Zero Punctuation: God of War: Chains of Olympus

[Ptrack_Git]

Another stellar review (even if it was a bit short, but then again so is the game so what do want). BTW the "F*ck You" button is easily the greatest sequel to the obligatory "Panic button, easily blowing the Office Max "Easy" button clear out of the watter... then out of the sky. I really wish I hadn't used the words easy and easily in the same sentence, I guess I could have used handily, but I'll just push the "F*ck You" button instead (see how great that works).

 

[the_importer]

Oh good, you decided to review a game for which you actually like the genre and with it came back your usual standards.

This just in, you suck when your review games from outside your genre tastes, so stay away from fighting games and JRPGs.

 

[Lzdarkangel]

Y'know, where are all these girls coming from? Do girls play or even care about video games now? This isn't some sort of sick joke, is it? You ARE real people, right?

girls play games i had a mate who had a g/f who would play racin games and she would join in on the soul calibur fightin ring altho was very annoyin picked klik all the time and would use an unavoidable move all the fecking time but then i picked siegfreed (i kno i spelt it wrong)and impaled the ***** on my huge sword eeewwwww

 

[SomeBritishDude]

Nice review yahtzee. I actually never played a GoW game, and, concidering I've sold my ps2 and the psp is gathering dust in a dark corner of my cuboard (most money I've ever wasted that thing) I doubt I ever will, till that sword wielding pysco makes the slow painful transition from the glorious if elderly ps2 to the money grabbing technological monster that is next gen

 

[annoyingnitpicker]

Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love Yahtzee but this is about the third review where he has pronounced a word, if not incorrectly, then in a way I've never heard before.

I can't remember the other two times but in this case it was "respite" which I have always heard pronounced RE - SPITE (same way as "spiteful") rather than RE_SPIT (same way as "spit at someone")

And I don't think its a cultural thing, as I'm English. Unless it's an Ozzie thing and he has been there too long?

I'm genuinely curious, not a troll. Yahtzee is the man, as proved by the "clumsily finger a robot prostitute" line.

 

[Lzdarkangel]

Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love Yahtzee but this is about the third review where he has pronounced a word, if not incorrectly, then in a way I've never heard before.

I can't remember the other two times but in this case it was "respite" which I have always heard pronounced RE - SPITE (same way as "spiteful") rather than RE_SPIT (same way as "spit at someone")

And I don't think its a cultural thing, as I'm English. Unless it's an Ozzie thing and he has been there too long?

I'm genuinely curious, not a troll. Yahtzee is the man, as proved by the "clumsily finger a robot prostitute" line.

who cares? apart from you?

 

[NezumiiroKitsune]

An excellent and most amusing review, as usual i enjoyed it thoroughly. Me and Ellen discussed the possibility she watches only because she has an underlying desire to fuck Yahtzee. We agreed that's probably the reason we both watch them Oh yes

I made a comment on the structuring of your reviews but I doubt you read these personally he who is Yahtzee judge of pwnsome, hand of +10 review, and you certainly are now making a mental note never to read anything posted by me again after that. Well this week its still on form, structured well, points clearly made, and jokes (however true) understood and well written flowing with the rest of the review. Quite a few small text witticisms in this review which gives it almost as much replay value as SSBB, Condemned 2, or Burnout Legends Burnout Legends by far, my favourite, on the basis of it making me laugh until I needed punching. I believe the twist on reality of it, making everything appear exaggerated yet true to an extent of "How did I not notice this before?!", having all along known there were no people apart from this DJ Atomica in the game but regardless having it portrayed in such a way that it makes you view it in the light you placed it in, made it ceaselessly amusing. I suppose I'm trying to say, remarks of the frailty of logic and truths twisted in an extremely exaggerated way are very funny All the best

NKitsune

 

[Fangface74]

Does GTA really need another review from anyone on this planet? Crisis Core would be good, though.

Quicky Crisis Core rev

Modulating Phase
7 2 7!

iew: the story is completely incomprehensible unle

Modulating Phase
1 4 1!

ss you've played Final Fantasy VII, and the co

Modulating Phase
3 3 3!
Power Surge!

mbat keeps on getting interrupted by the stupid DMW. Even if it winds up coming up with nothing.

So if you want to continue the story of Final Fantasy VII, remember who Zack is, and understand the relationship between JENOVA and Sephiroth, go for it.

Otherwise, stay far, far away.

Fantastic, just what I was after! Jobs a good 'un.

 

[annoyingnitpicker]

"who cares? apart from you?"

This is the internet, it's so full of trolls, grammar nazis and other people with nothing better to do, that surely someone else cares?

That's why I posted to see if I had been saying "respite" wrong all these years.

Another question might be "If you don't care, then why did you take the time to reply to me?"

 

[Rjak]

Yahtzee you're getting SO predictable.

