Trying to convince my friend he's not a paedophile

[Jamboxdotcom]

as many others have pointed out, the definition of pedophilia has been distorted, especially here in the US. being attracted to a teenager (regardless of your age) is not wrong in any way. however, age of consent laws do make it wrong to pursue that attraction. basically, as long as a person has at least hit puberty, it's ok to look, just don't touch.

 

[thedeathscythe]

Get him to check the "paedophile" page on wikipedia. That will state the actual scientific definition of paedophilia, which is an obsessive attraction to prepubescent children. Unless this 15 year old is very under-developed for his age then your friend should be in the clear, although obviously he shouldn't try anything with the boy as I'm guessing that's under the age of consent where you live.

This. He wouldn't be a pedophile unless the boy was 10 or 11, or under. He's attracted to a minor, which isn't as bad as he thinks. It's sketchy, and it depends on where the boy lives but he might not be at the age to consent, but if it doesn't come to that, I don't think there's anything (legally) wrong. Morally, well that's all subjective.

 

[Xyliss]

Four years isn't that much (though he should leave it for now).

He's better waiting for a few years to see then is he moves onto other yonger boys then maybe he is, if it's just this one guy then he won't be

 

[Dexiro]

Gah I've heard of 15 year olds thinking they're paedos because they're attracted to people a year younger than them.

There's a certain limit but a 19 year old liking someone who's 15 isn't that bad. It's like a 4 year age difference? And it's a fairly late stage of puberty.

 

[MatsVS]

In Scandinavia 15 is legal

I can't speak for Sweden or Denmark, but in Norway, the age of consent is 16.

 

[Megacherv]

Your friend is not a pedophile for the reasons listed.
The only reason he thinks so is because that's what society screams that he is.

But he isn't.

I...erm...yeah, what she said

 

[kikon9]

Given that older couples can have as much as a ten year difference, your friend shouldn't be worried as long as he doesn't try to rape the kid.

 

[Madara XIII]

he would technically be an Ephebophile which is someone who is attracted to teens in the later stages of puberty. and because I can't resist mentioning it. anyone who has watched or read azumanga daioh knows who the king of Ephebophiles is.
so good news your friends not a pedophile. bad news he's basically this guy.
http://oi39.tinypic.com/igz0py.jpg

NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Get that thing away from me!!!! I watched Azumanga Dioah with my lil sis and I am horrified by that man....severely....*Cries in the corner* Don't let him touch me..I'll be a good student

 

[Commissar Sae]

While at 15 a 4 year difference is pretty big, it's really not a big deal. My girlfriend is 4 years younger than me (I'm 23) and we get along just fine. Theres actually a handy mathematical formula to see if the person you're interested in is too young or not. Half your age plus seven is the magic formula. So 19 would technically be 16.5 but theres always a little room.

 

[Thebiggestpanda]

Your friend likes little boys? Just make sure he never becomes a Priest haha I kid. But being serious, just don't break any age of consent laws and he should be fine. Also tell him to research ancient greek culture if he wants to know what real pedophilia is like. bleh.

 

[FallenJellyDoughnut]

Seriously dude? I think your friend is just into Jailbait, which isn't uncommon. I know at of least 5 slutty 14-year-olds with 20-year-old boyfriends at my school. God I hate my generation.

 

[The3rdEye]

No, for reasons stated previously.

He's been pissing me off with this because all he's talked about is either how much he likes this 15 year old guy, or how much he hates himself and fears he's going to go to prison.

What you REALLY need to do is slap the stupid out of him. Seriously.

He's either overindulging in the "excitement" of doing something (he believes) to be illegal and annoying the hell out of you in the process, or he actually IS a pedo and is just using someone 4 years younger than he is to gauge your response before disclosing interest in someone much younger.

Either way, five across the face (literally or metaphorically, your pick) would be my suggestion.

 

[Paksenarrion]

Spoiler

EDITED DUE TO CONTENT

I'm kidding. In all seriousness, have him categorize his attraction. Is it lust or love? If it's love, then he'll have no problem just spending time with the boy and being friends. If it's lust...

...tell him to wait.[footnote] Please do not make jokes of this nature. The jail bait comments are not welcome, joke or not. We can't let people dance along that line, so we have to be absolute in what we allow and what we don't. If it can offend someone, it's usually not a good idea to post it. Jokes may appear ok on paper, but not everyone may share your sense of humor. Please consider this in the future. Thanks! -Aylaine[/footnote]

 

[Ziadaine_v1legacy]

Teenagers being attracted to teenagers is normal. So is teenagers obsessing over teenagers.

Pretty much this.

That'd be labeling Gays and/or straight couples with big age gaps as pedos as well. My ex who was 15 (I was 16) cheated and got knocked up by a 28 year old. If that wasn't pedo'e, then this definatly isn't pedo. besides, alot of relationships or "lusts" at that age are surprisingly common. Though I suppose the 15yo would have to feel the same. Otherwise thats not being a pedo, that's just obsession.