" can cover females as well as males, whereas "wank" doesn't .

For me, I usually suppress it, tho if I'm somewhere where I can ponder undisturbed, I'll start daydreaming.

 

[binvjoh]

Depends on how awkward a boner would be in the immediate area.

 

[DudeistBelieve]

Hey girls can have dildos, so why not?

 

[Sangreal Gothcraft]

call a few of my female friends and after a quick nobbing my urges should go away. usually they die when they say "I love you" so that kinda kills it for me.

 

[joshuaayt]

I don't want to resort to masturbation, huh? I guess I'm in my guilt phase. Well, I suppose I'd employ my standard response to this kind of issue- play a non-japanese videogame.

Yeah, Japanese games always seem to work on me in ways they shouldn't. Worse, they are among the only thing that does. I can be with a nekkid captain fabulous, and I won't feel a thing. Scout rushing with Ramona in Valkyria Chronicles, however? "I'll make this look gooood"

I bet you will, Ramona. I bet you will.

 

[TilMorrow]

"The force is strong, but control you must have."

Yea... *walks away*

 

[infohippie]

Why suppress it? I own a razor, and I can buy glasses if I need to.

 

[Amethyst Wind]

I usually watch the news, or just let my mind reach its natural progression of providing me a question to answer.

Sorts it out, but honestly I usually engage in hand-to-gland combat, I do the other stuff when I'm not far removed from said combat and don't wish to do it again so soon.

 

[alimination602]

I do advanced calculas while listening to '101 Greatest Speeches from Margret Thatcher'- problem solved. I challenge you to find me someone who can maintain a boner after 2 hours of that. Even when the infinity sign kind of reminds you of breasts...

 

[Jonluw]

Since I'm as single as can be, I'll either ignore it if it is a situation where I can't masturbate, or I have a wank. What other options are there?

Edit: Seriously people. Are so many of you thinking that there's something wrong with satisfying your urges? "I have self control, so I don't masturbate" What? That's the silliest thing I've heard in a long time.

 

[Jonluw]

Why suppress it? I own a razor, and I can buy glasses if I need to.

Am... am I missing something? Do you pleasure yourself with a razor?

 

[Lionsfan1986]

Well, the options would be..

1) Play with myself.
2) Call up my lover and moan in the phone / headset.
3) See the other options.
4) Ignore my urges.

Minus 2-4!

 

[beer_nuts]

just picture your own mother and father gettin freaky.

 

[silasbufu]

I think about pulling out teeth, it gets me every time

I will try that tonight!

I just go on the internet and occupy my mind some other way.

Wow that sounds difficult, there's porn everywhere you look.

 

[LiftYourSkinnyFists]

What do you do? What if your loved one isn't present and you don't want to resort to one-hand happy time? Do you suppress it or actively search out a way to satisfy your little urge?

The internet is for porn FOR POOOORN!


That's all.

 

[garfoldsomeoneelse]

Please explain to me why I wouldn't want to resort to one-hand happy time.

But for the sake of contribution, I'll say that if I was horny and couldn't wank, I'll go for a run, or spend some time at the gun range. Most of my ambition is derived from the same pool of energy, so if I expend it on something else, the desire goes away. Mostly.

 

[Outright Villainy]

Is this a real concern? Whether or not it's ok to masturbate when your lover isn't around? Apparently this means some of you think that having sex with yourself is cheating, to which I reply that you are all idiots.

I know a girl who said she fond it weird if her boyfriend would do that. She also said she never did it herself.

So yeah, there are some weird people around it seems...

 

[MasterOfWorlds]

I just relax and start doing other things. I'm not going to ruin my relationship with my gf just because I'm feeling horny and she's not around, and I'm not really one for one night stands anyway. If I can't beat it, I get around it by occupying my mind with other things, like raping face in one of my games or reading, or working out, or even something as crazy as doing something productive. XD