"Unavoidable" Global Bacon Shortage Expected Next Year

[Genocidicles]

Not much of a fan of bacon, but if I have to go a week without a sausage sandwich, I think I might lose it.

 

[OldNewNewOld]

If only bacon was any good to begin with, I would maybe, just maybe give a single fuck about this. But since it's shit, you own me 10 fucks for reading this... "article".

 

[Infernai]

No bacon.....NO BACON!?

Ok, that's it..you thought my one man war against the Bronies in the dark ages of the internet was horrifying. Well, the world is going to give me my bacon, or i shall take it by whatever means necessary:

I'm ready when you are world.

 

[C F]

Today...is a good day to like Turkey Bacon.

Screw pork.

I'll stand by you.

What's there to like about pigs anyway?
Except for the fact they constitute 107%[footnote]98% of Steve?'s consumption, and about 9% of my lust for stabbing things with a sword.[/footnote] of my Minecraft diet.

But seriously. I'm not that big a fan of bacon anyway.

 

[Tales of Golden Sun]

Just eat something else.

 

[Somethingfake]

N...No...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
[HEADING=2]I'm outta here![/HEADING]

THERES NOTHING LEFT FOR ME IN THIS WORLD!!!

Could you tell me where that gif is from?

Geez, third timeI have been asked.

It's from Angel Beats.

All right mate, chill your beans, we've all been guilty of not reading every single post on a thread.

 

[DeltaEdge]

I'm glad I don't eat bacon much, if ever. I don't even like bacon... Please don't kill me.

 

[Rack]

I'm glad I don't eat bacon much, if ever. I don't even like bacon... Please don't kill me.

More bacon for us, in these dark times I think we can all appreciate a few martyrs such as yourself.

 

[deathninja]

"China has begun stockpiling bacon"

Calling it now, next year the US kicks off WW3 in another desperate resource grab.

 

[LobsterFeng]

I just wanted to say that this video:
was playing in the background while I was reading all of these posts, and it made the gifs way more hilarious than what was intended.

I only like bacon when it's chewy and nobody seems to make it that way over here so meh. But I do love pork and ham.

 

[NiPah]

N...No...NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!
[HEADING=2]I'm outta here![/HEADING]

THERES NOTHING LEFT FOR ME IN THIS WORLD!!!

Could you tell me where that gif is from?

Geez, third timeI have been asked.

It's from Angel Beats.

All right mate, chill your beans, we've all been guilty of not reading every single post on a thread.

Well it is a bloody awesome anime, definitely worth the watch... WHEN THERE IS NO BACON.

 

[MeChaNiZ3D]

To think that all these years people have been trying to push awareness and action against climate change by presenting horrific facts about the environment and sea levels, when bacon was at risk! If someone had just said "And what's more...no bacon", this whole thing would be sorted by now.

 

[chozo_hybrid]

Oh well, it's something that I can live without. Or maybe people can learn to pace themselves and stop using copious amounts of it. Like those morons from Epic Meal Time...

 

[SnowBurst]

well cows must be damn worried now

 

[Storm Dragon]

NNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...

 

[teh_Canape]

This is...this is...we have to act. We must save the bacon! Now! BEFORE IT'S TOO LATE!

we must... we must...
I KNOW
WE SHOULD SPLICE PORK AND PLANT DNA AND MAKE BACON THAT GROWS ON TREES!

 

[Storm Dragon]

...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!

 

[Valanthe]

This is how it began, it seemed so innocent, so innocuous. But we ignored the warnings, didn't consider the bigger picture until it was too late. The lack of bacon led to rioting in Washington, London, and Paris. Nations unable to supply their people with the delicious fatty substance quickly fell to anarchy.

China had seen the signs, and began, in an alliance with North Korea, to stockpile their bacon while implementing harsh rationing programs on their population. Able to weather the storm, they came out ahead of all the other nations, with their economic superiority they began to pass laws that affected billions, with the threat of embargoes from the last remaining bacon supplier, the other countries fell into line swiftly, or so it seemed.

The American people, having spent so long as the top dogs in the world, refused to bow down to their new Chinese masters, and struck out, mobilizing their navy to break the blockades. And so began the Great Bacon War.

 

[Pharsalus]

Sweet jeesus, what about all the Waffle Houses?! The South will have to secede again and invade the north for bacon.

 

[Imp_Emissary]

Hah, I eat soy bacon bitches. Let's get some fuckin' synthetic poultry UP IN THIS

shit yeah

Sorry to bum you out, but the reason we are going to have a bacon shortage is because we are having a soy shortage.

More people eat bacon than soy, so..... All soy will be going to feed the bac-, I mean pigs. ;p

Edit: Ah, I have been ninja'd. First time.