your drunken mistakes.

[similar.squirrel]

Coloured my gentleman-sausage in with a sharpie. It stung. Oh, and the many times I vomited. And flirted with men despite being straight.

The usual shit. Never fucked my cousin like megaraccoon, though.

 

[KiKiweaky]

And few months after, hooking up with the most hideous girl in the club (everyone's been there )

Hey fat chicks need loving too right

I got with one before that was so big my friends could only see my hands when I was standing behind her..... I gag whenever I think about it.

Another one would be thinking I was good at ice surfing (you know hands out to either side and all that) on the way home from the pub, tried to slide down the path but instead pulled a 180 and landed on the side of my head. It hurt alot but I didnt split myself open and just ended up with a sizeable lump for a few days haha.

Going for shots when your already wasted is never a good idea either, I dont do it anymore. Sticking with pints of larger for now <3

 

[Polock]

Made out with a chick I probably shouldn't of.

 

[orangebandguy]

Lmao. Nice purchase there.

 

[KiKiweaky]

pissing against a glass fronted building with the top of my head against the glass to hold me up only to look up after i had finished and see two men at a reception desk and realising it was a police station.

at which point i tried to waddle away, my pants fell down and i fell in my own piss.

then i tried to haul myself up by getting a grip on a glass wall with my piss soaked hands...

the guys were laughing so hard by the time they came out they didn't even charge me although i did spend the night in the cells.

i only know the details of this because in the morning they told me and for added hilarity on their part played back the CCTV tape on a projector thing in the interview room where about 8 of the morning shift or whatever came in just to watch it...

Easily the funniest story I've read so far haha.

 

[Zantos]

I came in at 4am and decided it was a really good idea to open my bedside drawer and take a whizz in it. Took ages to clean up.

 

[Sieg Firebrand]

Wow, umm. Well there's kicking a large concrete boulder with my foot, breaking a cinema chair by trying to use it as a springboard, throwing a phone at a policeman and probably worst of all was sleeping in the woods near my friends house coz we couldn't be arsed to walk up the hill, when we woke up six hours later it was raining and my friend woke up next to a pile of poo

 

[Kevonovitch]

the worst proly was when i decided to prank call my mom, while i was drunk, 3x in 1h. and any time i woke up not remembering anything, ie who ia m, where i am, whats going on, who anyone is, ect, for a while X_X the worst of that, was waking up, cuddling the toilet bowl, a blanket covering me, a glass of water within arms reach, and just my t-shirt on. good times...

 

[Neo10101]

lets see drunken mistakes from when i was 13 to now at 22?
1. banged my cousin
2. beat the crap otta an copper
3. ran scraming naked through cwmbran town center
4. took a train to chedder gorge after three days of drunkenly hopping on and of various trains cuz i had no money
5. banged my teacher
6. got my ass kicked in swansea
7. stormed through a wedding and told the groom his missus cheated on him with his brother
8. ran naked through a brewery and got arrested
9. played halo then thought i was in the game and freaked out
10. ran into a wall
and finally got a boat to ireland and woke up in belfast with a bar maid named jessica
umm thats it im afraid dont drink as much as i used too and probably wont ever again....ok maybe at my stag do but i'll have a week in advance.

All I have to say is that if even half of this is true then I am still amazingly impressed. Cudos on the teacher bang, that is automatic legendary status in any school.

 

[WrongSprite]

Well when I passed out, my mates stuck Doritos in between my toes, then let a dog lick them off.

That's just weird.

Not technically my fault I suppose...I guess I'll have to say girls. Drunk mistakes always involve girls.

 

[Magicman10893]

The dumbest one was going to a Halloween Party dressed as Judd Nelson's character from the Breakfast Club and thinking it was a good idea to burn myself on the forearm with a cigar to match the character better. Although, there was some good in it. My friend and I both burned ourselves as a "manliness" competition and he yelled out in pain and had to make 3 attempts to brand himself, while I took it like a man with no reaction what-so-ever and everyone got scared because of me for a while. Now, my right arm is about half covered in scar tissue, between the scars from my car accident and the scar from a folding lawn chair... don't ask.

 

[Loop Stricken]

im a little tipsy and i just bought a new 1080 inch LED monitor from amazon. probably a mistake, any funny drunken mistakes you made recently.

Jesus that's huge.

Hm. Mistakes whilst drunk... I can only think of one; about three weeks ago whilst drunk I spun around in a "friend's" kitchen and smacked my thumb up against the wall.
The nail is still black.

 

[Astoria]

Just the usual not realising I'm drunk and so drinking more and only realsing I was drunk when I've woken up the next morning to see a lot less alcohol left in the bottle than I intended and thinking how dirty the bathroom floors have gotten.

 

[headshotcatcher]

And few months after, hooking up with the most hideous girl in the club (everyone's been there )

Hey fat chicks need loving too right

I got with one before that was so big my friends could only see my hands when I was standing behind her..... I gag whenever I think about it.

Another one would be thinking I was good at ice surfing (you know hands out to either side and all that) on the way home from the pub, tried to slide down the path but instead pulled a 180 and landed on the side of my head. It hurt alot but I didnt split myself open and just ended up with a sizeable lump for a few days haha.

Going for shots when your already wasted is never a good idea either, I dont do it anymore. Sticking with pints of larger for now <3

Fat isn't that bad, it's fat + butterface that's a killer