WTF Australia?!?!?!

[wooty]

As cool as place as Australia is, it sometimes seems that its an area of the planet in which humans should not be able to survive.

 

[johnnnny guitar]

well good brown snakes are fuckin everywhere and they are dangerous as fuck no joke last week I was walking to the store to buy some mlk and one of them fucking came out of the bushes right next to me they are everywhere now

 

[Ouroboros0977]

-I saw a wombat fuck up another wombat (who knew that they even fought)

I am ready for this... *ahem* MORTAL WOMBAT!

 

[not_you]

Australian for most of my life... And yeah, the thing is, sure, the spider is huge... But it's not the thing you need to be careful of...

There are MUCH deadlier species of spiders on this mass of land... When you run into a family of red-back spiders or funnel-webs; THAT is when you run away...

OT: How do we destroy them...?
With fire...
Kill it with fire...

 

[ClockworkPenguin]

I think Australia sort of happened because God was messing around with increasingly bad-ass animals, and then made this scorching hot island, and just sat back to see what would win.

I take it as proof that God loves the British, the most dangerous things we have to deal with are badgers and Glasgow.

 

[DSK-]

I for one would like to welcome our new eight-legged overlords!

 

[Wintermoot]

holly shit I think saw a life bar above the spider.

 

[Titan Buttons]

I love my country always full of surprises

 

[android88]

The same way we do with the other billion weird and dangerous wildlife in Australia, don't think about it.

 

[Bucky01]

-A guest got fucked up by a koala that she tried to touch (retard)

you must have mistaken a ravenous creature for a koala... those cute little furry things can't be that bad... especially if they sleep all day

when the last time you pestered someone that's hungry, tired and has sharp claws trying to sleep and escaped unscathed?

OT: lived in Aus my whole life (20 years). came across the occasional white-tip spider and they all met with the back of my boot multiple times. has never seen a snake outside of a zoo. its not a giant deathtrap so grow a pair ya wuss.

but if i did have to warn about anything id say the bullshark. that shark is more dangerous than any other shark out there mostly because it can survive in BOTH freshwater and seawater.

 

[Steeveeo]

Discussion value: The spiders. How do we destroy them?

In my twenty years in this country I have been attacked by
-A king brown snake (survival tip 1-thick pants)
-A roo
-An Emu
-A cockatoo (fuckers can bite like all hell)
-Magpaies, lots of magpies.
-A saltie, (thank fuck I got behind that fence)
-All of the spiders (except white tails)
-a scorpian
-as well as a whole swathe of non-native animals
In addtion
-a frill necked lizard put my uncle in hospital
-I saw a wombat fuck up another wombat (who knew that they even fought)
-A guest got fucked up by a koala that she tried to touch (retard)
- A mate got stung by a platypus.

Nuke the site from orbit, it's the only way to be sure.

 

[Hazy992]

<img width=350>http://spidervalley.com/images/Snow_Spider.jpg

YOU CANNOT ESCAPE

Oh great! :/

It's still not as horrifying as the (Australian) tree that shoots poisonous needles at all living things that approach it...

WTAF?! WHYYYYY?! What is wrong with you people?!

 

[Hazy992]

Just when I'd heard it all, just when I thought Australian wildlife couldn't get any more terrifying; fucking SNAKE-EATING SPIDER!! [http://news.ninemsn.com.au/national/8454494/giant-queensland-spider-devours-snake] It's a spider. And it eats snakes. What. The. FUCK.

This is why I could never go to Australia. Even knowing this was on the same land mass as me would scare the shit out of me. Hell I'm having trouble with the fact it's on the same planet as me! How the hell do you guys not go insane?!

Discussion value: The spiders. How do we destroy them?

Cracked.com [http://www.cracked.com/search/search.php?sa=search&q=Australia] is your friend. (Or Enemy depending on how you feel about Australian fauna.)

Ah yes Cracked. They introduced me to the terror of giant blue earthworms

Spoiler: WHERE IS YOUR GOD NOW?

pfft, you kidding?
we got worms that'll chew their way into your flesh.

tip, wear boots.

You know, you guys really aren't encouraging me to go to Australia

 

[Hazy992]

I'm not going insane because I live on the other side of the planet and I challenge that spider to come survive a Canadian winter.

You know what, fuck it I'm moving to Antarctica. Let's see them get me there!

Have fun in Antartica...

Spoiler

Yes I know it's actually a sea spider but still rather intimidating.

Although I love spiders. And snakes. Why am I not in australia again?

Fuck it, I'm going to Mars

 

[Hazy992]

I'm not going insane because I live on the other side of the planet and I challenge that spider to come survive a Canadian winter.

You know what, fuck it I'm moving to Antarctica. Let's see them get me there!

Spoiler: I think Iv got someone who'd like to say hello

"How y'all doin?"

Say hello to the Arctic sea spider.

OT: Isn't that a Golden Orb weaver? Yea, they're nasty pasties. There was a vid of one of those munching on a birdy not too long ago.

That is not a spider, that is a goddamn Facehugger! D:

 

[Danzavare]

In my twenty years in this country I have been attacked by
-A king brown snake (survival tip 1-thick pants)
-A roo
-An Emu
-A cockatoo (fuckers can bite like all hell)
-Magpaies, lots of magpies.
-A saltie, (thank fuck I got behind that fence)
-All of the spiders (except white tails)
-a scorpian
-as well as a whole swathe of non-native animals
In addtion
-a frill necked lizard put my uncle in hospital
-I saw a wombat fuck up another wombat (who knew that they even fought)
-A guest got fucked up by a koala that she tried to touch (retard)
- A mate got stung by a platypus.

Do you live in a country town and/or zoo?

On topic: I can't blame you for being paranoid, I'm convinced 90% of Americans are gun-toting hics waiting to rob and kill me. It made my time in Texas extra fun. <.<;

A country town, but most of this happened in other country towns

I see, so they are as scary as they say.

Captcha: run farther

 

[Jegsimmons]

The same way we do with the other billion weird and dangerous wildlife in Australia, don't think about it.

that may work until you fall asleep and the little fuckers have laid eggs in your eyes and the mother is literally eating out you ass hole while you scream but its too late and the eggs hatched, went through your brain, shat, and another mother is makeing its way leg first through your mouth from your stomach with the nasty-est taste imaginable and a mother fucking WETA crawls out from behind your eye!!!!


OH DEAR JESUS I CAN TOUCH THE FLOOR ANYMORE!!!!!!! EVERYTHING IS FUCKING LAVA!!!!!

 

[Idsertian]

Ok, how bad could this be? (follows link)

GAAAAH! WHAT IN THE NAME OF HELL IS THAT ABOMINATION?!

Seriously, fuck that. How do Australians deal with living in a country where the food chain is so horribly violated on every level?

Oh yeah, and stonefish. Gotta love dem stonefish.

Registers 10 on the Fuckenstein meter, don't you know?

 

[Lunar Templar]

>.>

i decided a LONG time ago, after a particularly LONG stint on cracked, that Australia is not where i want to go, at all. way to much shit wants me dead

 

[Goofguy]

I'm not going insane because I live on the other side of the planet and I challenge that spider to come survive a Canadian winter.

never challenge nature, it will fuck your day up, on tomorrow's news a new breed of super spider that can swim,run and tunnel at 60mph is the size of a cat and can survive any temperature between -100 and 100 degrees Celsius

Come at me, spider. I've got Jack Johnson, Tom O'Leary and my swinging cod.