Snowy Rainbow said:
I was raised Catholic, went to Catholic school, my whole family are strong believers, to the point of always commenting on how wrong homosexuality is when they see any signs of it. And I had that drilled into me for my whole life to the point that I actually thought they were right. Then about two years ago, I found out I was gay and fell into a spiral of self hating about it because I still thought they were right. I even went to see a counsiler to 'fix' myself.
Thankfully the person convinced me otherwise, though I still haven't told any of my family or friends since they are all the same as my parents. And I still regularly hear about how being gay is a sin. My GF and her family are the only people who know me that I'm gay in RL.
So... yeah, my life wasn't great, and I would give anything so people don't have to endure what I did.
Wow. Thank you for sharing your continuing struggle.
Not being in your position at all and perhaps thus not able to comment on the issue, I'd like to try if you would hear me? I think 'coming out' would be good for you. Despite the hate you have around you, I'd think being able to be completely honest with yourself would help you heal some of the harm.
As I said, I'm not you and I've never been in your position, so please don't be offended or take my comments to be insulting in any way.
No offence taken, I have considered it several times, but I still rely on my family as it is, and I know my parents (if not they whole family) would disown me for being gay, my GF has tried to talk me into it saying I can always move in with her, but I wouldn't want to cause her any problems.
And this even sounds stupid to me, but they are my family, even if they are small minded and ignorant, I still love them, they've done their best to bring me up and I will always be grateful for that, even if they hate me without knowing it.
Yeah.... reading that back, it sounds really stupid, but that is how I feel.
Maybe in the future I will tell them, but not until I can support myself.