Zero Punctuation: Mailbag Showdown

Jack Spencer Jr

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Dec 15, 2007
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Indigo_Dingo said:
What does that say about the people who are trying to defend him?
That they should lighten up and remember that Yahtzee is a big boy and can defend himself. Not that he really needs to defend himself from the arrogant little twats, anyway. They can complain all they want and he's still getting paid to review games and they're still cunts who smell of low tide.
 

alphaxi

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Apr 29, 2008
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Good review as always.

I'd argue that it wasn't entirely necessary to respond to the fanboys but at the same time this may be one of the lulziest things I've experienced in a while so I'm not complaining.
 

WhiteFangofWhoa

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Jan 11, 2008
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Very funny and mean- just the way it was intended! The spellchecking of the letters reminded me of Strong Bad from H*R's habitual checking and ridiculing, or of his 'crippling ritual' in the Psychonauts review.

Yes, I'll still be buying SSBB when the moment is right due to absurd amount of fun I've had with the first two. But I'll open a snow-shoveling buisness in Hell before seeing fit to insult this guy or any part or relative of his based on his opinion of a game, particularly one so focused on a feature he freely admits never constitutes the main course for him- the multiplayer mode. Heck, he actually said good things about the single player mode, which is a pleasant suprise considering the lacking single player content of Melee.

Yahtzee dissected 4 emails this week- just think of the insane number of illiterate pig scratches that must have prompted this article just to attempt to get them to shut up for a bit (doubtful it will work but one can hope). I haven't heard of such a massive fan backlash over a Nintendo game since the first previews of Zelda: The Wind Waker.
 

scorallo

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May 10, 2008
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speaking as someone who actualy enjoys SSBB, if only because I hate Luigi and enjoy seeing him get the shit beaten out of him, I must say
BRAVO!
SSBB is a stupid game (I still find it fun, but I completly agreed with every point the original criticism made)and I find that Nintendo fans are much to defensive.
I really dont understand, if the console is really as great as they say (again, not saying it isnt fun... just that its flawed) then why do they constantly feel the urge to defend it? If the Wii really is the shining monolith of perfecton that most Nintendo fans tell us we should be making our daily prayrs to, then it should just be able to stand alone like the 360 (more monolith shaped in any case) - proud and benevolent - striking down its foes with its streamline design and mighty hard drive as if it were saying "fuck you!" whilst raping every system up the ass.
But lets face it even the 360 has its flaws as these reviews constantly remind us, and any Nintendo fanboy or girl will be more then happy to agree with me there
I guess I will have to simply pray for a day when consoles learn that they are just no match for the awesome power of the PC...
Obviously a joke because as we all know the console wars are basically a contest of "whatever-floats-your-boat" and im sorry but if you haven't figured that out yet then you must be: stupid, living in your parents basement, or a Nintendo fanboy/girl, or all of the above... in any case you all suck dick.

SPAM AWAY! you will only be proving my point.
 

Sylocat

Sci-Fi & Shakespeare
Nov 13, 2007
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Ever notice how about half the people still keeping this stupid thread going have a post count of exactly 1?
 

Mythbhavd

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May 1, 2008
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Indigo_Dingo said:
SacrificiaLamb said:
What makes Croshaw any less legitimate than the throngs of ass whores who have been squirting out perfect 10 scores across-the-board for GTA 4?
Because they give legitimate reasons as to why GTA IV deserves a perfect 10, while Yahtzee does not.
Did I miss a post? When did Yahtzee review GTA IV? ;o)
 

Demotros

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Apr 17, 2008
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Am I the only one who just watches his reviews because they are fucking hilarious? You went out of your way to go watch a vid about HIS OPINION. What kind of nerve do people have to get twisted up in knots because someone thinks differently than they do?

Wait... I've heard about these people before...
 

ElArabDeMagnifico

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Dec 20, 2007
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Sylocat said:
Ever notice how about half the people still keeping this stupid thread going have a post count of exactly 1?
Just another ZP thread, people creating accounts to say "LOL NICE REVIEW!" - it's just like the first two posts always have banned users, just another "ZP Thread Trademark!"
 

lordbk

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May 10, 2008
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excellent review (as always). :)
thank you very much for making me laugh until i roll on the floor every week.

keep up the great work!
 

