Tell Gearbox Why You Hated Duke Nukem Forever

[Callate]

It's not a very good survey, sadly. "Do you like fast paced action? And tongue-in-cheek humor? And non-linear levels?"

Um, well, yeah... But I don't want "fast paced action" to be interpreted as "you're going to die every fifteen minutes and then spend as much time loading", and I don't want "tongue-in-cheek humor" to be interpreted as "throw away all semblance of character, plot, and dialogue for the sake of cheap gags", and if "non-linear levels" is just going to mean I spend an extra half an hour trying to figure out where the next trigger point to progress is, I'd rather have a well-constructed linear level.

Also, while I don't really object to gore or nudity, I'd much prefer they'd be used in service of something rather than like the joke of the kind of comedian who wants you to feel threatened if you aren't willing to laugh at something you find distasteful.

 

[ItsAChiaotzu]

but you'll also be entered into a drawing to win some Duke Nukem swag. So you've got that going for you.

Not being picky (well, I am) but "drawing"? Am I missing something here? "Draw" surely? (Though it does say Drawing on the survey as well)

Yes, drawing. That's what it's called. So, surely not "draw", at least not on this side of the pond.

No need to be snide about it.

Anyway, I don't really have anything to say about Duke Nukem having not played it.

 

[Get_A_Grip_]

Where do I get to complain about the terrible texture popin and the horrilby floaty contols and the lack of weapons that pack a real punch and the fucking inconsistent frame rate that ranges anywhere between 2 and 30 in a firefight. Gearbox, I hope you're reading this.

 

[Draconalis]

The survey is a joke. I didn't get to voice ANY of my real concerns with the game.

I think it's a sequel viability scam, as the article speculates.

 

[jacobythehedgehog]

That survey was better then Duke Nukem Forever... and that's saying a lot because that survey was a waste of time

 

[Draconalis]

That is probably one of the worst cases of butchering the english language that I have ever seen.

Never heard Ebonics, have you?

 

[Ulquiorra4sama]

I really feel like an odd one out whenever DNF is brought up because i actually enjoyed the game a lot. It might be because i never played any of the previous ones so i don't know what his character is "supposed" to be like, but still...

Yeah, sure the 2 weapon rule sucked pretty bad, but having lots of inventory space these days isn't very common from what i can see. Bulletstorm let you have three weapons at a time, but for some of the weapons ammo was scarce so i ended up using the sniper rifle and shotgun through most of the game after they became available.

 

[shogunblade]

I did the survey, and it was rather lacking.

I think it's incredibly sad to say, but I would have loved to have written the script. Give me two weeks, and I could have come up with less than a third of a script, and it would have been better than Half of the writing within the game.

That being said, I'd do it for free, no questions asked.

Side note: If a sequel was made with Duke Nukem (I don't know how you surpass DNF: Forever's title), would anyone play it? Because I know I would.

 

[Atmos Duality]

A survey? Fuck that.
If you want to address specific issues (qualitative) don't just use a numbers rubric (quantitative) to get them; get comments (qualitative) instead.

Yes, it's more work, but it's far more accurate.

Spoiler: Ala carte' Commentary

-Problem/Cause-
[Effect]
*Comments/Justification*

1-Hyper Linear Level Design-
1[Gimps that element of exploration and scope]
1*Duke3D had some truly fun/interesting level design. They weren't strictly-linear (it did follow some linearity), and allowed for a degree of exploration. Regenerating Health contributes to this case a bit, but you can still work in secret areas, alternate routes and Easter eggs even with that element in place.*

2-Two Weapon Limit-
[Gimped arsenal]
*Is it too much to ask for access to more than just two guns at a time? You don't have to go back to the 10(12) weapon mega-arsenal, but you can stop doing this stupid Halo-shuffle nonsense. Having access to at least two workhorse weapons, a heavy/big stick, and a special slot adds a level of strategy to the game without having to do the "Dead guy Gun Shuffle". Everything else was fine in execution (quick pipe bombs, pills, holoduke)*

