Zero Punctuation: Dragon Age: Origins

[Axeli]

Thank God I'm not the only one banging my head on the wall at the irony of high fantasy...

Even when the writers occasionally break away from the clichés it seems to be only to convince themselves that they aren't just copying a much better author. And they also fail to notice that they are still writing the sub-genre based on copying LoTR, no matter how much they try to change or deconstruct it.
A good fantasy author would write his own fantasy world and concept instead of trying to justify one that isn't their own and has been already explored so much that it can hardly be called even fantasy anymore.

 

[Mirroga]

One thing I spotted is that he apparently played the Console version, which unfortunately fails rather hard compared to the PC version. Bioware intentionally dumbed down the gameplay for the consoles, to avoid breaking the feeble little minds of the consoletards that haven't dealt with proper RPGs before.

The gameplay on the only real version (the console ones are pretenders at best), has extremely little in common with previous Bioware titles except possibly Baldur's Gate which wasn't one of the examples he trotted out in the review.

And there's that little nugget where he decided that there's very little difference in the game when you replay it, which is rather erroneous. Your choices through the game has quite remarkable impacts on the gameplay, and will result in very different endings. Hell, it'll change the last ten hours of gameplay quite substantially.

But I must say, as the Yahtzee whore I am, this is a delightful review. Now, where can one pick up the games from the contest I wonder?

What are the differences between the consoles and the PC version?

 

[Legion]

I can't believe that he complained that the game is too long. Wtf, I thought that playing a short game was bad and a reasonably-sized one was too boring. You can't really win with Yahtzee can you?

No. No you can't. It's why it worries me when people use ZP as a reference point for criticising games.

God of War, Gears of War and Killzone: Dull Browns and Grey.
Halo and Haze: Too bright and colourful.

 

[Keefas]

Great job Yahtzee. Much less Tolkien-comparisons than I expected. (Oh, come on. Who didn't have a strange feeling of deja vu after learning the plot synapsis?)

This is what former D&D nerds like me have been waiting for since Baldur's Gate 2.

 

[Thunderhorse31]

I haven't laughed this hard at a review in a while. It just goes to show that making fun of nerds is still the cheapest and easiest way to a laugh. Well done.

 

[Windowlicker]

what was with the picture of jessica alba? I think thats who that was anyway. @ 3:51

LOL

 

[theultimateend]

I can't believe that he complained that the game is too long. Wtf, I thought that playing a short game was bad and a reasonably-sized one was too boring. You can't really win with Yahtzee can you?

He didn't.

Or did he? Can someone tell me where he said the length was a bad thing?

 

[Ixal]

What are the differences between the consoles and the PC version?

In the PC version you can zoom out, move the camera freely while giving orders to your companions.
In the console versions you are locked into a "over the shoulder" perspective and can only switch characters. That makes it hard to keep the overview over the battlefield, place area effect spells/weapons and do flanking moves.

 

[Stabby Joe]

The most original standard fantasy game I played was Myth whose standard affair was only humans and dwarves with the latter NOT being axe users but rather medieval pyrotechnics, not combat.

As for the contest I got bored with the winner since like all internet based games they can't hold their own beyond a minute or two... meh, at least someone actually did something.

 

[Britisheagle]

Good stuff
I can deal with a Mass Effect game thats with swords instead of guns

 

[Distorted Stu]

I played the shout into headphone game. I just blasted my music, did the trick.. but i was unsure how iw as suppos eto win..

OT: Great review, i think il be getting DA:O at xmas =]

 

[Sethzard]

Great review, i'm surprised, i thought you would feel the same about it as you did mass effect. The first runner up (the imp one) was far better

 

[NickIsCool]

i think im doing it wrong

i got 15 hours in on this game, im half way through the book

and i still have a girlfriend

>.>

 

[CuddlyCombine]

I can't believe that he complained that the game is too long. Wtf, I thought that playing a short game was bad and a reasonably-sized one was too boring. You can't really win with Yahtzee can you?

He didn't say that it was too long, he just said that he hadn't reached the ending.

 

[GrinningManiac]

Good review

Don't care for the game, though

And hell, what is with these "FURST DURR HURR!!!1!" retards? Seriously, are you THAT inescapably lonely and unhappy?

 

[BlueInkAlchemist]

I'm glad that the cosmos was aligned properly so the space radiation allowed Yahtzee to review Dragon Age. He hit a variety of points about the game for better or worse and I have to say I don't disagree with him on any particular one. It's pretty interchangeable with other BioWare games but that said, BioWare's a highly decent developer and I, too, am still enjoying the story despite being 20+ hours into the game.

What are the differences between the consoles and the PC version?

In the PC version you can zoom out, move the camera freely while giving orders to your companions.
In the console versions you are locked into a "over the shoulder" perspective and can only switch characters. That makes it hard to keep the overview over the battlefield, place area effect spells/weapons and do flanking moves.

The ability to get the overhead view coupled with the indomitable keyboard/mouse interface makes me very, very glad I shelled out the extra cash for the PC version.

Oh, wait, the PC version is actually $10 cheaper in the US.

Suckers.

 

[SkullCap]

Fantasy/Adventure games are my area of enjoyment so when I can afford an XBOX 360, I will give Dragon Age Origins a try. Kudos sir for another excellent review. Any game that can make you prefer it to sleep means your either a perfectionist or the game is preferable to five more minutes of sleep.

I look forward to more work from you.

 

[Infiniteloop]

good review. I've also played 25 hours and GOTTEN NOWHERE


PC version is better btw

 

[Dr. Stupid]

Even having played for 25 hours, he still managed one of his best reviews yet, where he makes a lot of fun of the game and a little of himself for liking it so much. Agree with everything, from the Bible-like adherence to Tolkien's version of fantasy to Bioware's crazy idea that players are going to read their in-game fantasy phone books.

Even so, I haven't started ACII yet because I keep wanting to do another 5 minutes to resolve just one more DA:O plot line.

 

[Eventidal]

With all the criticism, I thought he might somehow not like the game, but it turns out even Yahtzee can't completely dismiss this game on standard RPG cliche alone.