You are the last person on Earth


Resident Furry Pimp
May 8, 2011
game-lover said:
I'd probably mostly eat. And read some books. It's all I could truly do.

No one to run the networks for TV. Or theaters for the movies I wanna watch. Maybe steal a bicycle. Best way to get around. Can't drive yet. No one to teach me now.

With no people to run most of the good stuff, I wouldn't be getting to have much fun, I imagine.
It'll be a hell of a lot easier to teach yourself to drive when there's nobody on the road. Driving isn't the complicated part as the road-signs are pretty obvious around here, It's avoiding the other people and maintaining your vehicle that'll get'cha.

As for me, I'd probably do the same when the power died. I'd carry my laptop for as long as I could, finding batteries to keep it juiced. I'd re-learn how to write and keep a journal (Computer-geek printing... Euuuggghhh~) I'm not much of a book-reader, but damn, I'd have to learn to be one.

I'd probably rummage through the local libraries and internet(While it's around) for knowledge, provided denial didn't set in right away, I'd arm myself with a sledge-hammer to break into people's homes to steal resources and warmth. I'd probably hit up the local police station in the same way too, because those dogs that people keep are gonna get hungry... and there are some big fucking dogs around here. If I can pick them off from a distance, it'd be better than relying on a sledge. I'd also have to look around in a hospital. I might find something I need. And, on top of things, the NSLC. Cause I'm gonna need a lot of booze.

Once Gasoline expired, back to the bike. I'd probably head to Maine, and maybe a bit further south into the states where the weather is warmer, and I won't have to worry about freezing to fucking death. All the while constantly checking my cellphone hoping to get a hold of friends and family. If I'm truly alone, so be it...


New member
Apr 15, 2009
Thinking about I am Legend and other post-apocalypse stories... I would secure the library, the generators. Try to learn how to fly the airplanes, how to drive a car. Use the airport to secure on of the seven (12?) internet server hubs. Try to collect as much of human data as possible before it expires. Get all the games.
Probably visit a few of the great cities before they are destroyed, perhaps collect precious books and records. Also look for survivors. Then visit universities, some new fangled technologies I would like in my life. Air to gasoline, wireless electricity.
And then: differentiated stem cells, artificial embryos and artificial womb research. Perhaps I could clone myself, and thus keep the human race going. If there were any tissue or other samples (blood banks, sperm banks) I could use that DNA to repopulate humanity. It would be a lot of work, and I suppose my dream of ruling the world would be produced.


New member
Oct 25, 2008
Go to the cop station, grab a lot of gear. Use said gear to enter houses etc, first getting a fuck ton of food and then proceeding to loot a pharmacy. Probably explore the insides of the town, then queen's palace and then travel I guess. Other than that there is reading and probably a way to get electricity but those things are not on top of the list of things to do.

I'll probably get a pet dog to keep me company and write a journal of what I experience and feel. Eventually as probably everyone will, I'll go insane from the lack of human interaction.

I will research religion at least, because with nobody else I will probably give that a chance, what else is there to live for otherwise?

I'll stay the fuck away from any power station though, who knows what could have gone wrong with no humans to regulate them.


New member
Nov 10, 2010
Amuse myself for a while whilst enjoying the peace and quiet.

When I eventually get tired of that, lay hands on a firearm (if I haven't already) and finish the job this mysterious event began.


New member
Feb 7, 2009
Drink beer, eat food, smoke lots and lots of cigarettes.

Try to travel somewhere warm, and do all the drugs I can find before finally committing suicide.

Soviet Steve

New member
May 23, 2009
I'd check the various top US government spots and area 51 to see what everyone was hiding and after that probably descend into hedonism in a palace somewhere.


New member
Jul 12, 2009
I'd be very, very confused.
Then I'd start searching for survivers and that'd be one hell of an adventure I suppose.
At some point most likely go insane.

Not Matt

Senior Member
Nov 3, 2011
IT'S FUN TIME (followed by a quick suicide...yay)
i would have made the world unrecognizable. first of all.

1. i would high jack TV. every screen in the world would have a picture of my glaring face on it. especially places like time square and Piccadilly circus.

2. i would blow up an entire city. a large one. just for the fun of watching it blow up. ka-boom. then, gone.

