Things That Make or Break a Relationship

[teisjm]

In no particular order.

Love, trust, shared interrests/friendship, sex, she can make good sandwichs, no big conflict of interrests (liek one is a fanatic relegion 1 and the otehr a fanatic relegion 2, one wants kids NOW, the other NEVER)

 

[madcap2112]

Me: So I'm studying to become a musician.
Date: I love music! It's, like, my life.
Me: So who're some of your favorite artists?
Date: [Insert pop artists ere]
Me: *runs in front of bus*

I like to think of those situations as a challenge. It's a chance to spread the good word of good music.

But if it doesn't work, then run. Run far and fast.

Usually if someone says they like any random top 40 artist, they won't like good music.

More than likely. But if I can get past that and her remaining qualities outweigh the bad music tastes, I can work through it and try to show her the light.

 

[The Big Eye]

Maggot-to-flesh ratio.

Also, frequent use of the word "retarded" out of context. I like retarded people!

 

[Julianking93]

Me: So I'm studying to become a musician.
Date: I love music! It's, like, my life.
Me: So who're some of your favorite artists?
Date: [Insert pop artists ere]
Me: *runs in front of bus*

I like to think of those situations as a challenge. It's a chance to spread the good word of good music.

But if it doesn't work, then run. Run far and fast.

Usually if someone says they like any random top 40 artist, they won't like good music.

More than likely. But if I can get past that and her remaining qualities outweigh the bad music tastes, I can work through it and try to show her the light.

True, but my experience with teenage girls who love [random top 40 "artist"] hasn't been too great. In my case, if they like either top 40 music, Twilight or High School Musical, I usually won't have anything in common with them based on that.

 

[Good morning blues]

Talk of "deal-breakers" is treacherous. It might be something that you find really unattractive, but if I sit here and think, "what if I met a girl that was perfect in every way, except she was a chain-smoker?" I can't really say that one single flaw would break it for me.

 

[madcap2112]

True, but my experience with teenage girls who love [random top 40 "artist"] hasn't been too great. In my case, if they like either top 40 music, Twilight or High School Musical, I usually won't have anything in common with them based on that.

Well, yeah, Twilight and High School Musical are obviously deal-breakers for me. I guess if Top 40 is all a girl listens to and she says directly that she hates the bands I love, then yeah, that kills it.

 

[SimuLord]

There are some things that will send me scurrying for the exit and not requesting a second date:

- If she has kids. I want kids of my own someday, and maybe if I'm a lot older this'll be less of an issue, but right now, at my age, I'm not takin' on someone else's offspring.

- If she's covered in tattoos. Tats are a huge turnoff of mine. Not sayin' I'd ditch a girl with, say, a small, tasteful one in an inconspicuous location, but a sleeve or a mural on her back is right out.

- Cigarettes. I hate the way they smell, I hate the way they make everything in my house smell if she insists on smoking indoors (ran into this problem once upon a time), and truth be told I'm of the mind that a smoking habit says a LOT about the quality of someone's upbringing and social class.

- A dominant personality. I have one. Two dominant people is a recipe for a power struggle---I like my women demure and submissive.

- Inability to put the fucking cell phone or iPod/iPod Touch away during a date. When my ex-wife started doing this, I knew we were on the road to destruction because it's the ultimate sign of not giving two shits about the person you're sitting across a table from.

 

[TriGGeR_HaPPy]

Make:
Love, for one.
If she loves me (not just saying it, but she actually loves me), then that's usually a good start. Of course, that's sometimes a little hard to tell until you've been together a while. And even then...
Personality... I can't really define one, but it's still pretty damn high on the list. E.g. There're heaps of girls who have personalities I don't like. Same with guys.
But some just have that right mix of varied traits, that just add up beautifully...
Other than that? Attractiveness can be good, sure. But it's not a defining factor for me...

Break:
If she cheats. That's a big one...
Personality. Opposite of above, obviously...

Everything else can help or hinder a relationship, I won't deny that. But listed above are the only major ones for me.

 

[Julianking93]

Talk of "deal-breakers" is treacherous. It might be something that you find really unattractive, but if I sit here and think, "what if I met a girl that was perfect in every way, except she was a chain-smoker?" I can't really say that one single flaw would break it for me.

That's one of the big one's for me seeing as I'm allergic to cigarettes.

