Zero Punctuation: Assassin's Creed

[Tumbler360]

Brilliant!

Loved it, thank you for reviewing this game. Great fun to hear about this game.

I vote for Mass Effect next.

Hmm I wonder if having a vote system on next weeks review would be good for the site? I'd love to see what everyone else wants to see reviewed.

 

[Lisamagi]

Lol i love this guy so too the point but he made an error at one point in PopWw u dont run around to Linkin Park the songs are done by a band called Godsmack XD

 

[Hypersapien]

Last week's review seemed a little off, which I attributed to his pseudo-vacation and jet lag.

Ladies and gentlemen, HE'S BACK!

 

[Lord Scottish]

Funny as always. Now review 'Game X' or maybe 'Game Y'. After all, we pay your salary with our free forum accounts! Sigh. It makes me wonder how many of these Yahtzee "fans" ever read his updates on FR...

 

[the_carrot]

The descriptive part of your review is at odds with your overall feelings about the game. Given what you said it sounds like a profound drag at nearly every turn. Yet you say you liked it. I don't understand your having given it something of a thumbs up given your comments.

 

[Jenx]

I was expecting the comment about telling you what to review to be somewhere at the beginning, not in the end credits.

The review as a whole isn't my fave one so far, but the ending sure is. (and wow, I made an account just to say this?!)

 

[Panisismo]

The distances between the cities don't make sense, no. The piles of hay and the rooftop balconies don't make sense either. Neither does the combat system, with how you only get attacked by one man at a time. But none of this matters to me simply because the game is a shitload of fun. I actually enjoyed the combat, though. Perhaps I like sword combat too much, but the countering is extremely satisfying, and the way Altair moves just makes everything much more exciting. Sure, it's extremely tedious in the beginning, but after I got most of my abilities back (another part of the game that doesn't make sense. How can you lose the ability to tackle?) I found myself starting fights with groups of guards just so I can kill them. Ubisoft created a large, living, world and, sure, you're forced to make your own fun because just doing the missions is extremely repetitive, but I've spent 12+ hours playing the game and I can tell I'm going to be replaying Assassin's Creed for a long time.

It's like a mini Grand Theft Auto, except with boring missions. Even after I finished the GTA games I still kept playing them for months afterwards. Assassin's Creed has the same basic formula, except it's set a few years before the typical GTA game.

 

[MacCarth]

It's always a treat to see the issues I have with a game illustrated in stick figure form and coupled with well placed humor.

Zero Punctuation has become the highlight of my Wednesday. Thanks Yahtzee

 

[Zeldy]

I give this review three thumbs up.

 

[Hellgiver]

Nicely reviewed once again Yahtzee. I found the best way to deal with the sword battles was to try to make them feel as realistic as possible (a somewhat futile attempt, I know) by using as many different combat moves as possible, in order to make it not just slash slash slash counter slash slash slash counter. Actually throwing in random knife throws and step hits and combo kills, as well as grabbing and throwing off ledges helped make the sword battles more fun.

Also, it is a lot less fun to use only the long sword. Using the short sword and the hidden blade makes changes it up a bit. Use the hidden blade for counters only to see new ones, including putting the thing right into the side of enemies' heads, and use the short sword for quick combos and some of the coolest looking counters.

You are probably done with the game now, but that was my take on the combat. Also, I was surprised you didn't mention anything about how weird it was to have hundreds of flags strewn about the ancestor's memory. That was kind of puzzling to me.

 

[rhizic]

yet another awesome review, lovely the whole, why cant i slap around the lepers n beggers bit. great stuff

 

[Evilducks]

I found that assassinating the lepers and beggars made me a much happier person and I feel I was cleaning up the streets.

That or I kept to running at full speed across rooftops.

 

[The Irrelevant Gamer]

Great review as always. The use of Yakkity Sax was particularly hilarious.

 

[Jai galaar]

That was good. I know I tested my hidden blade out on the beggars on occasion. The combat certainly could be more fun with the short sword-though I think my utter favorite move was running, jumping into a guard, and burying the hidden blade in their neck.

But I think I'll get a lot of play out of this game.

 

[me_hi]

Kane and Lynch next!

Tear down Gamespot, Yahtzee!

i agree... give those bastards a good bash or two

 

[SacrificiaLamb]

See, his reviews don't have to be entirely negative for them to be funny. These things are not mutually exclusive.

And it also seems that the incessant whining has done some good. Maybe the Escapist will continue to send Yahtzee games that are actually worth reviewing. Mass Effect or The Witcher would be excellent choices - both decent and worthwhile games, with plenty of flaws to make fun.

 

[Zera]

Good stuff as usual and bonus points for the Benny Hill chase music.
*looks around*
Awful lot of newbs around here...

 

[VMerken]

Reasons for the Ass Creed anger? Maybe because Jade Raymond touted this title as a real next-gen killer app. And then, you get to see the lacking A.I., disappointing combat, repetitive chores err I mean, subquests, etc. PS3 owners also enjoyed game freezes, which - fortunately - has been corrected with a patch. What the patch didn't correct, though, is the screen tearing, weird overachieving anti-aliasing routine and sucky framerate compared to the Xbox 360 version. Which is very, shall we say, bizarre for a title which started out as a PS3 exclusive.

That aside, I agree with the review - decent, but not the next gen love fest it was made up to be. Still, some lovely vistas to enjoy. I love the way Yahtzee depicted Altair. And I also see he addressed the "I shall suggest thee a title to review" crowd, of which I am/have been a part of. Finally we know it's futile. Fine then, no more pitching The Witcher from me. Yahtzee, you have my word that from now on, The Witcher, nor any other game such as The Witcher or The Witcher-like games with the same kind of surprise hitty-ness such as The Witcher will no longer be suggested by me.

 

[blackadvent]

Reasons for the Ass Creed anger? Maybe because Jade Raymond touted this title as a real next-gen killer app. And then, you get to see the lacking A.I., disappointing combat, repetitive chores err I mean, subquests, etc. PS3 owners also enjoyed game freezes, which - fortunately - has been corrected with a patch. What the patch didn't correct, though, is the screen tearing, weird overachieving anti-aliasing routine and sucky framerate compared to the Xbox 360 version. Which is very, shall we say, bizarre for a title which started out as a PS3 exclusive.

That aside, I agree with the review - decent, but not the next gen love fest it was made up to be. Still, some lovely vistas to enjoy. I love the way Yahtzee depicted Altair. And I also see he addressed the "I shall suggest thee a title to review" crowd, of which I am/have been a part of. Finally we know it's futile. Fine then, no more pitching The Witcher from me. Yahtzee, you have my word that from now on, The Witcher, nor any other game such as The Witcher or The Witcher-like games with the same kind of surprise hitty-ness such as The Witcher will no longer be suggested by me.

Oh, I see what you did there. *Wink*