The Customer Is Always Wrong

Logan Keller

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Jul 24, 2008
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Reaperman Wompa post=18.70218.684936 said:
Portkins post=18.70218.684923 said:
So.. I'm assuming Woolsworth is the equivalence of all American businesses, most commonly 'Wal Mart'?
Kind of. But they don't sell as much.
You have to kind of look at the entire company behind it which is conveniently called Woolworths Limited which has a LOT of tentacles. And we should not continue this.
 

SenseOfTumour

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Jul 11, 2008
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I'm not vent some of the idiocy I've dealt with just yet, but damn...

Surely the answer for all these companies, is give your staff more power to refuse service, or at least allow your manager to own some balls when it comes to dealing with idiot customers.

I used to get sick of refusing to help someone who was clearly taking the piss, trying to con us, then he'd demand the manager, who would come over all smiles and immediately just do whatever the customer asked.

Really, in my experience the really bad customers were more 1% than 99%, and I think it would help the company in general if they just let staff refuse them, or let management say 'no' sometimes. That brand of customers are usually just seeing how much free stuff they can get because of their 'rights', so screw em, send em somewhere else, and once they're getting refused at every store, maybe they'll have to treat the staff in a vaguely human way to get their food.

Anyway rant over, and sorry its not more amusing tales of idiocy, sure someone will fill in for me below tho.
 

Sixties Spidey

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Jan 24, 2008
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I know so many friends of mine who worked at a starbucks in Canada, or at least my brother does anyway, that had to deal with stupid consumers. This happened on the day that the last Twilight Book released.

There was this group of girls around my age (14-15) and they were your typical bimbo girls-that-dressed-like-french-tards, and judging by how they talked, they were obviously extremely hyper, and/or most likely had an IQ of 40 (the only thing i heard them talk about was Jonas brothers, Hannah Montana, basic teeny bopper bullshit). So they went up and the girl was like, may i have an Americano Frappuncino, and the guy behind the register (my brothers friend) was like, "....sorry we dont have that" and she kept going with the same order OVER AND OVER for three times.

Then the girl who obviously was obviously the leader of the pack was like, thats enough, we'll take 4 mocha frappuchinos medium. I can tell he wanted to curbstomp em, and he wanted to tell them its a grande. So he did the drinks and gave the drinks to the harpies, and the girl said, "you're hot" and did a kiss blow to them and they just giggled away. I don't know if they are stupid... or if they were hyper. One things for sure, they fail at life.
 

Cyclomega

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Jul 28, 2008
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Just my two cents, the outlandish coffee and size names at Starbucks are obnoxious enough to my taste that it deserves some trolling once in a while...

An anecdote on the other side of the counter, I like going to Starbucks sometimes, although it's expensive, and I ordered this time my usual XL coffee of the week (venti for you purists), and a raspberry cheesecake. They forgot to charge the cheese cake and lost half of the order (I was with friends), and we learned it was the barista's first day.
Funny thing, every time I went there they were training new people, who messed up all the time.
Bored with what seemed like a deja-vu overdose, I simply asked for my cake when they gave me my coffee, and my friend asked for his blueberry muffin.
The guy asked us why we were asking for it there, we simply said we were not given our pastries at the cashier, he called for them and we got'em free for once. It was cool.
 

Blayze

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Dec 19, 2007
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I work for my local council. We stopped selling broken paving slabs years ago. We recycle them now. The number of times some customer's called asking to buy some for their crazy paving and *not* understood when I've explained "No, we don't sell them any more"...

It's almost as stupid as when they ring up for sandbags every time it rains. The only time anyone in the borough's ever needed sandbags was when a dam burst or something stupid a good part of the country away.

But nothing can top the idiots who ring up for somebody, complain when I tell them that they're out on site, say "It's not good enough!" and threaten to send a letter to the Mayor (A right tosser, but nevertheless his office must destroy countless stupid letters every week).
 

NinjaSkills

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Jul 5, 2008
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Oh, man where to start...

OK got one, actually a whole bunch.

