Zero Punctuation: Shadow of the Colossus

[JediDisciple]

Hurray! SotC. This makes me want to replay this game...

 

[Jupsto]

Yahtzee fails at basic genetics.

men have X chromosomes too, surely even 12 year olds know this.

 

[Warforger]

Oh wow, you're no higher than gold, are you? Spam the best unit? Yeah, don't worry about scouting, adapting, positioning, cheesing, harassing, expanding, denying, sniping, hiding, or countering, just mass Stalkers every single game. You're guaranteed to win, right?! Come back when you're Diamond, and I /might/ take you seriously.

Positioning? Ha. Funny. The rest are all aspects of spamming the best unit. Fuck I was good at Warhammer 40k TT and Chess but when I got on DoW all everyone was talking about was what unit was the best to spam.

You have to use tactical thinking, fight for map control and preserve your units in Dawn of war. Same with starcraft but you can afford to lose troops if you did more resources in damage to your opponent. I don't know what games you are playing.

Yah which is like the first or second tier. Let's put it like this, if you lose one squad of Space Marines in DoW, is it that devastating? No you can just build more. You could throw away an army then build another one while the enemy is walking towards your base.

That claim is laughable at best. Especially in the face of games like World In Conflict or Ground Control.

"Is one unit of marines a devastating loss?" It would be if you were playing anyone decent. The sudden loss of 200 requisition+squad reinforcements and heavy weapons upgrades can delay your teching speed more than enough to cost you the game. If you let yourself lose squads and you opponent retreats/dances/outfights you and doesn't lose squads sure you can build another marine squad, but your opponent can also build another squad and have those troops plus the ones you didn't manage to kill. You'd get overwhelmed or out teched. You clearly don't play anyone even half good at that game. Any dawn of war player worth anything will tell you to do your best to maintain map console and to avoid losing squads. You just didn't play beyond the tutorial level. Any RTS is just spamming units if you don't know how to play.

Seeing as how you clearly never played more than one or two matches with another first timer, I don't think you can judge a game you don't know squat about.

This is hilarious. So basically what your telling me is that not only do I suck at RTS's, in order for me to actually use strategy is to play online multiplayer with the hard to find and get into club of elitist pro's. Do you see whats wrong here? Not only have I played with the pro's and seen nothing that special, I've also encountered they're huge douches half the time. So basically in summary I have to play with the "Gold" people in order to experience "strategy", instead of you know playing against the AI and experiencing "strategy" even if that was true, it still doesn't touch the Ground Control campaign. This sounds awfully alot like the "but it gets good 20 hours in!" argument for games, its not a point in its favor.


Again my original point shines here, Yahtzee thinks a game should stand on its SP, at this rate the Starcraft review will probably end up like SSBB and Halo Wars combined.

PS. I've played hundreds of online DoW matches

Yahtzee fails at basic genetics.

men have X chromosomes too, surely even 12 year olds know this.

Extra X chromosome. Women == XX Men == XY

 

[Stone Wera]

Men and women both have X chromosomes. Just thought I'd clear that up.

I thought it went Y,Y= female, X,Y= male.

EDIT: Double quote.

 

[Olivor]

Thanks for the increase in adverts, I hope they're paying you well!

 

[ZeppMan217]

A lion with a jetpack? Damn, I want one.

 

[elitestranger1]

don't knock silent hill 4 its the greatest story of any game in existence, the only game i've played that makes me want to keep playing to find out what happens next.
yes silent hill 2 is good coz its scary but the story is wank.

First off it wasnt originally gonna be Silent Hill, it just ended up with Silent Hill story bits tacked on and is completely out of place in the series (not counting Homecoming and the God-awful PSP and Wii games)
Silent Hill 2 on the other hand was one of the best stories in games though and gave you the drive to carry on...which was NOT the case in 4, which was fucking clown shoes.=P

the reason i say this is coz silent hill 2 was a simple game of hide and seek (mary must be in the hospital...ok maybe not, lets try the park...dam the roads blocked...and so on)

silent hill 4 is a total mystery (why is the door locked? why is there a hole? what is this place? who are these people? why do they keep killing themselves? how do i get out?) also the story of walter in the diaries that unfolds is one of the main points that made me keep playing.

 

[Decabo]

...

 

[Decabo]

Men and women both have X chromosomes. Just thought I'd clear that up.

I thought it went Y,Y= female, X,Y= male.

EDIT: Double quote.

O_O

...No, it's XX for female, and XY for male.

 

[redarmyagent]

Yahtzee fails at basic genetics.

men have X chromosomes too, surely even 12 year olds know this.

You really, really overestimate people's general knowledge.

Also, it was probably a joke. Yahtzee is known to make those from time to time.

 

[water_cat1]

I know it is futile trying to convince yahtzee to review starcraft 2, it really is a good game. I am sure he mentioned that he reviews games based on their single player, and starcraft 2 has a great campaign, truly draws you in and certain decisions will affect how the rest of your missions progress. I also love starcraft 2 and some FPS's, who says you can't love both?

Anyways, nice review, always part of my weekly entertainment.

 

[Andrei Bubu]

Don't bother, he's not gonna like it, he doesn't know who Raynor is, he's not gonna care what happened to Kerrigan, it's not even the story of the century. The only reason I even give a damn about SC2 is because I've been playing BroodWar for the last 13 years.

 

[SendMeNoodz84]

For once, me and Yahtzee share a common opinion. This game really is THAT good.

 

[Skorpyo]

love this game, one of my favs!

