Unlikely last words

[crudus]

"Did I remember to lock the door?"
"Did I remember to turn off the oven?"

or

"go to your room. I am very angry. I am very very cross!"

 

[Ebulliant-Hater]

"Unicorns are real."

 

[emeraldrafael]

Of course Cyanide is edible!
Wnat me to show you how much fun it is to play Mercury?
I'm positive this is the end the gun fires from!

 

[thingymuwatsit]

"Unicorns are real."

This was said by the OP, but there aren't very many SMBC quotes here...

 

[AssassinJoe]

I think Candlejack is in my hou-

And of course someone has to mention Candlejack. Don't you think it's been overused as an internet joke? I mean it was funny at first but now it's just stu-

 

[AssassinJoe]

"Did I remember to lock the door?"
"Did I remember to turn off the oven?"

or

"go to your room. I am very angry. I am very very cross!"

HA! Doctor Who reference! You sir, are very much win!

 

[blarghblarghhhhh]

go to your room

 

[FalloutJack]

"Whoosh!"

 

[.Andi.]

"Better check on that lavalamp.. stoves do get pretty ho-" (this happened; a guy in a trailer died this way)

"Either those curtains go, or I do." (supposedly Oscar Wilde)

"Keep Ted Turner and his goddamn crayolas away from my movies!" - Orson Wells

"Weren't the 70's a drag?" - John Lennon

"Oh god! My Epipen is in the clo-" *gurglegurgle* - more than likely me

 

[.Andi.]

I think Candlejack is in my hou-

And of course someone has to mention Candlejack. Don't you think it's been overused as an internet joke? I mean it was funny at first but now it's just stu-

Gawd, the internet is all about being a digital parrot - no one comes up with any new ideas! I mean, uhg - the candlejack thing has been sooo overdone. It's not even funny anym-

 

[willofbob]

I remember reading somewhere that, just before he got hit by an artillery shell, a WWI British General said "I hope to see you for lunch next tuesday"

 

[Yubadias]

Man, if I land this jump....

 

[Lancer873]

"Haha! I really had you guys going there. You thought this was real blood, didn't you?"
"Beans, beans, the wonderful fruit."
"This is so amazing! I think I just died and went to heaven!"

 

[Communist partisan]

Haha, I died before you!

 

[crudus]

go to your room

"Did I remember to lock the door?"
"Did I remember to turn off the oven?"

or

"go to your room. I am very angry. I am very very cross!"

HA! Doctor Who reference! You sir, are very much win!

It wasn't something we could let slip by was it

 

[galdon2004]

I think Candlejack is in my hou-

And of course someone has to mention Candlejack. Don't you think it's been overused as an internet joke? I mean it was funny at first but now it's just stu-

Gawd, the internet is all about being a digital parrot - no one comes up with any new ideas! I mean, uhg - the candlejack thing has been sooo overdone. It's not even funny anym-

I can't help but notice each reply to a candlejack reference ends up taking more words than the last; its almost like he waits for the most opportune time to cut you off.

Huh? he didn't cut me off? I could have sworn he would have snatched right at opp-

 

[Kraiiit]

Respawning in three, two, one...

 

[Aur0ra145]

My toilet is clogged

 

[robodukky]

"My final regret is that I did not outlive that blue bastard Sonic the Hedgehog"...

 

[ApeShapeDeity]

Ok, as far as I'm concerned this is from an ubsubstanitated "legit" source, but the most common (english) last word is "shit". No idea how they support thier claim.

Beliveable/certain=
"Hey, everybody! Watch this!"
"Nah, I've got this."
"What do you mean dangerous? Pussy!"
"Yeah? What are you gonna do about it?"

Incredible/odd=
'A waffle NEVER killed anyone!'
'No, my cat LOVES me.'
'If I can just weld this gas cylinder to this thing...'
'What? It's only a fucking tortise!'