Shower Thoughts MK2

Drathnoxis

Became a mass murderer for your sake
Legacy
Sep 23, 2010
5,644
2,032
118
Just off-screen
Country
Canada
Gender
Male
Just signed up for a dating app for the first time, zero expectations of actually finding anyone.
It doesn't seem like this is ever going to get anywhere. It's been around 8 months and I still haven't even finished setting up my profile. I finally assembled 6 pictures of myself that I'm satisfied with so I spent an hour or two scrolling through the prompt options for the fourth time and none of them seem applicable to me. Where's the "I'm kind of boring and antisocial, but..." prompt? That's the one I need.

Also, doesn't help that the thought of putting myself out there is giving me a ton of anxiety and I haven't even done anything yet. Maybe I should just give up now and then kill myself in 20 years when the thought of my wasted youth and missed opportunities becomes too much to bear.
 

XsjadoBlayde

~it ends here~
Apr 29, 2020
3,309
3,432
118
"Current thing"

Every now and then some reactionary conservative pops up with another stale repetitive attempt to strawman people they've committed their remaining brain functionality on hating and obstructing to the bitter end, and one that particularly boggles the mind is the (always)blue(always)short-haired(always)feminist(always)wearing-or-holding(always)"Current thing."



"Current."




"Thing."



As opposed to what?

Past thing?

Thing that has already been sorted and shelved?

Non-existent future thing?

Sorry, not wanting to blow anyone's mind here, but: all of politics is "current thing." All news is "current thing." All unfixed problems remain "current thing." EVERY SINGLE PERSON, OBJECT, POLICY, SONG, DREAM, POEM, PET, PLAN, DOMESTIC VIOLENCE INCIDENT, INTERNATIONAL AIRSTRIKE, LAUNDERED GENOCIDE, SUDDEN BOWEL MOVEMENT EXISTING OR MANIFESTING IN THIS MOMENT IS "CURRENT THING."



"Current thing."

You know what else is current thing? Anti-trans panics. Conservative policies and talking points. Jordan Peterson losing his frail old mind. And yes, even the very strawman caricatures these calcified dinosaurs love to spread around with the words "current thing" on.

Don't be dumb.

Have some self respect.

Think about insults before making them, try to be witty at least.

Perhaps even invent new ones!

And maybe.

Just maybe.

Embrace "current thing."

Because the grim reality is, we can't fucking escape it. Trust, some of us have tried many times.


All of us are "Current thing."
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: BrawlMan

Drathnoxis

Became a mass murderer for your sake
Legacy
Sep 23, 2010
5,644
2,032
118
Just off-screen
Country
Canada
Gender
Male
I wonder how many men put hot sauce in their used condoms to stop women from stealing their sperm?
 

Bob_McMillan

Elite Member
Aug 28, 2014
5,345
2,006
118
Country
Philippines
Um...does it count if they are like me and do them badly?

But yeah, the time and effort to do them well...nope, too hard.
Honestly, it does count. I would never be able to l buy some pricey minis, paint them amateurishly, and still have fun. That's pretty impressive. My brain would never let me rest if my Space Marine didn't look exactly like the box art.
 

Chimpzy

Simian Abomination
Legacy
Escapist +
Apr 3, 2020
12,666
9,030
118
Imagine if real life had achievements. They just pop up over your head.

So you're just going about your day, nothing going on, and you get one that says "Narrowly avoided death"
 
  • Like
Reactions: BrawlMan

Xprimentyl

Made you look...
Legacy
Aug 13, 2011
6,551
4,841
118
Plano, TX
Country
United States
Gender
Male
Imagine Homelander doing a blind playthrough of the Elden Ring DLC. My word, what would HIS rage quitting look like?? He'd probably dispatched The Seven to "visit" every member of the dev team before showing up personally at Miyazaki's front door.
 
  • Like
Reactions: BrawlMan

Drathnoxis

Became a mass murderer for your sake
Legacy
Sep 23, 2010
5,644
2,032
118
Just off-screen
Country
Canada
Gender
Male
I wonder roughly how many Olympic sized swimming pools could be filled with the amount of semen expelled by the human race every day?

So the current global population is 8.2 Billion, divided by two to get 4.1 billion males. Now multiply by 80% to filter out children and the elderly. 3.28 Billion. Now let's assume that every man ejaculates today an average of 3mL. That gives us 9.84 million Liters of semen. One Olympic swimming pools holds a Mega Liter, which is one million Liters, so conveniently we fill approximately 9.84 Olympic swimming pools.

Thank you @Gordon_4 for sparking this thought.
 

Bob_McMillan

Elite Member
Aug 28, 2014
5,345
2,006
118
Country
Philippines
Do you guys think they just straight up forgot this forum exists?

Edit: they as in the Escapist.
 

Drathnoxis

Became a mass murderer for your sake
Legacy
Sep 23, 2010
5,644
2,032
118
Just off-screen
Country
Canada
Gender
Male
Do you guys think they just straight up forgot this forum exists?

Edit: they as in the Escapist.
Maybe, but I think it's probably kept around for search engine optimization. I remember Nick mentioning it once as the reason they bothered to port over all the legacy posts.
 

Bob_McMillan

Elite Member
Aug 28, 2014
5,345
2,006
118
Country
Philippines
Maybe, but I think it's probably kept around for search engine optimization. I remember Nick mentioning it once as the reason they bothered to port over all the legacy posts.
Interesting. My guess was that our presence at least in some way contributes to some success metric like site visits or whatever.

I was wondering because I accidentally went to the Escapist homepage, and they don't even link the forums any more.
 
  • Like
Reactions: BrawlMan