Zero Punctuation: XBLA Double Bill

[Vromnir]

I had high hopes for today that it would be a good review, filled with the things that made most of Yahtzee's first revies great. Those hopes were beat up, tossed around the room, and shot with a cannon.

It seems like he is running out of ideas for his reviews, which seems impossible becouse there are more bad games coming out every week then there are good games coming out in a month. Why did he do retro games, when he often says that his favorite games are retro? I'm sure yahtzee could do an excelent review about the force unleashed, if only to play around with pictures about the force grip, or to gripe about how both of the endings killed the game.

If yahtzee was really bored, he could always smash up some random JRPG and it would be highly enjoyable. Maybe im just used to the quality of the old reviews(i watch my favorites every week, so no nostalga) and should take a break for a while.......

 

[BobisOnlyBob]

Having read the comments resulting from this video, I feel dumber.

Was everyone oblivious to his point about RELATIVITY? ROSE-TINTED glasses? He likes Twilight Princess and Mario Sunshine because they WERE THE FIRST 3D GAMES IN THOSE SERIES HE PLAYED.

He then goes on to declare "ALSO HITLER WAS RIGHT" because Hitler was the FIRST CONQUERING FACIST he knew presumably, therefore IT MUST BE RIGHT, are you understanding the hypocrisy of loving your past so tightly now? He's being deliberately hypocritical to make a point, and people are STILL jumping down his throat, even with his two-seconds-later disclaimer. The point is that YOU LOVE YOUR PAST and therefore like things you've liked before. So companies make games that cash in on this.

Hell, I still love FFVII, and I know deep down than graphically it's poor, the villian is bland, the main character's a mess and sorting him out is more effort than it's worth, and most of the support cast are one-shtick stereotypes tucked into their own nice backstory that's usually mutually exclusive to everyone else. Yet it's still MY FAVOURITE and if they remade it flawlessly, preserving everything I loved from the first with shiny new graphics and the same old materia system minus the glitches, I would pay full price for it, because my perspective is skewed and I know it and enjoy it.

Also there's a ton of things about 2D/3D playspaces and 2D/3D graphics. Castle Crashers has 2D graphics and a 3D playspace (up into background/down into foreground, left/right, and jumping up/down, 3 axis, 3D). This results in the 2-pixel miss-wiggle nonsense that should've stopped with Golden Axe. Bionic Commando has 3D graphics and 2D gameplay (left/right, grapple up/down). What's the point of the wasteful 3D on bland 2D gameplay that has barely been refined? Giving nostalgia a fresh coat of paint. That's it. There's no other benefit except maybe to appease people who detest anything that looks old, in which case they'll probably hate it once they start playing it anyway.

Yahtzee has never been wrong - you just have to be on the same level of insane, ultra-self-aware, reflexive mentality as him to see why. Everything is wonderful and shiny, everything is made of shit. But I see very little wonderful and shiny in the forum posts above me, and now look what you've made me done. I've written a horrible, bitter little rant and now I'm one of you gibbering idiots claiming to understand what's going through Yahtzee's head. Fuck it. I have no clue, I just think he's got a point and here's my understanding of it. In his own words, if you don't like it, fuck off.

Cocks.

 

[Grampy_bone]

I agree that games only get better as time goes on and that we tend to think more fondly on our early gaming experiences regardless of their overall quality.

But coming from Yahtzee this is insanely hypocritical. Isn't he the one whining every week about how games get worse and worse and how everything new is shit and how great older games like Psychonauts and Prince of Persia are?

 

[Nazulu]

Great review Yahtzee but Hour Glass better than Ocarina of Time is bad english ...BAD YAHTZEE!

Also what is wrong with classic games, they were simple but the main thing is they were alot of fun. They also didn't have annoying little movies we couldn't skip and like you said in one of your earlier reviews, they had alot more imagination back then like a French Chief riding a prey mantis with a shot-gun that fires raptors!

I like how you use the face paint from Heath Ledgers Joker to describe dark things!

 

[HadesWTF]

I laughed. Much better than the last video.

Castle Crashers was awesome, but I had all of the aforementioned problems.

 

[Lavi]

-_- Yes fanboys, Yahtzee = God.

 

[perfectimo]

yeah yahtzee may be funny but it seems like he just hates a lot of game for next to no reason

ps. you can come back and play mario, you really can't with gta4

 

[MasterOfHisOwnDomain]

Pretty good, but it doesn't come close to the nail shavings of the console run-down and the ilk.

 

[perfectimo]

sunshine was like 64 mashed with crap, overall the game was alright as a game it just wasn't a "mario" game

 

[smallharmlesskitten]

Sometimes you truly are an idiot yahtzee

 

[COR 2000]

I thought that Yahtzee is going to review Star Wars: The Force Unleashed but retro stuff is good too

I thought the same thing. Oh well...

 

[niall27]

Sorry mate but i really do think you have jumped the shark..

Ive been watching for about 2/3 months and although i shall keep coming back im just not laughing anymore mate

 

[Cybergangster]

...im just not laughing anymore mate

Agreed - I've been following ZP pretty much from the start and the last few months haven't been up to standard - or maybe I'm just becoming decensitised?

I was amused by the Nintendo fanboy bait though

 

[perfectimo]

Agreed - I've been following ZP pretty much from the start and the last few months haven't been up to standard - or maybe I'm just becoming decensitised?

same. he used to be very funny, it kinda sucks how he's gotten repetitive and a cliche of himself.

 

[Eiseman]

Hmph, it had to happen at some point. If you base your job around hating popular things, your followers will end up doing the same thing. Then once you yourself become popular, they will begin to hate you.

The ultimate irony is that this is probably exactly what Yahtzee wants.

 

[Shinkada]

A bit funnier than usual, but more importantly, I love it when people wail on reminiscence in gaming.

To all the people inevitably defending Ocarina of Time: Stop being dickbags.

EDIT: The constant, and usual stream of people saying ZMG YATZEY U NOT FUNAY NEMORE has, for this episode only, gone from frustrating to hilarious because YOU'RE PROOVING THE EXACT POINT HE'S MENTIONING IN THE FUCKING VIDEO.

He isn't getting less funny, you twats have all just ruined it by quoting him five thousand times a day and thus becoming too used to his style. I, however, haven't been going around quoting him at every waking moment as if he was Monty Python, Maddox, Chapelle or anyone else nearly-ruined by constant quotation, and thus I still find him hilarious.

None to blame but yourselves.

 

[tysonayt]

The Bionic Arm works well, but wtf, Hitler

 

[perfectimo]

i don't hate him, i hate how it seems like recently he's being hating stuff and coming up with his standard insult without having any... i don't know passion. and no i don't quote him, quoting in general is lame ie. the simpsons

 

[RussDCA]

WTF have you guys done to these videos? The last three, I haven't been able to download & convert for my iPod making me a walking Escapist & Zero Punctuation advert.

And.. I really don't think an advert should more than double the video length.

And... Isn't it about time we had 640x480 videos?

..... Also... Yahtzee. You still rock though :-D

 

[crazyforestgnome]

I know - let's make controversial comments for the sake of it...Come on Yahtzee you used to be better than this.

Everyone knows Mario Sunshine was TERRIBLE! And as for insulting Ocarina of Time, the greatest game ever in the Zelda series...nonsense.

Sonic 2, far better than ANY 3D sonic game ever made since.

Retro games are still awesome!