Top Ten Sex Tips
- Thread starter The Wooster
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Well, yeah, it's that simple. But, quite frankly, it gets boring. It's something I've griped about to my boyfriend before, and he agrees with me. There are so many different areas on women for guys to play with, but there's only like two or so things on guys for girls to play with. So when you're just playing with the same two things all the time, it gets really boring and it makes you want more things to play with. And then you have to come up with weird shit to make sexy times more interesting so you can keep having fun with it.Blade_125 said:
I got yaoi... I'm fairly okay with that -shrug-Keepeas said:ThunderCavalier said:...that's what I got...it could be worse...
...much worse...
OT: Sex tip number 1: surprise anal will get you divorced. asking inquisitively will get you anal.
This can be applied to 90% of situations.
As 5ilver says the "score" in that situation is for the guy in question, her feelings on the matter are not considered relevant in that particular case...I assume, although maybe she likes it and he likes doing her up the butt so he's happy to find they both like it but doesn't like it being done to himself, which is fine, just because your partner likes something doesn't mean you have to do it too. But from your example I guess you mean the former.Boudica said:
Captachs: hear me roar! I feel that is relevant somehow.
OT: yeah...I believe I read somewhere (might have been on cracked though) that a women's mag had suggested tugging down on or pressing up on a guys balls during sex was supposed to...er... I can't remember, but anyway, while the phrase "don't neglect the balls" is one near to my heart I feel that with all the thrusting and what have you during sex, accidentally tugging or pushing in the opposite direction unexpectedly could cause some horrible mishaps.
That sounds sticky and uncomfortable.hentropy said:
Isn't that what's supposed to come at the end?
*Consults list of PG-rated fetishes safe to mention on the Escapist*daftalchemist said:
Run a nice hot soapy bath so that you can soak together naked at least as deep to the upper chest. Put a blindfold on them and then slowly, sensuously start brushing their teeth as you cradle them from behind. Use a soft bristle brush and be gentle but firm, and whatever you do..
Don't ruin the moment by using an automatic toothbrush.
Am I any good at this shtick?
One of my friends read in one of those magazines that you could put a wire coat hanger up the penis as a turn on. She tried it the boyfriend was not pleased at all.
Because a thick, jagged wire being jammed into a urethra isn't an immediately horrible-sounding idea.mental_looney said:
I do not know your friend but I can immediately tell she is a scary person.
We're sliding down a slippery slope here. With all this male penetration us dudes might just pair off and... wait... YESSSSSS
Source [http://he-who-wakes.tumblr.com/post/13804831718/from-community-on-nbc-for-when-the-thread-youre]
Source [http://he-who-wakes.tumblr.com/post/13804831718/from-community-on-nbc-for-when-the-thread-youre]
She was super nice and bubbly, but never the brightest so not scary just misguided.Lord Beautiful said:
It really is, but magazines can't tell you that. How is Cosmo supposed to make money if it's not telling you how ugly you are? And how much prettier you could be if you bought the latest designer clothes and makeup, bleached your asshole, dropped 50 pounds, and took a class in acrobatics so you can perform Cirque du Soleil in the bedroom for your boyfriend who is also an underwear model?DrgoFx said:
I always wondered who actually took those sections seriously. I mean, why would some semi illiterate person writing for some home ec magazine know more about how a penis works than the owner of said penis?
I mean, I dunno about the rest of you guys, but I've been using a penis(mine) for things other than urination at least 12 years now. I'm pretty much THE expert in the fields of Mypenisology AND Mypenisonomy. If there are any questions at all about the subject, I'm absolutely positive that I am the person to go to about them.
I mean, I dunno about the rest of you guys, but I've been using a penis(mine) for things other than urination at least 12 years now. I'm pretty much THE expert in the fields of Mypenisology AND Mypenisonomy. If there are any questions at all about the subject, I'm absolutely positive that I am the person to go to about them.
I believe Dave Chappelle said it best in one of his stand up comedy acts:
"The problem is that women get too much advice about men from other women. You'll see a ladies' magazine that says "100 Ways to Please Your Man...by: Some Lady." Pfffft, really? That list is just 4 things long: suck his dick, play with his balls, fix him a sandwich, and don't talk so much."
Really is that simple. ;3
"The problem is that women get too much advice about men from other women. You'll see a ladies' magazine that says "100 Ways to Please Your Man...by: Some Lady." Pfffft, really? That list is just 4 things long: suck his dick, play with his balls, fix him a sandwich, and don't talk so much."
Really is that simple. ;3
All those women's magazine sex tips are all completely overthought. I present to you my number 1 tip to get your man aroused and in the mood.
-Take your clothes off.
-Take your clothes off.