I was over at Kotaku and I saw your COO review posted and immediately I thought, "Ok lemme guess ... I'm gonna click this video and be thoroughly entertained for the following few minutes. I'm going to watch it multiple times, chuckle through the whole thing and laugh out loud at least three or four times, and there will be at least one OMG HE DIDNT'T JUST SAY THAT moment."

As always I thoroughly enjoyed the post and laughed my knob off, and this is getting quite tedious. You need to break up this pattern of constant humor and originality. Try repeating yourself, ripping off GameSpot, or just simply posting a ZP that sucks!!! Did you ever think of that?

So yea ... try a few reviews that absolutely suck ... you need a few curves in the road ...

 

[Lzdarkangel]

An excellent and most amusing review, as usual i enjoyed it thoroughly. Me and Ellen discussed the possibility she watches only because she has an underlying desire to fuck Yahtzee. We agreed that's probably the reason we both watch them Oh yes

I made a comment on the structuring of your reviews but I doubt you read these personally he who is Yahtzee judge of pwnsome, hand of +10 review, and you certainly are now making a mental note never to read anything posted by me again after that. Well this week its still on form, structured well, points clearly made, and jokes (however true) understood and well written flowing with the rest of the review. Quite a few small text witticisms in this review which gives it almost as much replay value as SSBB, Condemned 2, or Burnout Legends Burnout Legends by far, my favourite, on the basis of it making me laugh until I needed punching. I believe the twist on reality of it, making everything appear exaggerated yet true to an extent of "How did I not notice this before?!", having all along known there were no people apart from this DJ Atomica in the game but regardless having it portrayed in such a way that it makes you view it in the light you placed it in, made it ceaselessly amusing. I suppose I'm trying to say, remarks of the frailty of logic and truths twisted in an extremely exaggerated way are very funny All the best

NKitsune

duh wrong quote we have ourselves a yahtzee fanboy nearly said nazi

 

[Lzdarkangel]

"who cares? apart from you?"

This is the internet, it's so full of trolls, grammar nazis and other people with nothing better to do, that surely someone else cares?

That's why I posted to see if I had been saying "respite" wrong all these years.

Another question might be "If you don't care, then why did you take the time to reply to me?"

because i have nothin better to do or thought you should know because everyone else would just ignore you and i'm nice and dont ignore people no matter how annoyin or nit picky

 

[NezumiiroKitsune]

An excellent and most amusing review, as usual i enjoyed it thoroughly. Me and Ellen discussed the possibility she watches only because she has an underlying desire to fuck Yahtzee. We agreed that's probably the reason we both watch them Oh yes

I made a comment on the structuring of your reviews but I doubt you read these personally he who is Yahtzee judge of pwnsome, hand of +10 review, and you certainly are now making a mental note never to read anything posted by me again after that. Well this week its still on form, structured well, points clearly made, and jokes (however true) understood and well written flowing with the rest of the review. Quite a few small text witticisms in this review which gives it almost as much replay value as SSBB, Condemned 2, or Burnout Legends Burnout Legends by far, my favourite, on the basis of it making me laugh until I needed punching. I believe the twist on reality of it, making everything appear exaggerated yet true to an extent of "How did I not notice this before?!", having all along known there were no people apart from this DJ Atomica in the game but regardless having it portrayed in such a way that it makes you view it in the light you placed it in, made it ceaselessly amusing. I suppose I'm trying to say, remarks of the frailty of logic and truths twisted in an extremely exaggerated way are very funny All the best

NKitsune

duh wrong quote we have ourselves a yahtzee fanboy nearly said nazi

Heh close, English Language student If I happen to watch alot of Yahtzee all the merrier.

 

[Lzdarkangel]

yeah but treatin him like a god like figure is not cool its just incredibly sad as is us all posting our comments but you've entered another world of sad

 

[cmdr_zoom]

I laughed so much at 2:15 ("girlfriends") I had to wind back and watch it again before continuing.

Thank you for another Wednesday afternoon's entertainment, and incidentally for showing a keen understanding of what makes GoW (any of them, like you said) such over-the-top bloody-minded fun.

 

[NezumiiroKitsune]

yeah but treatin him like a god like figure is not cool its just incredibly sad as is us all posting our comments but you've entered another world of sad

/hug

There there, we all love you, just let it out. Let it all out.

 

[Lzdarkangel]

yeah but treatin him like a god like figure is not cool its just incredibly sad as is us all posting our comments but you've entered another world of sad

/hug

There there, we all love you, just let it out. Let it all out.

lols i'm right tho i mean we could all be sleeping or even playin our favourite games or even go out into the big wide world but that might be a little scary for some of you you might need someone to hold your hand so i nominate NezumiiroKitsune to go around the world holdin peoples hand when they step out there front door for the first time in a long time.