Zero Punctuation: Shadow of the Colossus

NKnight

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Jul 31, 2010
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It's even weird see Yahtzee liking a game, even Shadow of Colossus. It's good because usually i watch just for the laughs, as i know you will just complain about the game like a annoying little girl no matter how good it is! YOU SHOULD REVIEW MORE GAMES THAT YOU LIKE, and put a golden star next to them so we know wich are THE CHOSEN ONES.
 

nntb

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Aug 13, 2010
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i for one am personally glad ZP doesn't review star craft 2. not that anyone here cares i will divulge my views anyways so you might as well skip this post now. besides Yahtzee is probably being but-hurt about not getting large bags of money from blizzard to do a review of Star Craft 2.

to appreciate Star Craft 2 you dont have to know the history of SC1 but it doesnt hurt. SC1 started as a crappy RTS that was sooo bad they switched all there demo screens at E3 when they announced it from SC1 to Diablo. it was a joke but here is what makes it insane.

1st it was completely rewritten in 2 months.
2nd it was online.
3rd. where other studios spent time creating new games and new campaigns and new stores. after the first expansion brood war came out blizzard started making tweaks to the game and polished it for 11 YEARS why is star craft 1 the national sport of Korea? because it is one of the most well balanced multi player games in existence.

ok lets say you didn't get into all that stuff me personally i just got on the beta because a friend did(not really knowing what i was getting into) and i must admit it was so fun i ended up buying the game... to my surprise it wasn't all multilayer. there was this single player mode that just sucked me in. i never beat star craft 1 so i dont get all nostalgic when someone shows up and i am supposed to know who they are. but choices you make (that are forced on you in the sort of "oh snap bad aliens are infecting our colony of scientists but y race wants to cleanse the planet with fire you have to click on who to side with kind of thing... its unnerving because sometimes i end up going with the girl thats more attractive... leading to the violent death of the other person... i wish there was a 3rd option like middle ground... but then after that the scenery on your main ship changes according to your choices reminding you of what you made and the story changes accordingly...) anyways back on topic... sc2. its a good game. if your computer can run it. if it cant i suggest you try out SC1 and patch it and play though the campaign. its a really dated game and i never played the campaign but if its anything like 2. the campaign should be jaw dropping suck you in and never let you leave... now alt tabbing back to SC2 >.< it owns my soul now.

back in the day i liked dune 2 and c&c was OK, i moved on to age of empires 2... but decided i hate RTS games... that being said i still throughly enjoy SC2 and it got me back into RTS if only for that game.
 

Jupsto

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Feb 8, 2008
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Yahtzee fails at basic genetics.

men have X chromosomes too, surely even 12 year olds know this.
 

Warforger

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Apr 24, 2010
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Eldarion said:
Warforger said:
TheBaron87 said:
Oh wow, you're no higher than gold, are you? Spam the best unit? Yeah, don't worry about scouting, adapting, positioning, cheesing, harassing, expanding, denying, sniping, hiding, or countering, just mass Stalkers every single game. You're guaranteed to win, right?! Come back when you're Diamond, and I /might/ take you seriously.
Positioning? Ha. Funny. The rest are all aspects of spamming the best unit. Fuck I was good at Warhammer 40k TT and Chess but when I got on DoW all everyone was talking about was what unit was the best to spam.

Eldarion said:
You have to use tactical thinking, fight for map control and preserve your units in Dawn of war. Same with starcraft but you can afford to lose troops if you did more resources in damage to your opponent. I don't know what games you are playing.
Yah which is like the first or second tier. Let's put it like this, if you lose one squad of Space Marines in DoW, is it that devastating? No you can just build more. You could throw away an army then build another one while the enemy is walking towards your base.

That claim is laughable at best. Especially in the face of games like World In Conflict or Ground Control.


"Is one unit of marines a devastating loss?" It would be if you were playing anyone decent. The sudden loss of 200 requisition+squad reinforcements and heavy weapons upgrades can delay your teching speed more than enough to cost you the game. If you let yourself lose squads and you opponent retreats/dances/outfights you and doesn't lose squads sure you can build another marine squad, but your opponent can also build another squad and have those troops plus the ones you didn't manage to kill. You'd get overwhelmed or out teched. You clearly don't play anyone even half good at that game. Any dawn of war player worth anything will tell you to do your best to maintain map console and to avoid losing squads. You just didn't play beyond the tutorial level. Any RTS is just spamming units if you don't know how to play.

Seeing as how you clearly never played more than one or two matches with another first timer, I don't think you can judge a game you don't know squat about.
This is hilarious. So basically what your telling me is that not only do I suck at RTS's, in order for me to actually use strategy is to play online multiplayer with the hard to find and get into club of elitist pro's. Do you see whats wrong here? Not only have I played with the pro's and seen nothing that special, I've also encountered they're huge douches half the time. So basically in summary I have to play with the "Gold" people in order to experience "strategy", instead of you know playing against the AI and experiencing "strategy" even if that was true, it still doesn't touch the Ground Control campaign. This sounds awfully alot like the "but it gets good 20 hours in!" argument for games, its not a point in its favor.


Again my original point shines here, Yahtzee thinks a game should stand on its SP, at this rate the Starcraft review will probably end up like SSBB and Halo Wars combined.