Booze Zombie

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Dec 8, 2007
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Legitimacy is subjective, really, and you haven't stated what your think a "legitimate" reason for rating a game is.

"I rated this game poorly because I drank a bottle of vodka with... another bottle of vodka, resulting in my poor review of this game and a painful death." "Wow, what a good review!"

Hell, I could state that Yahtzee's reviews are not "legitimate" because he didn't meet my personal critera for game reviews.

"He wasn't stoned or drunk in any way, shape or form and therefore unable to comprehend the game through a gamer's blurry, caffeine fueled eyes."

But the damndest thing, Dingo... nobody cares about my definition of legitimacy, I'm a blip of text in a sea of text.
Oh, guess that goes for us all. My bad.
Nobody cares about *our* definitions of legitimacy, *we're* just blips of text in a sea of text.
 

wiseass

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Jan 5, 2008
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Indigo_Dingo said:
wiseass said:
Indigo_Dingo said:
SacrificiaLamb said:
What makes Croshaw any less legitimate than the throngs of ass whores who have been squirting out perfect 10 scores across-the-board for GTA 4?
Because they give legitimate reasons as to why GTA IV deserves a perfect 10, while Yahtzee does not.
No, there is no legitimate reason as to why GTA IV is a perfect 10, THOSE reviewers are just spouting out what everyone expects them to or what has already been spouted, those reviewers' scores and opinions were basically copy pasted.
Yahtzee, on the otherhand, happened to list many flaws not heavily mentioned. Just because not every shit-head reviewer spouts out the flaws yahtzee listed, does not make those flaws any less legit.
The fact that the flaws in Brawl were proved to be able to be considered wrong by people on these boards does make them less legitimate.
You know your right

The single player in brawl was FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC\, and hafting to play through it AGAIN at the end was even BETTER. We should be THANKFUL we had to play the entirety of it just to play as sonic

Brawl clearly isnt a button masher, despite the fact that every fighter game in existence is a button masher, brawl is clearly defying the genre, I mean TWO WHOLE ATTACK BUTTONS?!?!?!?!?! ZOMG HOW DOES NINTENDO DO IT!
 

Parallel Pain

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May 7, 2008
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LOL

Remember Yahtzee saying in the review? "If you liked the game, other people's opinion shouldn't get to you, unless of course there's a tiny little doubt in the back of your mind that your purchase wasn't as good as it seems and it won't go away no matter how many times you try to whack it down with weak excuses like this one..."

Really, people (looking at people still defending the game), as someone has pointed out before, don't you think it would be more FUN to go and actually PLAY the game?

Heck I personaly HATE (not exaggerating) all first person shooters and find fighting games mediocre. I prefer to use my brain in tactics and strategy gaming. That doesn't stop me from watching these reviews OR playing the games =)

And eer yeah, if Yahtzee states a reason for his dislike of the game, the reason is legitimate to him. As for unlocking the characters in multiplayer, knowing party games like this (friends all play it), at a party everyone wants to use their favourite character right from the start to beat each other up. Who is going to want to spend half the night unlocking characters at a party, even if with friends? Certainly not my friends. We certainly all expected the poor owner of the game to have them already unlocked when we got there. And we don't really worry about "that guy" because well, we're good friends and laugh at anything, even getting beaten up by "that guy".
 

fisk

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Apr 29, 2008
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sorry for offtopic, but does Yahtzee reply to any thread or posts here? I haven't noticed any posts!
 

snellface

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May 10, 2008
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Awesome man, just purly awesome, you made my day so awesome. I love your ability to slash and mangle, well, everything :)

And for the record, yepp, im one of the white trashes who got both the PS3, Wii and the XBox360, which have been, since the time i looked at it while it was turned on, turned red ring of death all over my ass.
 

Jack Spencer Jr

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Dec 15, 2007
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Indigo_Dingo said:
Jack Spencer Jr said:
Indigo_Dingo said:
What does that say about the people who are trying to defend him?
That they should lighten up and remember that Yahtzee is a big boy and can defend himself.
So shut the fuck up you little ****.
I'm not defending Yahtzee. I'm laughing at you waggling around your little willie.

I'll let you know when you say anything that deserve a response beyond pointing and laughing.