Zero Punctuation: Transformers: War for Cybertron

FallenMessiah88

So fucking thrilled to be here!
Jan 8, 2010
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Meh i enjoyed playing with transformers toys when i was a kid, but i never really cared that much for them. Especially not after those stupid Michael Bay movies. I think its safe to say im gonna pass on this one.
 

DaBozz

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May 27, 2009
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wooty said:
You know, as a Transformer fan, even I though this was hilarious. Good job this week.

Oh, btw, Primes death WAS this generations Othello, I'm now off to cry into my duvet covers.
Imma cling to this post since its the only light I have in this dark time.

I'm in a very tough place now Yathzee...I am probably one of the biggest TF fans out there, and I also love you...so im going to spam this thread with how much I hate you for dissing transformers....ugh can't do it, okay okay everything you said was 100% correct as always.
however...im going to cling to the hope that this game is made for the fans...and from a fans point of view the game is great.
 

Lunar Templar

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Sep 20, 2009
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Sylocat said:
I took one look at the title and thought, "Oh, this is going to be gruesome."

I was right.
dito,
helps reduce the sting, of the unfavorable review of a game i beat a month ago, when i can see it coming a mile away

to Yahtzee (assuming you read this at all) the transformations while, yes an over gloried sprint button, still kicked as, turning into a TANK, and clearing a room with the canon was awesome.

some criticisms are valid, but then, it was really made for transformer fans, (not the bayformer fans thank GOD) by transformer fans, so you should know weather or not its your deal by JUST the title
 

Dracosage

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Feb 23, 2010
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But Jason Statham didn't do any stunt driving in Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels or Snatch D:
 

TheHitcher

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Sep 9, 2009
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I'm quite a fan of Transformers, and I loved this game.

Yet, I was scared of watching this video. Simply because I knew Yahtzee would slate this game, and I'd laugh because he'd be fucking right about it.

It's no surprise that my fear was correct. You've done it again, Yahtzee, you charismatic stallion!
 

LeighAlura

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Aug 2, 2010
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As a kid, I never liked Transformers. The thought of my dad's car transforming into a giant, building-crushing monster from hell terrified me to the point of tears as it was, why would I want to immerse myself in an entire franchise of just that kind of thing?

So I honestly probably didn't need to watch the movies or buy the video game(s?) to put a stopper in that bottle of premeditated decisions.

That I took the time to watch a video based around what is basically sheer destructive violence in the form of a critical review doesn't say anything about these decisions of mine, other than I like cheap laughs every now and again.

But I will say this in the franchise's defense: At least when I saw the movies, they were worth watching. And I don't mean that in a "cinematic graphics" or whatever the hell CG stands for kind of way, nor do I intend to base it off the soundtrack (bleeding out my ears to Linkin Park blasted at, what, 100 decibals is not a good way to end an afternoon... and I LIKE Linkin Park), I mean it was made with enough attention to the fact that not many people give a rat's ass about sappy backstories and go to see an action movie just for the action, and maybe sex if that's included in the previews, so at least Spielberg and Bay did that much right.

At this point, I think I'm just spouting incoherent babbling, so I'm just going to go back to my silent stalker self for a bit.
 

Linkassassin360

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Dec 28, 2009
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Eh, the only reason I was really intrested in this game was because I demolished people in multiplayer (no pun intended). Its a shame the campaign is lackluster, but its a game for fans, and if your a fan, your gonna get it reguardless and deny any fault. Hrm... now what web genius said that? XD
 

Shamanic Rhythm

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Dec 6, 2009
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Captain Planet was waaaaaay cooler than Transformers.

I absolutely died laughing at 'Das Fatcow'. Some of your best work yet.
 

GrimCW

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Dec 17, 2009
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lol loved the game tbh as a TF fan and the other pickings suck, but agree on the rest :p

tbh it doesn't fill the proper nostalgia factors either since its another "reimagining" of things.

as for anything specific, the review was more about transformers than the game, and there IS more to the story (the war, Cybertron, the transforming/disguise thing, and megatrons butt hurt attitude), but without being some TF archivist of some sort most of us will never know the whole story i suppose.

to me they'll always just be the best advertised toyline of my childhood and i love'em for it :)
 

xscoot

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Sep 8, 2009
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I'm a huge transformers fan, and I agree.

To put this into Yahztee terms: The original show was Silent Hill 1, 2 and 3. War for Cybertron was Silent Hill 5. Actually that's not fair; Shia Labeouf's movies were Silent Hill 5 bad, at least. War for Cybertron is worse. I don't know, maybe it's more like the cell phone games?

The point is that NO ONE, liked War for Cybertron. If anything it is due to nostalgia that we hate it; it has more to do with the crappy movies than the original series.

By the way, you should pull an AVGN. Less videos per month, but each one is of higher quality. Sorry to say, but you've been in a bit of a decline recently.
 

EvilYoshi

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Aug 9, 2010
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Ok, somebody needs to tell me who is that guy Yahtzee keeps showing pictures of in nearly every video. I'm talking about the disembodied face of some pasty faced man that looks seriously bored. Is that a picture of pre-facial hair Yahtzee or is this person unrelated. Anybody know what I'm talking about.
 

jimClassic

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Jun 4, 2008
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It was a funny 'review' Yahtzee. However much like your Smash Bros video, you just didn't really know what you were talking about. So I just have to let something like that slide.

And I love the game. It's fun. :p

Oh and btw since I do not want to disappoint, I will nerd out; Omega Supreme is supposed to sounds like that. He always has. He's supposed to be cold and emotionless.
 

Blue Musician

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Mar 23, 2010
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I didn't like Transformers, but I didn't hat eit either to flame everyone who liked it. I just found it decent. But this review noted basically all the points I have for the movies and games, specially this one.

Oh, and I shall prepare a bloodbath if I need to entertain myself while you are out BTW.
 

Formica Archonis

Anonymous Source
Nov 13, 2009
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EvilYoshi said:
Ok, somebody needs to tell me who is that guy Yahtzee keeps showing pictures of in nearly every video. I'm talking about the disembodied face of some pasty faced man that looks seriously bored. Is that a picture of pre-facial hair Yahtzee or is this person unrelated. Anybody know what I'm talking about.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/pictures/image/0,8543,-11404347243,00.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas_Ruff
 

Blobpie

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May 20, 2009
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You know... any shooter that relies heavily on online multiplayer will get a bad review from Yahtzee.
 

Odoylerules360

We're all just folk now...
Aug 29, 2008
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Hey!
Snatch and Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels.

Jason Statham didn't fight or stunt drive in either of them.