Would you date a former cheater?

[game-lover]

Or a former Other woman/man? Or someone who formerly betrayed their BFF by stealing their significant other or whatever? (More accurately, would you be willing to be their friend or best friend even?)

This is something I was reminded of wondering what with all the relationship threads I've been seeing. But mostly inspired by the deal breakers one.

And speaking of those, would anyone date a person who used to formerly have or practice said deal breaker? Former party girls, former addicts, former whatever?


Just curious.

 

[Moonlight Butterfly]

No, but then people don't exactly tell everyone that sort of thing.

I wouldn't knowingly go out with a cheater mostly because my dad gave my mum anorexia by cheating on her and she nearly died.

 

[disgruntledgamer]

Depends on the circumstance and if I'd think she would do it to me as well. Sometimes people just have things coming. As for all the Formers, sure why not as long as the tests came up clean who am I to judge.

 

[Zhukov]

Yup.

If I were to shun every person who had ever done something stupid or worthy of regret then I would be a very lonely fellow.

 

[TheRightToArmBears]

Yup.

If I were to shun every person who had ever done something stupid or worthy of regret then I would be a very lonely fellow.

Pretty much this.

I guess it does depend a bit, but I have dated someone who cheated on a past partner (I actually broke up with them for various reasons, none of them were their fault). People are going to change over time, especially in their teenage years. To never forgive someone for something that they might well regret heavily themselves strikes me as completely unfair.

 

[Esotera]

The whole former bit implies that they don't cheat anymore, so definitely. I don't even have that much trouble dating cheaters (for the first half of the relationship anyway) as it adds a bit more excitement and pressure to a relationship.

 

[burningdragoon]

It depends really. If said person had cheated on every previous partner (not sure how this would come up, but hush) than that'd be a pretty big obstacle. If the person was in a long term relationship, was cheated on, and cheated in retaliation, then that would be less of an obstacle. And how do they view their cheating? A regrettable mistake? No bid deal? Lots of factors go into these things. It would probably never have neutral or better impact on the decision though.

For the other things, sure I guess. Assuming "former" means "did but no longer" and not "did and hasn't happened again" I don't see an issue.

 

[Zykon TheLich_v1legacy]

Cheater... probably not, although as the 1st poster said, it's unlikely they're going to tell you about it and all sorts of shit and accusations fly can around in breakups so taking other peoples' word on "X is a cheating whatever" isn't something I'd necessarily do.

I have no problem with current party girls or addicts, as long as I liked them enough anyway that wouldn't be much of an issue so former isn't really a bother. Chances are it would all go horribly wrong in the end, but that's just par for the course.

 

[StriderShinryu]

I don't see the problem with it unless you somehow know it's a habitual thing. People make mistakes and often do learn from them. Once a cheater, always a cheater only means something if the cheater doesn't feel regret or change their attidude. It's far from an absolute.

 

[konor77]

This site really doesn't like cheaters does it...
When my parents met at least one of them was in a relationship with another person, so functional long term relationships can come of cheating. While i've never cheated on a significant other i'd have no problem sleeping with someone that was in a relationship and have advised friends to do so.

 

[krazykidd]

Sure . I've cheated in the past , iv'e dated past cheaters, it's like a normal relationship . My current girlfriend has never cheated but she has been the "other woman" , doesn't bother me one bit . Actually i'm trying to convince her to get a "play mate" so that she can tone it down in the bedroom . She wants it ALL THE TIME, so annoying .

Now , ask me if i'm a jelouse man

 

[DugMachine]

Probably but if you cheat on me after we date then you can just kiss my ass.

 

[Hagi]

If it was a once-off mistake that happened years ago I would want a good explanation and some assurance that they've changed (hence the years ago, change takes time) but I'd be willing to give it a chance.

If it's something that they do more frequently or recently no freaking way. They obviously don't view relationships as I do and as such it wouldn't work.

There's a lot of fish in the sea as they say and plenty of them haven't cheated frequently or recently. Why the hell would I pick one that has?

Captcha: Love you

I don't know Captcha... I don't know... You're not in a committed relationship are you?

 

[Rose and Thorn]

Only to cheat on them! Harhahahaharhaha....uhhhhh.

Payback.

 

[bojackx]

Yup.

If I were to shun every person who had ever done something stupid or worthy of regret then I would be a very lonely fellow.

Yep, this pretty much sums it up.

It's only if these people were still being assholes that I would avoid a relationship with them.

 

[NearLifeExperience]

I would, I'm no angel myself. People do stupid shit sometimes.

 

[bleys2487]

Absolutely not. Been a victim of a cheater who repeated apologized and repeatedly did it.

Control your primal urges and keep it in your pants. Goes the same for ladies.

I'm an advocate of people never really change.

 

[laggyteabag]

Me and this girl got really close, and I started to like her pretty quickly, after about 2 weeks she had admitted to me that she had cheated on her ex, and I was surprisingly cool with it. Admittedly, owe never got anywhere, but fact is it didn't bother me, but if I got cheated on I would flip.

Captcha - Row jimmy row

YES JIMMY! I BELIEVE IN YOU!

 

[DanielBrown]

I have, and I have also very often been "the other guy".
Don't think I'd manage a serious relationship with a cheater however. Depends on the circumstances and how far in the past it was. We all did stupid shit when we were young(er).