3-No Mighty Boot-
[No Mighty Boot]
*The quick-hit melee attack we all loved. Kick in the door, shoot the dudes, and curb-stomp the survivors in real time baby. There's just something...RIGHT about planting your size 16 boot into an alien's face compared to the usual pistol-whip and quick-knifing*

 

[GeorgW]

I took the survey. It was completely worthless, I have a lot to say about DNF, and I actually liked it. It definitely needs to improve on things, and this would have been a great opportunity. If the questions weren't so general and worthless. If only they'd let us submit a comment, I'd have given them this. [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/326.291283-Hypnotic-reviews-Duke-Nukem-Forever]

 

[Iron Lightning]

I don't want to do the survey in case I win the Duke swag.

Well, fortunately entering the drawing is optional.

More on Topic: I took the survey, it was way too short. I was hoping to write an essay telling Gearbox exactly what was wrong with Duke Nukem Forever but they didn't even have a comments section.

 

[Sonic Doctor]

Just took the survey. It's literally 5 generic questions. I'd be surprised if they got any usable data at all.

The only possible helpful question for them is the one on the list at the end that asked how much I liked non-linear gameplay.

At least that might tell them that people wanted the classic non-linear maps style to be a part of the game.

I find it suspect that they didn't allow a comments section. If they really wanted to improve upon the game or and upcoming DN game, then they should have had a comments section.

That way they couldn't avoid the glaring problems they didn't put in question form, like the bull-crap 2 weapon limit and the regen-health instead of health packs.

They call that A Survey? Make us write an Essay dammit!

They don't wan constructive criticism, obviously. They just wanted to pull out the token unhelpful type of survey, so that the next time people blast the next game like they did DNF, they will blame it on us because we didn't take their survey or answer it correctly to get what we wanted.

 

[Sonic Doctor]

Surely every answer will be

1) More than two weapons
2) No regenerating health
3) No chest-high walls
4) No Auto-aim
5) More penis drawing.

C'mon: Serious Sam and Saints Row do Duke far better than Gearbox even aspired to.

Surely you speak only for yourself and not for everyone else.
I wouldn't mind if the next iteration of Duke was more like Bulletstorm for example, and bulletstorm has several of those things.


My one complaint regarding the survey is that there was no comment box.

If they want to bring back classic Duke Nukem, which is what real fans were expecting from DNF, then they have to take out the two weapon limit and allow us to carry all guns, remove the regen-health and put in only health packs, chest walls gone so that the player can only survive by dodging rounds and ducking around corners, and yes, no auto-aim so we can bring back skill to shooters. There is no skill in me pressing a button and my gun sight velcros to the next enemy, making shooting them a cakewalk.

 

[Corporal Yakob]

"Did you play Duke Nukem Forever?" Nope-goodbye! For what it was worth I did the rest of the survey and I think that has zero worth.

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

Surely you speak only for yourself and not for everyone else.

I do, and don't call me Shirley.

I wouldn't mind if the next iteration of Duke was more like Bulletstorm for example, and bulletstorm has several of those things.

That's why I deleted Bulletstorm from my hard-drive after two minutes play. Revolting tosh.

 

[Sonic Doctor]

Snip

It's a lot easier to process data as it's presented in that form than to have someone read an interpret a thousand "essays" from different people. That being said I wish the survey did include a comment box with a limited character count so people could articulate their biggest gripe or desire towards future iterations.

As I said they don't want constructive criticism. And again the only question that would be helpful for them is the one about nonlinear gameplay.

That was only one of the reason why DNF failed. They didn't even put in questions about the biggest problems, the two weapon limit, and the regen-health.

They didn't do that because they have their fingers in their ears going, "La la la la, not listening, not listening," because they believe that having 10 guns at once and only health packs can't work in this day and age of gaming. They are wrong.