Zero Punctuation: Splinter Cell: Conviction

[Insideout Ink Demon]

valid points made, but i enjoyed the game anyway

 

[Jonsbax]

At first I thought that the gameplay sounded very similiar to how I felt about MGS4, my number 1 dissapointment in games, but then it got even worse. I wonder if Yahtzee was just so fed up with the cut-scenes in MGS4 that the gameplay seemed halfway decent, or is Conviction really that bad?

 

[Venatio]

Totally buying the book!

 

[Plurralbles]

not buying. either the game nor the shamelessly plugged book.

I think there are different brands of stealth. And spliter cell's brand is for as much market appeal as one can get. Guns = money.

 

[mip0]

O_O
Right! The Novel! Buy, gtg!

Shit! Gotta get a credit card first.

Shit! Gotta change bank first, here we go.

 

[Jaebird]

"As fiddly as a fiddler crap fiddling with it's tax returns."

I want that on a T-shirt. You want my money. It's win-win.

Make it happen!

 

[Hapetiitti]

WOW, I'll bet you're the same height as a heckuva lot of other people as well!!!! :O

5 ft 8" is actually pretty disgustingly short

I think that's quite far from short. Maybe below average (if you're a guy), but still quite normal-middle height. Being just over 6' I find myself at just the right height, I can consider myself tall without attracting attention or suffering from it. I'm guessing you're quite young.

 

[Marter]

I think this was one of the more hilarious videos in a while.

 

[Lowbreed]

I didn't even realise that there was a new splinter cell, they're like Guitar hero's now...

You've got to be kidding - this is the first one in 3 years.

Holy cow you're right!
That's how little of a shit I give about those games...

Regardless I take the comparison bit back, well pointed out.

 

[drkchmst]

wow not a high view of America eh?

 

[mexicola]

Ha,ha, this sounds fucking hilarious. Now I'm sure the game isn't a complete pile of shit like Yahtzee makes it appear but it sounds fun hating it. I can't form my opinion until I've played it (which I might soon...perhaps) so I'll just enjoy the review.

 

[Ishadus]

Hey...I live in Montreal!

Them's fightin' words! You British/Australian....kangaroo...who likes...crumpets....or something...

...Shut up!

 

[Masso]

Thank you! Finally, someone can explain it right~

It's the same shit with the last games. Not only does the AI suck, but so does the general gameplay, i.e jumping, running, giving melees. I just can't see who the hell would like Splinter Cell games at all.

 

[Oktanas]

Great review

 

[Dok Zombie]

I liked the fiddler crab joke, it was very Blackadder.

As for Splinter Cell, I downloaded the demo, got into the warehouse, got bored and deleted it. Like he says, the game plays itself for you.

 

[SirDerick]

I live in Montreal and I agree with Yahtzee that people here are fucking retards.

They're people here who say "Fuck the French et Vive le Quebec Libre!" while ignoring the fact that "Vive le Quebec Libre" is a quote from a Frenchman.

 

[Zing]

Sad to agree to everything in this review, Ubisoft fucking suck, 4 years for this shit, and you need a constant internet connection to play it.

I'm only keeping it because EB games gave me a free copy of Chaos Theory/Pandora Tommorow because I pre-ordered it.