 

[lay-lanie]

Well, it'd be great if they had the same sense of humor that i do. Lack of an alcohol dependency would be great too. I don't mind guys who first fell in love with their computer along with a high speed internet source, but it'd be nice to be picked first every once in a while =P
Also:

She has to be tall. It's weird and possibly shallow but..we 6'3" folk need some loving too. I once dated a girl who was 5'3" and it was ridiculous.

What about a girl who's taller than you?

My first girl friend was 5'11 when I was still 5'8 (I'm now 6'3)

If she's taller than me then why teach her when she can teach me..eh?..eh?..eh?

She has to be tall. It's weird and possibly shallow but..we 6'3" folk need some loving too. I once dated a girl who was 5'3" and it was ridiculous.

I dated a girl who was 5'1", and I'm 6'6".

Although that wasn't what killed the relationship. It was because she lied to me [sub]And the five-o's of course[/sub]

Single bed, I'm tall and she's not, I toss and turn a lot when I sleep..I nearly smothered her by accident one day.

Though that wasn't the final nail in the coffin (I was leaving the country for a significant period of time) I couldn't help but feel that the variation in height was straining more than my anatomy.

I'm not saying that I don't love short girls, just not as much as the ones above 5'6".

6'2" here and my wife is 4'11". Then again, we have a Queen bed and I don't move around much. Holy crap though, it's amazing how much of the bed she can take up while still being so small, kind of like a cat.

Oh I have been an avid supporter to have all university dorms swap single wooden beds for queen beds but sadly some people think it's a waste of a good budget. Queen/King size beds are the only way to go for a comfortable nights sleep.

I may be short, but I do take up bed space and tend to wake up as a human blanket without realizing it, so it'd be nice if he was already use to that kinda thing. xD


Edit: older=FTW <3

 

[Khada]

equality in all things. otherwise piss off.

(within reason of course... eg, id rather she didnt have a penis )

 

[lay-lanie]

(within reason of course... eg, id rather she didnt have a penis )

... not even a little one? xP

 

[Gildan Bladeborn]

Genital warts. I'd imagine that would probably be a deal breaker.

 

[Monkfish Acc.]

I would never ever submit anyone to anything as horrible as a romantic relationship unless I completely despised them.
So, probably one of the biggest breakers for me is to be in any way likeable.

But then again, I would not want to spend a whole bunch of time with someone I hated.
So I guess being completely unlikeable is also a major dealbreaker with me.

Huh. Looks like my romantic calendar is gonna remain completely free, then.
Sweet.

 

[jboking]

for me, an easy make or break is conversational skill and willingness to talk about metaphysical and philosophical things every so often. In general, I want to be able to talk to the other person about more than how they are and their day. I certainly want to hear those things, but I want to have actual meaningful conversation too. If the girl can't hold a conversation without it being about her, I'm out. I'm a bit softer on the philosophy conversations though, as I understand not all people 'get' philosophy. But if I explain what a moral hierarchy is and talk about whether Sanctity of life should be placed below or above Autonomy(which I will explain to them if they don't know what it is), then I typically can't keep the relationship going. That one isn't an immediate end of relationship after the failed conversation, I've just found that I can't keep long term relationships with people who refuse/can't discuss those things.

 

[_zuul]

poorly timed cannibalism, also fucking their mom. you can do no wrong!

um, smoking, on the other hand, is usually a deal breaker.
she was a **** anyway, solid snake. who cares about meryl? we all know you're gay for otacon.

 

[SirDeadly]

My biggest hype is trust. Not in the way of cheating on me or whatever but being able to tell him a secret and not have it broadcasted to all of our friends. The cheating thing doesn't hurt me nearly as much as a betrayal.

This guy knows what he's talking about, betrayal hurts so much more. You need to be able to trust the person with your life or it's not gonna work well...

 

[lay-lanie]

My biggest hype is trust. Not in the way of cheating on me or whatever but being able to tell him a secret and not have it broadcasted to all of our friends. The cheating thing doesn't hurt me nearly as much as a betrayal.

This guy knows what he's talking about, betrayal hurts so much more. You need to be able to trust the person with your life or it's not gonna work well...

second that.

 

[Tourette]

Swinging

 

[MelziGurl]

Dishonesty and failure to work through problems. My relationship works so well because we have complete honesty and actually work to solve our issues rather than walking away or ignoring them. I know things about his past that even his parents don't know about.