Zero Punctuation: Kane & Lynch 2: Dog Days

[DiscoAtThePanic]

The only honest man in Game Reviewing, well him and Shamus. Its great to have reviewers that will call a turd a turd without worrying that Microsoft or EA or Activision might pull an add if they get off their knees. K&L 1 had horrible player reviews, despite their forcing the pros to praise it, and this one will be the same.

 

[008Zulu_v1legacy]

I laughed so hard at that review. Vintage Yahtzee at his best trashing a game from beginning to end, the best way to experience a Kane & Lynch game.

 

[city cider]

Still vomitting from the amount of Yahtzee cock sucking I read in the first 20 replies alone, but just posting here to say I'm thankful of everything he said in this review, I finally have something to cite when I express displeasure at my friends referring to Kane and Lynch as "gaming's most notorious". Fucking marketing.

 

[daxterx2005]

Yahtzee! what happened to dolphins!?!?!
I demand more dolphins!

 

[Ashsaver]

I wish the guys at other forum I'm also a member of,who are basically praise Kane & Lynch 2,watch this review.

I was like a blacksheep over there being the only person who hate K&N 2 guts.

 

[dragonmoony]

what a load of bull
this game was 999999x better than the previous game (K&L 1)
it was awesome, the characters were awesome and the whole camera recorded effect was awesome
very immersive.

yahtzee just sucks at "grown-up games"

 

[matt87_50]

can't wait for your review of DNF now! honestly, I look forward to it way more than the actual game.

 

[wooty]

I guess this kind of expalins why only 4 days after its release, I saw it in Gamestation with 50% off already. It must be really bad.

 

[GrizzlerBorno]

i love the awkward Duke nukem reference at the end.

 

[Jaranja]

You can tell when Yahtzee is simply being a prat for the sake of Zero Punctuation, and he was clearly legitimately ripping on this game. He's never been so openly mad at a video game as he is in this video.

Maybe, but the game acctually is bad.

I inferred that.

No, you implied that.

Actually, you'd have to really dig into my post to find any implication. I inferred the quality of the game from the actual ZP video, so I felt it was excessive to remind me that the game was in fact bad.

I thought, when you said "I inferred that.", that you meant in your original post, not in relation to the video.

My apologies.

 

[EchetusXe]

Marvellous.

 

[cefm]

"K&L sucks so many d*cks it now breathes spunk instead of air"

That's a memorable line. Will have to steal and use again.

 

[politbureau]

Well well. Another derisive rant against another shitty game using more expletives than a bingo hall has dentures. Shall I swoon now?

However while I heartily applaud your gritty Tristram Shandy-esque mockery, you have earned my ire in one area.

Ardbeg, sir, is not whisky. You know of what I speak. To label it such would be using the perjorative; perhaps you were ostensibly describing it for the drivel-headed viewers, to whom 'whiskey' is something to be drank in 1oz increments while under the effects of loud music and large-breasted women.

But I digress.

Good review though.

Toodle pip!

 

[cefm]

Can someone explain to me what happened with Gamespot and the first one? Were they bribing them for good reviews or something?

Apparently Jeff Gerstmann (a 10-year Gamespot veteran) was fired shortly after giving a highly accurate negative review of the first Kane & Lynch game (6/10 counts as negative, these days, I guess). Internal leaks indicate that the developer of the game (IO Interactive) had paid a large amount to GameSpot to make this one of the site's "sponsored" games. In a disappointing change from the way the site used to work, that now means not only does the game get advertising space, but it also is supposed to get positive reviews. So Jeff goes bye-bye. He still does reviews at Giantbomb.com

Some theorize that this wasn't just an individual firing but more sending a message to the rest of the wage-slaves at GameSpot that there was a new way of doing business.

The funny part is that the GameSpot review for the sequel also got panned for pretty much all the same reasons - and was lucky to get a 6.5.

 

[itf cho]

Well, wow... that certainly wasn't a ringing endorsement. Has he ever disliked a game more? Seriously, if there is a more negative review, give me the link. I'd love to watch it.

As for K&L... initially, I'd be tempted to say, darn... Kinda late to be reviewing this, isn't it? I mean the game has been out for how many weeks now? But since I haven't as yet purchased it, for which I'm quite grateful now, I guess he's done a solid since I have zero chance of ever buying it now. I was initially thinking this might be a decent buy once it goes on sale... But I saw another review about how the graphics were intentionally crap. Guess this one is a must-miss.

 

[pepitko]

Wow, that was quite a beating the game got and deserved, very funny indeed. I can't believe other reviewers marked this 7/10, which is on par with something like Mafia 2.

 

[Jiveturkey124]

Great Episode, my love for Yahtzee's work is on a new level haha.

Seriously though, the game looked horrible im so glad i never played or bought either one.

 

[H3llkn0wz]

Aww, he's just bitter he had to come back from holiday to review bland shotoers.

 

[8bitdragon]

Brilliant! Now lets hope you dont get fired for a bad review :O

 

[dennett316]

what a load of bull
this game was 999999x better than the previous game (K&L 1)
it was awesome, the characters were awesome and the whole camera recorded effect was awesome
very immersive.

yahtzee just sucks at "grown-up games"

You think lots of swearing and terrible characters equal "grown up"?? You're twelve aren't you? Seriously, just look at your own quote above... "_____ is awesome!" That's not an opinion, that's the ranting of an infant. Now if you said '_______ is awesome because ______' then you may have come close to having a point. As it stands, you're a teenager who thinks that swearing and violence equals mature content, which is so laughably stupid I actually kind of pity you if you turn out to not be a teen. Hell I also appreciate some brain dead violent shit, but at no point would I try to claim it as anything other than the daft schlock that it is.
Get a grip and try to have an actual opinion beyond "heh, he said fuck...this is AWESOME!!!". Grown up games.....priceless.