*edit*

great review as well... starcraft 2 can suck it

SC2 doesn't need a review. It was a game for the fanboys and Koreans.

Now I must play SotC. Where'd I put that old VCR... I mean, PS2....

 

[Eldarion]

Oh wow, you're no higher than gold, are you? Spam the best unit? Yeah, don't worry about scouting, adapting, positioning, cheesing, harassing, expanding, denying, sniping, hiding, or countering, just mass Stalkers every single game. You're guaranteed to win, right?! Come back when you're Diamond, and I /might/ take you seriously.

Positioning? Ha. Funny. The rest are all aspects of spamming the best unit. Fuck I was good at Warhammer 40k TT and Chess but when I got on DoW all everyone was talking about was what unit was the best to spam.

You have to use tactical thinking, fight for map control and preserve your units in Dawn of war. Same with starcraft but you can afford to lose troops if you did more resources in damage to your opponent. I don't know what games you are playing.

Yah which is like the first or second tier. Let's put it like this, if you lose one squad of Space Marines in DoW, is it that devastating? No you can just build more. You could throw away an army then build another one while the enemy is walking towards your base.

That claim is laughable at best. Especially in the face of games like World In Conflict or Ground Control.

"Is one unit of marines a devastating loss?" It would be if you were playing anyone decent. The sudden loss of 200 requisition+squad reinforcements and heavy weapons upgrades can delay your teching speed more than enough to cost you the game. If you let yourself lose squads and you opponent retreats/dances/outfights you and doesn't lose squads sure you can build another marine squad, but your opponent can also build another squad and have those troops plus the ones you didn't manage to kill. You'd get overwhelmed or out teched. You clearly don't play anyone even half good at that game. Any dawn of war player worth anything will tell you to do your best to maintain map console and to avoid losing squads. You just didn't play beyond the tutorial level. Any RTS is just spamming units if you don't know how to play.

Seeing as how you clearly never played more than one or two matches with another first timer, I don't think you can judge a game you don't know squat about.

This is hilarious. So basically what your telling me is that not only do I suck at RTS's, in order for me to actually use strategy is to play online multiplayer with the hard to find and get into club of elitist pro's. Do you see whats wrong here? Not only have I played with the pro's and seen nothing that special, I've also encountered they're huge douches half the time. So basically in summary I have to play with the "Gold" people in order to experience "strategy", instead of you know playing against the AI and experiencing "strategy" even if that was true, it still doesn't touch the Ground Control campaign. This sounds awfully alot like the "but it gets good 20 hours in!" argument for games, its not a point in its favor.


Again my original point shines here, Yahtzee thinks a game should stand on its SP, at this rate the Starcraft review will probably end up like SSBB and Halo Wars combined.

PS. I've played hundreds of online DoW matches

Yes I am saying you suck at dawn of war. All the things I mentioned aren't thing that only gold level players grasp, its the basics that everyone knows. Stuff that noob guides cover. If you can't grasp the basic stuff then you must not be very good at this game.

PS. I've played hundreds of online DoW matches

That doesn't matter if you play badly with other people who don't know how to play.

I don't even know why I am talking to you to be honest. Your "all rts games are crap except this one." attitude is classic fanboy behavior. So is just ignoring basic strategy in a game just because you can't seem to use any. Obviously you aren't here to discuss anything, but rather to troll against any game that isn't Ground control.

 

[Warforger]

Yes I am saying you suck at dawn of war. All the things I mentioned aren't thing that only gold level players grasp, its the basics that everyone knows. Stuff that noob guides cover. If you can't grasp the basic stuff then you must not be very good at this game.

Which weren't actual strategy. The only actual strategy is between T1 and T2 after you've establish economy it quickly fades away, and with the games focusing on getting to T3 the strategy is quickly extracted. Again most of the posters have been telling me that I have the play gold level to experience strategy, which again is NOT a point in its favor.

PS. I've played hundreds of online DoW matches

That doesn't matter if you play badly with other people who don't know how to play.

I don't even know why I am talking to you to be honest. Your "all rts games are crap except this one." attitude is classic fanboy behavior. So is just ignoring basic strategy in a game just because you can't seem to use any. Obviously you aren't here to discuss anything, but rather to troll against any game that isn't Ground control.

I avoided comp stomps and I've played a multitude of players ranging from noobs to pro's. No I am not, my point is that these RTS's are more like Real Time Spammers then Real Time Strategy.

I'm not a troll in the basis that trolls just post to piss people off, some people are pissed off when they see people they don't agree with.

 

[redarmyagent]

words words words

words words words

Gee guyz arguing with total strangers about which one of you is better at a video game when neither of you have ever played eachother is super cool.

Easy solution to your problem: PLAY EACHOTHER. I don't care if its just one match, 2 out of 3, or whatever. But it'll settle this argument a lot more certainly than "LOL NO U SUK MOAR"

 

[Pandora92]

Man I REALLY need to hurry up buy an old PS2 controller, I have so many games left over for that console that I've wanted to play for so long now, but none of my old controllers work and I always put off buying a new one.

 

[moose_man]

I could only beat the first Colossi, my horse backed me into a corner for the second one and I couldn't shoot.

 

[mik1]

I hate it when people hate something so popular that they began to start talking about it like their opening up an argument. I don't care if you don't like starcraft2. And yes it is very satisfying to destroy your enemy.

And if you remotely like rts's get starcraft2 because it is the best one ever. And rts's never get boring because in any other type of game you can beat it a million times with the same experience. Every rts match is different. So you can play your favorite game today and you can play your multilayer fps's using the exact same strategy over and over but sc2 wont die for a very long time.