PS. I've played hundreds of online DoW matches

Banok said:
Yahtzee fails at basic genetics.

men have X chromosomes too, surely even 12 year olds know this.
Extra X chromosome. Women == XX Men == XY
 

elitestranger1

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Nov 20, 2009
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CTU_Loscombe said:
elitestranger1 said:
don't knock silent hill 4 its the greatest story of any game in existence, the only game i've played that makes me want to keep playing to find out what happens next.
yes silent hill 2 is good coz its scary but the story is wank.
First off it wasnt originally gonna be Silent Hill, it just ended up with Silent Hill story bits tacked on and is completely out of place in the series (not counting Homecoming and the God-awful PSP and Wii games)
Silent Hill 2 on the other hand was one of the best stories in games though and gave you the drive to carry on...which was NOT the case in 4, which was fucking clown shoes.=P
the reason i say this is coz silent hill 2 was a simple game of hide and seek (mary must be in the hospital...ok maybe not, lets try the park...dam the roads blocked...and so on)

silent hill 4 is a total mystery (why is the door locked? why is there a hole? what is this place? who are these people? why do they keep killing themselves? how do i get out?) also the story of walter in the diaries that unfolds is one of the main points that made me keep playing.
 

redarmyagent

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Feb 5, 2010
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Banok said:
Yahtzee fails at basic genetics.

men have X chromosomes too, surely even 12 year olds know this.
You really, really overestimate people's general knowledge.

Also, it was probably a joke. Yahtzee is known to make those from time to time.
 

water_cat1

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Mar 30, 2010
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I know it is futile trying to convince yahtzee to review starcraft 2, it really is a good game. I am sure he mentioned that he reviews games based on their single player, and starcraft 2 has a great campaign, truly draws you in and certain decisions will affect how the rest of your missions progress. I also love starcraft 2 and some FPS's, who says you can't love both?

Anyways, nice review, always part of my weekly entertainment.
 

Andrei Bubu

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Feb 15, 2010
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Don't bother, he's not gonna like it, he doesn't know who Raynor is, he's not gonna care what happened to Kerrigan, it's not even the story of the century. The only reason I even give a damn about SC2 is because I've been playing BroodWar for the last 13 years.
 

Skorpyo

Average Person Extraordinaire!
May 2, 2010
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Blablachn said:
love this game, one of my favs!

*edit*

great review as well... starcraft 2 can suck it
SC2 doesn't need a review. It was a game for the fanboys and Koreans.

Now I must play SotC. Where'd I put that old VCR... I mean, PS2....
 

Eldarion

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Sep 30, 2009
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Warforger said:
Eldarion said:
Warforger said:
TheBaron87 said:
Oh wow, you're no higher than gold, are you? Spam the best unit? Yeah, don't worry about scouting, adapting, positioning, cheesing, harassing, expanding, denying, sniping, hiding, or countering, just mass Stalkers every single game. You're guaranteed to win, right?! Come back when you're Diamond, and I /might/ take you seriously.
Positioning? Ha. Funny. The rest are all aspects of spamming the best unit. Fuck I was good at Warhammer 40k TT and Chess but when I got on DoW all everyone was talking about was what unit was the best to spam.

Eldarion said:
You have to use tactical thinking, fight for map control and preserve your units in Dawn of war. Same with starcraft but you can afford to lose troops if you did more resources in damage to your opponent. I don't know what games you are playing.
Yah which is like the first or second tier. Let's put it like this, if you lose one squad of Space Marines in DoW, is it that devastating? No you can just build more. You could throw away an army then build another one while the enemy is walking towards your base.

That claim is laughable at best. Especially in the face of games like World In Conflict or Ground Control.


"Is one unit of marines a devastating loss?" It would be if you were playing anyone decent. The sudden loss of 200 requisition+squad reinforcements and heavy weapons upgrades can delay your teching speed more than enough to cost you the game. If you let yourself lose squads and you opponent retreats/dances/outfights you and doesn't lose squads sure you can build another marine squad, but your opponent can also build another squad and have those troops plus the ones you didn't manage to kill. You'd get overwhelmed or out teched. You clearly don't play anyone even half good at that game. Any dawn of war player worth anything will tell you to do your best to maintain map console and to avoid losing squads. You just didn't play beyond the tutorial level. Any RTS is just spamming units if you don't know how to play.

Seeing as how you clearly never played more than one or two matches with another first timer, I don't think you can judge a game you don't know squat about.
This is hilarious. So basically what your telling me is that not only do I suck at RTS's, in order for me to actually use strategy is to play online multiplayer with the hard to find and get into club of elitist pro's. Do you see whats wrong here? Not only have I played with the pro's and seen nothing that special, I've also encountered they're huge douches half the time. So basically in summary I have to play with the "Gold" people in order to experience "strategy", instead of you know playing against the AI and experiencing "strategy" even if that was true, it still doesn't touch the Ground Control campaign. This sounds awfully alot like the "but it gets good 20 hours in!" argument for games, its not a point in its favor.


Again my original point shines here, Yahtzee thinks a game should stand on its SP, at this rate the Starcraft review will probably end up like SSBB and Halo Wars combined.

PS. I've played hundreds of online DoW matches
Yes I am saying you suck at dawn of war. All the things I mentioned aren't thing that only gold level players grasp, its the basics that everyone knows. Stuff that noob guides cover. If you can't grasp the basic stuff then you must not be very good at this game.


PS. I've played hundreds of online DoW matches
That doesn't matter if you play badly with other people who don't know how to play.

I don't even know why I am talking to you to be honest. Your "all rts games are crap except this one." attitude is classic fanboy behavior. So is just ignoring basic strategy in a game just because you can't seem to use any. Obviously you aren't here to discuss anything, but rather to troll against any game that isn't Ground control.