I used to work at a pet store. And the customers that annoy me most is the people who buy dogs and can't seem to understand the fucking contract. Like this one lady came in and bought a cockerpoo, she came back saying that the dog is a schnauser (I don't know how to spell it I'll edit it later) and that she wants her money back and wants to keep the dog. It doesn't work like that you dumbass is basically what my boss told her. And she complained to the paper about it.
 

bp1986

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Sep 1, 2008
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The pricing to a "You pick 2" is posted with a base price, a price with 1 signature item, and a price with 2 signature items. For salads and sandwiches, it is clearly marked with a size 80+ font in bold CAFE and SIGNATURE items. Yet I get questions about this all the time.

Also, I cannot stress this enough... it is a "You pick 2"... NOT 3! Yet people try to order it like that all the time. When it has the text under it, it is simply telling you that those are the 3 options to choose from, but you only get 2!

Also, to a lesser note... my store consists of roughly 60% windows and about 35% counter top for retail (visible borders of the room) and yet people still fail to see the one remaining place to look when trying to find the restroom.


Oh yea, I had this customer call up about 30 mins before closing time, she wanted like $60 worth of food and wanted me to type in her credit card info over the phone (keep in mind, we don't normally take credit cards over the phone). Now, since I am unable to reach my register from the phone, I have to write everything down... I try to punch in her card info... it isn't a valid card. So, since she would have to come in anyway to get her food, I suggested that she just come in and pay, she refused saying that she wants to have her son pick it up. I came back saying that she would need to be there to sign for it anyway. And she wanted me to attempt to run a second card for this transaction, I refused, sensing this was a scam (also, I was needed to ring in other customers), and she demanded to speak to my manager.

A bit later after talking to my manager, I got a bit more info about it... she attempted to run the second card, it was a legit card, but the transaction was refused by the bank.

...she never showed that night.

But hey, at least I got to take roughly $50 of that food home with me! :D
 

bp1986

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Sep 1, 2008
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Oh yea, then there are those oh-so-fun people who like to leave a giant turd in the toilet, then fill it up with toilet paper so it won't flush. But at least here, I have become so desensitization that such things don't really bother me much any more, and I have become a master at using a plunger from all of the 5 pounders that clog the toilet at my house. XD
 

s0denone

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Apr 25, 2008
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TheNecroswanson post=18.70218.684796 said:
Once worked at a Safeway, twas fun times to be had.

