What's your favourite Yahtzee quote?

[DoubleTime]

"It all fits quite nicely together - like furious, blood-stained stickle bricks."

I love God of War, and that line appeals to my general sense of humor, especially when you add the picture associated with it. ^_^

 

[MetallicMonkey]

"Hey, everyone!! Let's all be PC Gamers!! Let's all talk on Skype and change our desktop wallpapers and play proper games with mouses and keyboards...while you wait all day for the fucking update to download and cross your bronzed, muscular PC Gaming fingers that the damn thing will even work. But it's so much purer than than console gaming, isn't it? While you wait all day for the PSN to come back online then cross your bloated, filth encrusted console gaming fingers that your credit card details aren't being hacked by african warlords! Perhaps we have more in common than we think."
-The Witcher 2.

He pretty much summed up a lot of the experience I've had PC gaming with that rant.

 

[TotalHobNob]

"My love is as poisonous and caustic as my hate." Kinda applies to me. Also, "It could only be more awesome if it had tits and was on fire."

 

[Revolution -X-]

Seriously? You want me to narrow it down to just one? Anything that man says is comedic gold; I can't pick just one of of the eleventy-billion lesbian dipped in chocolate lines Yahtzee utters.

 

[CATB320]

The first thing that came to mind was a quote from the Portal review. The devs "cut corners like a circle factory during crunch time."

 

[uhddh]

"I don't think America is populated entirely by assholes and cowboys; I know that some Canadians live there, too."

Or "Call me a cynic,please do it's the only for of identity I have left,..."

 

[the random]

the one about the gun that shoots shurikins and lightning
"it could only be more awesome if it had tits and were on fire"

 

[Lunar Templar]

"Never stick your dick in a pudding. It may still be good pudding and you could spend all day defending that, but no one's gonna eat it because YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN IT!"

Always makes me laugh, no matter what mood I'm in.

this, my favorite quote of his ever

next to 'this shit will not beat me'

 

[triggrhappy94]

The only one I can think of ver badum is "Go team retard"

 

[diwwib]

I recently had a bit of a Yahtzee binge, watching far in excess of the maximum healthy amount of Zero Puntuation videos and the quote that stands out in my mind is this:

"If a game has a Portal reference, whatever purpose it serves, it tells you everything you need to know about the absolute wankers who had creative control of the thing. If Portal had the comedic value of a perfectly timed fart, then Portal references at this stage are a fart that has been going on for about six or seven minutes and now the stench in the room is causing bouts of spontaneous vomiting, and a strange blood-flecked liquid is dripping from the perpetrator's anus."

It's pretty gruesome, but I find it rather funny and it makes a very valid point that can be applied to just about all internet memes and jokes, so it's a good one to remeber.

 

[Squarez]

BULL
(WHAT)
FUCKING
(ARBITRARY)
SHIT
(SILLINESS)

 

[dalek sec]

This thread is alive again,

Well, my answer is the same as it was when it first appeared:

"This shit will not beat me."

That one. I love it because it can be applied to around every situation.

What is that one line from?

"This shit will not beat me."

Well for me it's pretty much the whole Wolfenstein review he did, that's just crazy.

It's really hard to pick a few key favorites, alot of his writing is really funny.

 

[Blobpie]

my all time favorite one is:

"It's like taking your cat and eating it, which is a saying i never really understood. I mean it's perfectly reasonable to want to eat a cake, there is not much else you can do with it... expect hide in one if your a stripper"

 

[SquidVicious]

Describing the dark nature of Limbo as "Grim multiplied by bleak to the power of Hot Topic"

 

[Eddie the head]

"It just goes to show: never stick your dick in a pudding. It might still be good pudding and you can spend all afterrnon explaining that to people but no one's still going to eat it because YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN IT!"

 

[GojiraGamer]

Hmm. A couple of my many favorites would be:
"But Yahtzee, you charismatic stallion!"
"Go Team Retard."
"Bull. Fucking. Shit!" (What Arbitrary Silliness shows on screen)
"Never stick your dick in a pudding. It might still be good pudding, and you can spend all afternoon trying to convince people of that, but no one's going to eat it because *you stuck your dick in it*!"
"[The Witcher 2] introduces combat in the same way a randy stallion introduces his powerful turgid cock."
"The very first image in the game is a brief flash-forward depicting your helmet lying discarded in the dust of battle-scarred terrain, what the fuck do you think happens in the end? Your character thrillingly and climatically gets a little bit hot?"
"The combat had been vastly improved, but everything else had been beaten with the angsty stick and forced to write poetry with penfuls of black eyeliner."
"On paper it looked like everything we'd hoped for: The light-heartedness and Arabian aesthetic of Sands of Time, combined with the improved gameplay of Warrior Within, but then a lot of things look good on paper, like the little blue dolphins on toilet paper that fail to distract from the fact that I am wiping my ass with it."

 

[Elfgore]

Hmm. A couple of my many favorites would be:
"But Yahtzee, you charismatic stallion!"
"Go Team Retard."
"Bull. Fucking. Shit!" (What Arbitrary Silliness shows on screen)
"Never stick your dick in a pudding. It might still be good pudding, and you can spend all afternoon trying to convince people of that, but no one's going to eat it because *you stuck your dick in it*!"
"[The Witcher 2] introduces combat in the same way a randy stallion introduces his powerful turgid cock."
"The very first image in the game is a brief flash-forward depicting your helmet lying discarded in the dust of battle-scarred terrain, what the fuck do you think happens in the end? Your character thrillingly and climatically gets a little bit hot?"
"The combat had been vastly improved, but everything else had been beaten with the angsty stick and forced to write poetry with penfuls of black eyeliner."
"On paper it looked like everything we'd hoped for: The light-heartedness and Arabian aesthetic of Sands of Time, combined with the improved gameplay of Warrior Within, but then a lot of things look good on paper, like the little blue dolphins on toilet paper that fail to distract from the fact that I am wiping my ass with it."

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