On this most auspicious of nights permit me then, in lieu of the more commonplace subrique instead to suggest the character of this dramatis persona.
Voila!
In view a humble vaudevillian veteran cast vicariously as both victim and villian by the vicissitudes of fate. This visage, no meer veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi now vacant; Vanished! However, this valorous visitation of a bygone vexation stands vivified and has vowed to vanguish these venal and virulent vermin van guarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition!
The only verdict is vengeance. A vendetta. Held as a votive not in vain; for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous.
HAHAHAHA! But, verily this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose so let me simply add that it is my very good honor to meet you and you may call me Khedive Rex.
... Yeah ...