Zero Punctuation: Transformers: War for Cybertron

[Eversor]

Sorry Yahtzee, you really don't get it, but that's fine. Different strokes to different folks. I greatly enjoyed the game.


It is rather ironic how old cartoons that were made to sell toys actually had decent plot, y'know, bad guys fucking shit up, good guys kicking their ass. It's not something cartoons these days can be proud of, being a screeching clusterfuck of slapstick comedy. I'll take 80's animated toy commercials all day every day over what qualifies as a "cartoon" these days, at least they had some soul in them. Even all that soul just wanted us to buy toys, at least it was honest and clear.

 

[Neino Ranatos]

I actually liked the game but I did find this review hilarious.

I personally think the game's strong point was that atleast it wasn't another damn "Modern Warfare" ripoff. True there were robot soldiers and little tid bits, but it wasn't in Iraq...

Way to review, Yahtzee. Made my day.

 

[KreacherOfbloodandRank]

yes, I have never liked Shia one bit. He always essentially plays the same character in all his movies: Panicked normal guy. The Panicked normal guy is always panicked about some larger than life scenario and is always stuttering and fast talking as he describes it. What a tool.

... so when are you going to review Starcraft 2 yahtzee?

 

[EBHughsThe1st]

While he had some good points, I respectfully disagree.

It was Yahtzee's brutal, joke-layden "critique" that I expected. Even so, low blow, man. Why dis an entire franchise and it's fans off of one game? That's like never going to a strip club again because the strippers tits were too small.

 

[Macheteswordgun]

My only experience with transformers as a child was one toy that could transform between a robot and a dinosaur. Go figure that one out.

Also the process of making it transform was incredibly obnoxious and took at least 5 minutes which sucks when you're trying to play robot dinosaur vs spiderman.

Beast Wars was great. I had the Praying Mantis and the Rhino those at least were not too complicated.
My GI Joes always rode them into battle against my horde of Z-Bots. Such hopeless battles *tear* many a Joe was lost to those wars. (lighter fluid)

OT; Great as always.
Keep doing what you are doing.

I had the tiger bat and the t rex the tiger and bat were hard as fuck and megatrons t rex self didnt fit inside his chest cavity to well

 

[rddj623]

I agree it was underwhelming and repetitive. The boss fights were combination's of run and gun, and hide and gun, with no unique or interesting ways of destroying them. I'm glad I got to play it at a buddies place. Let him have to actually pay for that dang thing, while I can have the 20 minutes of fun that it lent me. He does like the multiplayer though, so perhaps that has something of a redeeming quality.

 

[Nomanslander]

Hah! I knew it, Yahtzee is secretly a Gobots fanboy and jealous it's never gotten the attention Transformers has!

For shame, Yahtzee, for shame!


=P

 

[DRSH1989]

Always disliked Transformers.

 

[viranimus]

Well. I honestly cannot argue most of his points in this. The game is extremely repetitive and most of the enemies you fight are very generic. The multiplayer was .. amusing for a day or two but got old quick.

Nostalgia might play a role in the desire to see this game come to light. However the game isnt entirely bad. The story from a lore standpoint is fairly solid.

One thing I would have to argue is that nostalgia is and isnt the only positive thing about it. For those who have been wanting a transformers game basically since 1980s, even as astoundingly average the game is on most its levels its still leaps and bounds better than any other transformers game that has yet to exist and in a sense, it offers a glimmer of hope that if the developers who did WFC can clean up a few technical issues and problems have the potential to make a sequel of this be a truly good game, which is more hope than the series has had in game form in an extremely long time.

 

[Prof. Monkeypox]

Oh, I thought his vacation was this week. This was a pleasant surprise, especially since it was so funny. But, War For Cybertron? I wondered what he could review, but still, War For Cybertron?

 

[awsome117]

Funny review, still loved the game though. And I loved the Transformers universe (I have a few books of them around here somewhere) and loved the toys (have A LOT of those around here )

Don't judge me!

 

[WIUtomato]

Thank you Yahtzee. Okay, I'll be the first to admit, as a wee lad, I love the Transformers. I had several toys, lunch boxes, bed sheets, etc. That being said, of all that lot, I have precisely fuck-all left. Yard sales and younger cousins spirited all that away from me, and, as much as I may think of myself as a hopeless man-child (or, more accurately, as much as my wife may think of me as a hopeless man-child...) I've never really regretted their passing. The one time I tried to return to those halcyon days, when the first transformers movie came out, was quickly snuffed by said same piece of garbage...

 

[ZeroAE]

Wait , isnt Yahtzee on vacations. I came to the Escapist without hope for anything and there it was ZP!
Thanks Yahtzee for putting us above your vacations!

 

[RubyT]

A bit lazy, Yahtzee, aren't we? You could've done this whole review without ever playing the game.

I forgive you because it was awesome though.

 

[Andronicus]

Not his best work, but still entertaining. Don't think I'll bother with Transformers:WFC. Anyways, have a good holiday! I wonder if he's going international or not...

 

[Deacon Cole]

I'm a Transformers fan from way back and I can say now without any problem that Transformers is shit. It was shit back then and it's still shit now. It has absolutely no reason to exist.

So, a bad game was made of it. What a surprise. You can't spin a turd into gold, mate.

 

[Tony2077]

this maybe nostalgia talking but i liked the animated transformer movie. i also liked the one animated series that was on ytv for awhile when i have no clue anymore and which one I'd have to look up but it had hotshot in it. to be honest i still like transformers but not the toys or games but some of the series and movie

 

[gamepopper101]

Eh, I rarely cared for Transformers anyway. I think Optimus Prime's death was over blown and silly to be taken seriously.

 

[Pegghead]

The moment I saw Pavarotti I guffawed rather loudly.

I never liked transformers either, I was raised on things like "Round the twist" and "The trap door" so thankfully I've never fallen into the nostalgia trap. And I watched the original animated transformers film and didn't bat an eyelash when Optimus carked it.