Zero Punctuation: Haze

Yahtzee Croshaw

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Aug 8, 2007
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Haze

Drug-addled mercenaries wearing glowing power armor trudging through the jungle with guns. What could possibly go wrong?

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RetiarySword

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Apr 27, 2008
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Very nice, it is quite weird how the allies sudenly switch to extreme regen mode and the super soldiers become weaker than infants. Very nice
 

Aries_Split

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May 12, 2008
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I assumed a MGS review, nonetheless, funny. I lost my luster for haze after it was delayed fifty fucking times.
 

MikePhilbin

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Mar 15, 2008
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WAR IS BAD, but not as bad as the pro-war-spandex-usage in this from MGS4TV [http://mikephilbin.blogspot.com/2008/06/mgs4-nano.html] tap that funky foooooot recroooot.
 

Darzok

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Mar 3, 2008
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The music at the start fits with the game.

I think you stoped me buying haze makes me think oh man not another crysis like game that just has you runing around killing poorly armed enemys with body armor as strong as a T-shirt that can stop like 20 shots to the chest.
 

Russian_Assassin

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Apr 24, 2008
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So, another review that warned me not to buy a game... where would I be without reviews XD Man I laughed my ass off when I heard the "I got high" song! I love it! I also discovered that me and Yahtzee share a love for cornetos :p
 

Surggical_Scar

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Feb 13, 2008
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I actually was lucky enough to attend a presentation by the Haze crew and chatted with their resident scriptwriter. The way he pitched it, I really liked the sound of it, but then again, he pushed the drug element a lot more than the war bit, which must be a bit of a bugger when you're touting a FPS.

Nevertheless, a pleasant return to the upper-level wit that had somehow been dropping away as of late, and although I was never going to but Haze anyway, it's good to know I'm not missing out of much.

Now, off to play Mass Effect for all the sexy jubblies.
 

Master Kuja

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May 28, 2008
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I almost expected a review busting the balls of Ninja Gaiden 2's difficulty, but nevertheless, this week's review was very entertaining and as usual, hit the nail on the head.
 

HadesWTF

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Jun 4, 2008
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Excellent job Yahtzee.


As a fellow reviewer who loved MGS4. I can't wait for you to criticize it!
 

OriginalUsername

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May 8, 2008
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Hahaha, i'm glad this game sucked and i hope its sales were terrible. The industry needs to realise the we don't need more generic shooters. Also Fab>Cornetto.
 

saphronic

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May 21, 2008
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"Have one's cake and eat it too" is nonsensical because the saying was originally the opposite: "eat one's cake and have it", i.e. still have your cake after you've eaten it.
 

crabman

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May 19, 2008
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Well thanks to that review, I now want a cornetto.
I'm already hungry enough!

I have to agree with DoctorNick.
$110???
That's £53! (yeah, I needed to convert it to 'real' money)
 

Deionarra

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Feb 6, 2008
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Another top notch review from an entertainment standpoint at least. I can't comment about the validity of the comments about the game it's self as I wasn't stupid enough to have played it. ^^

I think Yahtzee's closing line in this one is my new favourite, my previous being the one from the Perseus Mandate video.
 

PedroSteckecilo

Mexican Fugitive
Feb 7, 2008
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Sadly after the awesome Turok and Halo 3 reviews he's already ripped the guts out of the FPS, hence this review feels kind of like he's desecrating the corpse of the genre and dancing on its grave.
 

Bowstring

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May 30, 2008
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"...If it wasn't on the back of the fucking box."

Haha, loads of games fall into that trap. They reveal key plot points before we've even played the game. Great review as always.
 

Prodigs

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Nov 17, 2007
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Haze was never and will be a remembered game, simply another FPS lost in the dust. I think that should be the goal of every developer of a current gen FPS: How can I make my game stand out, and how do I make it last?