AAAaaaah teenagers, they think they're clever. *giggle*
So, a gentleman in his early thirties walks up to the register with 3 girls, couldn't have been over 16, and proceeds to place a 36 pack of Bush, and two 40oz. bottles of vodka on the counter.
"Good evening sir. Whoa, looks like you've got quite the evening planned." I say in that tone that tells of good times to be had.
The man looks at me blankly. "huh? Oh, yeah. Uh, no...This is for, uh my roommate."
I give him the, "awe, lame." look when I realise his three "daughters" were black, asian, and too white to be considered related to him. I look at him a moment.
"Sir, you have quite the brood going. These all yours?"
"huh? Oh uh, no. Just the blonde uh-uh..."
She nudges him and in a hushed tone that apparently teenage girls think you can't hear even though you're a foot away from them "Stacy"
"Stacy, that's right." *Devilish laugh, here's where it gets fun, cause now I know fullwell what's going on.*
"Sir, have you been drinking?"
"No sir, clean a sober 6 years running."
"Hey, Stacy, what's you're last name?"
"Fletcher, what the hell does it matter to you?"
"Stacy Fletcher, that's a pretty name. Anyway, I'll just need to see your I.D. sir."
"oh, uh, yeah."
He goes to pull out his I.D.
"So, how long you been married sir?"
"Me?" he hands me the I.D. "Never married."
"Oh," as I look over the I.D, "Is Stacy adopted?"
"No sir. She's my progieny through and through."
"Yes sir Mr. Erickson she looks just like you.....Not really. I need to inform you that purchasing alchohol for minors is a felony in this state."
Face goes pale. "What're you talking about?"
"Well, you say she's yours, but you don't even have the same last name. And we reserve the right to refuse to sell alchohol to anyone we suspect to be drunk, underage, or intends to give to minors. It's a felony and you could get up to ten years in prison."
The man backs up. "You're on your own kids, I'm keepin' the fifty though." And walks off.
So, I begin to chuckle to myself when the two girls blow up at me. You know, with that, 'little miss thang' tone, and their, "huh-uh, no you didn't just". And as they begin to yammer angrily at me, I seem to get taller, and much more menacing looking then I was before. So, they shrink and tone their voices down. The manager walks by to add some change to my till.
"Hey, we want to talk to your manager!"
"Hey, Roy, you wanna talk to these girls?"
"I don' wanna talk to 'em. You do it."
We laugh.
One of the girls comments, "Damnit, I live ontop of the hill and I don't wanna walk up John Carlson. He was our ride... Hey, you, Ray or whatever your name was, I demand you give us a ride for the way we've been treated!" *John Carlson is a hill with no more than a 35 degree incline RIGHT ACROSS THE STREET.
Roy looks at them, then looks at me, and winks.
"Well, I personally can't do it, but I will be more than happy to send *name withheald* here to take you three home."
"Roy," I say in a pleading tone, "I haven't had a breakthrough with my psychologist yet."
"Oh, you'll be okay."
"But, I'm weak sir, I've had the urges all day."
Black girls chimes in.
"Boy, you ain't gonna kill us quit playing and let's go, sheeeeit."
We both look at her with horrific stares.
"He's.....He wouldn't kill you..."
"Sir, please, if I have to go back to the prison they'll eat me alive. I don't want to rape again. If I have to drive them I won't be ale to control it!"
Their faces turned white as chalk.
"That last girl," I begin to sob and claw at my face, "I can still hear her screams! I didn't want her to die! But I couldn't control myself." Here my voice dropped to a purposeflly audible whisper. "I didn't mean to rape her to death." and I start crying.
They BOOKED! They were gone quicker then you can say, "Say what?"
And then we bust up laughing.




meatloaf231 post=18.70218.684794 said:
Sayvara post=18.70218.684782 said:
Rationality and calmness
Man, you killed it by being all rational and calm. Now everyone's going to feel weird posting stuff here.

EDIT: Well, maybe not Necroswanson, but I don't think he feels anymore.
Nothing is colder than the Necroswansons heart....Naw, I used to workk customer care for a cell company. I helped, I made a difference. However calmness and rationale is always met, for me atleast, with epic amounts of irationality.
Legendary! One love.
 

scienceguy8

Senior Member
Sep 1, 2008
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This summer I worked at a local Wal Mart Supercenter as a Courtesy Associate. They might as well called me Cart Wrangler. The pay was decent and the coworkers were fine. I don't agree with Wal Mart's corporate decisions, but that discussion is for a different thread.

My job, if you have not already guessed, was to collect carts off the lot and either bring them back into the store or line them up alongside one of the store's outer walls if there were plenty indoors already. I also helped people move large, heavy things into their vehicles and tried to keep the parking lot in somewhat decent shape. It is the latter part of my job that brought me the most frustration.

There is a group of people that I refer to as Oil-Changers. These are the people who run into the store to buy a car-care product or accessory, use said product on their vehicle while still in the lot, and then leave their garbage there. These are the people I had the most contempt for. A garbage can in every row and they couldn't be bothered to put their garbage in one of them? Most of the time it was bottles, mainly oil and windshield-washer fluid. One time it was a box for a child's booster seat. The most memorable, however, was a bunch of young adults like myself, high school/college dropouts or soon-to-be dropouts by the looks of them. They show up in this beat-up little import car, go into the store, and come out 15 minutes later with a trunk-mounted car speaker. They install it right in the parking lot, and drive away, leaving the empty box.

I know my story pales in comparison to some of the others here, but litterers irk me to no end.
 
