Your Favorite Zero Punctuation Quote

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Athol

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In all reality, pretty much anything he's said in any of his reviews, but I am kinda partial to "pant on head retarded" as I use it often in my daily life.
 

ewhac

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"The game is by the delightfully-named Starbreeze Studios, whose most notable previous title would be The Chronicles of Riddick: Escape from Butcher Bay, in which players piloted the claymation Vin Diesel in his ongoing quest to masturbate himself raw in the faces of audiences worldwide. Anyway..."

-- The Darkness review
 

theuberlord

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Sep 16, 2010
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too human

"and the hammer is made of wank"

oh it made all the hours watching that damn valkerie seem almost worth it
 

ewhac

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"Personally, at this point, I'd only consider buying The Darkness if it came down to budget price. And they threw in another, better game. ...And some cake. ...And Belgium."
 

thegamermn

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"Like that serial killer that lurks under your bed and is standing behind you right now but don't look because that will really piss him off!"

The whole review was awesome.
 

Akelzero

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From Assassin's Creed 2

"Being European, there's an old saying I'm quite fond of: In heaven, the food is Italian, the police officers are British, the platformers are French, the shooters are Croatian, and it's all run by two international software giants and an electronics corporation. In hell, the food it British, the shooters are Canadian, and I forget the rest but basically the gist of the saying is that Italians are all tossers."

Also from AC2:

"The story gets a little hard to follow around the middle, not helped at all by several arbitrary jumps forward in time. After one mission for example, it suddenly jumps to Ezio sitting on a bench two years later when some lady comes up and hands him some evidence she took from the scene of his mission two years ago. What the fuck was she waiting for, and why was Ezio's first reaction not to slap her across the tits?!"

Sorry if they're a little long winded but i feel context is important.
 

ERS86

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ranyilliams said:
"Pants on head retarded"

cant remember the exact quote or the episode really but thats basically it...
Love that line. I try to incorporate it in to my every day speech!

F-I-D-O said:
"Why is war so mopey? He's FUCKING WAR! If I threw someone up into the air, sliced them 100 times with my sword, before impaling them and throwing their carcass over my shoulder, I wouldn't be crying. I'd be going HOLY SHIT! DID ANYONE SEE THAT? I AM A MONSTER TRUCK THAT WALKS LIKE A MAN"
Darksiders
I loved that episode
captcha: consider hutcha. I don't think the captcha watches very much ZP
Love that one too! I was thinking the same thing while playing the game. It's like I was having more fun than the character. He was so busy brooding and I was just having entirely too much fun ripping things to pieces and showing off how awesome I was.

My other favorites are...

From inFamous: "You can jump gleefully around on the rooftops like Down's syndrome Batman."
The animation for that part was just too much, showing a Batman with a "special" look on his face. I laughed to hard and so loud that I woke people up in another room.

From Mass Effect 2: "This is supposed to be an exciting space adventure. Commander Shepard should acquire them by shooting them out of a monster's face... or extracting them from the throats of alien hotties with his tongue."

Haha. Love me some Zero Punctuation. =D
 

Thaa'ir

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From Dead to Rights Retribution:

"I feel like Jack Slate is following the letter rather than the spirit of the law. A law completely unique to Jack Slate given to him by some kind of mad ocelot god that only he can see."

Ocelot god: KILL THE WHORES

From Minecraft:

"My non-American viewers, who understand that the world does not consist only of a single nation sailing across an infinite sea of Mexican migrant workers..."
 

Dfskelleton

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"This is your fault! Yes, You! Especially you, Adrian. I know that's probably not your name, but it was worth it to mess with the heads of all the Adrians out there.
That was hilarious.
 

ivan trolazo

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From RE5 regarding the inventory system:

"When both inventories are full... THE FUN BEGINS. Say I want to get an egg from my parten, she can't jst give it to me or pop it straight in into my mouth like a flirty dinner date. No, I have to give her my item, eat the egg and then ask it back, assuming she hasn't eaten it first.(Drawing of Sheva eating an AK 47)

Classic, just classic.
 

Hatiras

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Alpha Protocol

"He should just save time and mace himself every time he opens his fucking mouth"

Priceless
 

zyoto12

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Ozzythecat said:
Alpha Protocol

"Mike Thornton is the ponciest ponce to ponce by the poncing parlor"

I remember just laughing myself into a ball,
ninja'd. Would also like to add: "I am a monster truck that walks like a man"-Darksiders
 

Teh Roflchoppa

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"..And when manually aiming my pistol seemed more accurate than my rifle because my rifle sights look like I'm aiming down a F***ING BRICK" - New Vegas Review

Oh I almost choked to death laughing.
 

Klarinette

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DevilWolf47 said:
Prince of Persia Retrospective:

Never stick your dick in a pudding. Yeah it might still be good pudding and you can spend all day explaining it but nobody's gonna eat it because YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN IT.
Hahahaha, I love that one. Sound logic.

I like any of the ones where he belittles me and says something along the lines of 'yay for you'. It's just funny. And I like the metaphores he uses; I'm a fan of metaphores and use them frequently in my daily speech, which confuses the hell of the people who don't talk to me often enough to know that that's just what I do.
 

KingofallCosmos

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not especially my favourite, but:

Dead space 2

Everyone is as attached to their limbs as that mountain climber guy
 

garmaniac

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Aug 24, 2010
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The Sims 3

"I guess my point is all women are evil, bewitching us with their insidious emotions. Who needs them, incidentally I'm still not gay."

I watched this right after I got dumped recently, comforted me somehow. Thanks Yahtzee.
 

ImBigBob

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"Other ways to tempt fate in this universe include wearing a helmet, not having a sense of humor, and basically being anyone but the kind of person who would replace their genitals with a minigun if they thought they could get away with it and find something else they could piss out of."

"Sometimes, popular things are popular for a reason: Because they're good. Or because Will Smith is in it."

-Gears of War 2
 

Alphakirby

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May 22, 2009
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Simple "This is like Zelda meets There Will Be Blood!" (Note:Quote may not be 100% accurate)