3. i would do everything on my do-before-i-die list

4. i would live on the top floor of the Burj Khalifa building in Dubai (world tallest building)

5. in case humanity returned i would some how make my self seem like a god. don't know how i will do that but i'll think of that when i face that problem.

6. finally get to read that book i bought but never got to reading cause i have been to caught up with work.

7. BURN MY SCHOOL/OFFICE TO THE GROUND. admit it. we have all wanted to do this.

8. cry over all the people i miss.

9. steal puppets and manikins from clothe shops and madam Tussaud and scatter them around my home town pretending they are real people.

10. go insane for loneliness (as number 9 would heavily imply)

11. die

not a happy ending but a true one.


New member
Dec 24, 2011
Clone myself repeatedly.

Get as many games as I can legitly handle.

Gaming clan all day baby.

Create more clones to do the labor intensive shit (food growth, etc.).

Dominate entire nations with the TephlonPrices.

Be one with the TephlonPrice.


New member
Jun 28, 2010
Well, after crying and panicking for several hours, I'd probably stock up on food and water, go find myself a nice car and start driving. Go check some others countries, no matter how far the distance. I got all the time in the world.


New member
Oct 15, 2011
I would create a giant middle finger symbol that can be seen from space. In the center of that formation I will build a strange temple where I will explain to any potential alien visitors the meaning behind the symbol. The moment they leave the temple this will trip a system that will launch the worlds nuclear warheads towards the temple because....seriously F U universe.

no but seriously that kinda scenario would depress me to hell. The one thing i fear the most is humanity ending and our existence being forgotten because that would mean everything we ever done was completely meaningless.

So what would I really do? Find some way to preserve as much about humanity as possible so that another race (either alien or earth sentient life 2.0) could find it and hopefully read it. That way our story, our struggle as a race lives on and that maybe it was not all for naught. Maybe our story could serve as a lesson for others, maybe it was not all meaningless.

How I would do this I do not have a single flippin clue. But hey, i got time and im a quick learner when I need to be.


Bah weep grah nah neep ninny bom
Nov 20, 2008
Without my girlfriend, there is no point in being god anymore.

I abdicate.

Zack Alklazaris

New member
Oct 6, 2011
Fappy said:
I would go forth and collect ALL OF THE CATS!

The "Cat King" they shall call me... well, that's what future generations of nu-men will call me. Men that evolve from cats!

I love this I would most likely do this since I pretty much have a feral cat army to begin with.


I'd honestly would study up on rocket launch procedures and learn programming. Then set up NASAs mission control computer to an automated status and blast off in space.

Don't care how long I can stay up there or what happens after. Just really always wanted to go to space.

I'll bring the cats too. They can be space kitties.


New member
Nov 29, 2008
The kitten pile begins.

I'd go around breaking trapped pets out of their homes so they have a better chance of living the rest of their short lives off the land.

Pray to gawd I die of old age before all nuclear power plants go into meltdown.

Be thankful that I've watched "Aftermath: Population Zero" & "Life After People."

Stock up on books for wilderness survival, canned goods & pet food & water bottles, cut wood for winter, stock up on sweaters, learn to farm, rely on herbs instead of medicine.

Entertainment: Books, comics, battery-powered handheld anything that plays video games & music, sudoku, cards, board games, puzzles.

Learn how to use different kinds of guns for when bears & wolves start roaming the city.

Evil Smurf

Admin of Catoholics Anonymous
Nov 11, 2011
So no more Internet porn? Nooo!

Loot a bottle shop, drink ALL THE ALCOHOL! Die of alcohol poisoning


Stuck in a vortex of sexy horses
Jun 27, 2011
Marcus Kehoe said:
I hate cloning, but I'd find a way to make a human female clone, once perfected I would make an army of Olivia Wilde clones and repopulate the earth.

If that wouldn't work(it would) Then I would make war against the moon and remake the nation of equsetira with genetically engineered ponies.

If that fail's( possibly) I'd probably wright a book then travel to Vatican and poop in the pope's hat, no hate towards the pope but by that time i'd be out of thing;s to do.
Sorry to break it to you, but the process of cloning requires a woman that can carry the child. So that plan is screwed!


New member
Jul 10, 2009
Kill myself properly: Shotgun to the dick.