Feb 13, 2008
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When I calm down, I'll let you know about some REAL scum. :)

As a taster, one IC3 male came in today with a Persil Box and stood there pointing at it. (Couldn't speak English at all)

I tried to explain this was a bookshop, but he kept pointing. In the end, after much trying to decipher, he went off in a huff.

Oh, and there was the time a pair of pensioners tried to throw money at my head...and the 8 year old boy who said he was stealing something because he didn't have the money...and the woman who asked for the rubber stamps we had 5 years ago...and....RRRRRRRRRRAAAAAAARRRGGGGGHHH.

Calm...calm...calm... more later.
 

bp1986

New member
Sep 1, 2008
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Ahh yes, the children... I am wanting to start offering a free service to all people in my store. While parents don't want to be the 'Bad Guy' and punish their children... I have no moral problem with smacking about the screaming bastard!

Just imagine-
Free service: I will hit your kid!
$5: I will hit someone elses' kid!


That would be AWESOME! :D
 

NewClassic_v1legacy

Bringer of Words
Jul 30, 2008
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On occasion, getting reported is hilarious.

I worked in the mall,which has a closing time of 9 PM, further enforced by the handy, convenient loud speaker of over the entire building reminding customers and employees alike that it was indeed 8:00, and that the mall will be closing in an hour.

So, for the sake of thoroughness, I patrol the arcade, politely stopping at each customer to remind them that we'll be closing in an hour, and hopefully that gives them enough time to bring whatever game they're playing to a close.

Sure enough, 8:45 rolls around, and I make my round again, reminding everyone that fifteen minutes is left before closing, so they should bring any ticket transactions to my attention with some haste. As a resounding reply, the arcades bleeped and blooped at me, with no amount of calling or dissension from the customers. Smooth work, easy money.

Five minutes to close, all of the unused machines have been cleaned, tickets shredded and dumped, trash taken out, tiles mopped, and windows shined to perfection, all that was left was to vacuum after the customers left. So I do the last call round, saying no more tokens are to be put in, that this was the very last game. So I lower the gate, not fully closed so the last straggler can leave, but still down enough to tell any on-comers that their business is not appreciated. I then retrieve the vacuum, a power plug, and begin cleaning the carpet.

After I'm done vacuuming, 9:12 at this point, I put the vacuum away, and catch that last freakin' customer still at his machine, playing the two-finger samba with the boss of the fighting game. "After this fight, man, you gotta go. I'm about to leave myself."
"'Kay." was the distracted reply. Cool, I went to the back, took off my vest, counted out the money, and locked the safe for the night. When I got back out, he was on Round 2 of his next game.
Oi. "Excuse me, sir, I called last game over twenty minutes ago."
"I'm sorry, lemme finish this round."
Eh, why the hell not, I didn't have anywhere else to be. "Okay, but this round alone, and that's it. I need to leave."
Well, he finished the round, after stomping the AI into place.
"Alright, come on, I need to turn off the machines."
"C'mon man." Oh great... "Just one more run."
"C'mon dude, I've given you more than twenty-five minutes now." Lie, only gave him twenty-four, "It late, I'm tired, and we've been closed for almost a half-hour now. If you keep staying, I'm going to kill the machines."
"Fine, whatever." He waited for me to turn around, then got right back on, still playing. Passive aggressive tactics, go! No playing for me, he was warned. The breaker made an audible click as the lights and machines all fell into the off position. Silence reigned.
"What the hell, man!"
He was leaning into the office door, silhouetted by the light in the office. "I should report you."
I handed him the report form, helped him fill in the blanks, signed, timed, and dated it, then left it for my boss. When I got there the next day, he asked me about the time, I told this story, and that customer wasn't allowed back in the arcade for a week.

Note, all bad language on the part of Customer A was censored for the sake of not remembering all of the wording completely correctly. Give a man an inch, and he'll take an arcade.
 

Death Magnetic

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Aug 10, 2008
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Can't wait until I start work in public, I've only worked with the council in the finance department so far for work experience.
Seriously, from these stories, where do the dumb asses come from?