A Declaration of War

[Mikeybb]

My only appreciable talents are surviving nuclear war, subsisting off soap flakes and looking good in a bow tie.
I must remain neutral.
As such, I shall watch your conflict with interest and rise from the rubble to claim the world from you disgusting mammals with your freaky endoskeletons.

 

[johnnyLupine]

You said you had beer right? Let the plundering begin!

Trust me geman Vikings have the best beer, I stole some october booze from those bavarian celts!
With Donar (Thor) on our side even the weather will turn aginst those landlubbers!

You've changed your flags, I see. You're dedicated to the cause of getting all of their ale and mead, time to set sail, with me manning the cannons and you crashing through the waves they don't stand a chance. Meet at Nancy's tavern to drink the spoils?

 

[El Comandante]

Meet at Nancy's tavern to drink the spoils?

I´ll bring my horn, you go and get the wenches! Our enemys blood and brainbits will decorate my axe!

 

[WindKnight]

Not sure if I should put on my Fuu Hououji garb and go neutral feild medic, or grab a tin helmet and hind behind some sandbags.

 

[SirDerpy]

snip

Wombo combo?

I don't speak esperanto very well, but... the bathrooms are just around the corner on the right. Can't miss 'em

Verstehst du? Das Klo ist gleich um die Ecke!

Was willst du von mir? Ungerechtigkeit sterben Liga abschaum!

Dulce et decorum est pro UNoPF mori!

My weapon of choice is the spear. No, I've never heard of Freud, who is that?

 

[davidmc1158_v1legacy]

Not sure if I should put on my Fuu Hououji garb and go neutral feild medic, or grab a tin helmet and hind behind some sandbags.

Fuu Hououji garb with a tin helmet?


Arise all ye sons of the Crawling Chaos! The fools have fallen to our wiles and fight amongst themselves! The stars are finally right and the followers of the Old Ones shall rejoice at their return!

Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu r'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn! Ia! Ia! Wgah'nagl fhtagn!

 

[KaZuYa]

I have nothing to add except

 

[LostCrusader]

Sign me up! Death to the forces of united fun.

I guess for a weapon mastery I would have to go with fighting with a spear/polearm like Zhao Yun or Guan Yu. I will need the reach to keep their fun from getting on me.

Spoiler

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

Y'all know where to find me. [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/groups/chat/The-Internet-Bunker]

Because...

 

[Haerthan]

To all minions of the warring factions:

STOP this madness, we have better enemies to fight: The Aliens.

Which aliens you ask? The ones who can read our minds, the blue alien chicks that want to take over the galaxy. We stop them. They must be stopped. Otherwise we shall fall under Bioware's control and learn to love the ME3 ending. Fight it brothers and sisters, fight for your freedom.y

Edit: I really like swords, especially katanas and broadswords.

Nope. Bugger uniting, if there's going to be a war I'm becoming a pirate. Someone is going to have to crash a ship onto the battlefield and drunkenly swagger in, pistols blazing and it might as well be me. You lads think your safe on land? HA!

also my ship plays this song, that way you can at least die listening
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=605NHDqy7R4

Oh hell yea my son. That is an awesome song. I have the band in my collection. 10 bucks says my ship is bigger than yours matey. With cannons and things. oh and Daryl Dixon.

 

[Elfgore]

The Kawaii Champion has come! Fear me, scum of Injustice.

Spoiler: You don't know Kawaii until I lay this shit down!

Spoiler: You

Spoiler: know

Spoiler: Absolutely

Spoiler: Nothing

Spoiler: Until

Spoiler: You

Spoiler: Fight

Spoiler: Me

I suggest you curs flee before I'm forced to bring out the dark side of my Kawaii!

 

[Tanis]

Weebaboos be like:
OMG SWORD ONLINE PRO-TAG IS MASTA SWORAZ-MAHN!

And, I be like:
Guts is, like, wut?

I mean, uh?
What's the topic about again?

 

[Something Amyss]

Which side represents social justice? As a social justice warrior, I must know!

 

[Fiz_The_Toaster]

I shall do what I normally do when these things pop up...

Spoiler

Y'all know where to find me. [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/groups/chat/The-Internet-Bunker]

Because...

There's a chat for that?

The more you know...

Which side represents social justice? As a social justice warrior, I must know!

Hey!

And what about the social justice mage? Or social justice rogue? Hell, even the social justice barbarian? You classist bastard! How DARE you show your bias on class choice and build. How do you sleep?!

 

[RipRoaringWaterfowl]

Mercenary available for hire. (Me!)

Will work for muffins. (Take that as you will.)

Can use and withstand aforementioned disturbing industrial music. (Check the avatar.)

Either side can inquire. (Act quickly!)

Until then, will watch the fireworks. (Ooh, pretty!)

 

[Something Amyss]

And what about the social justice mage? Or social justice rogue? Hell, even the social justice barbarian? You classist bastard! How DARE you show your bias on class choice and build. How do you sleep?!

I'll have you know, I am a social justice rogue. "warrior" isn't the class name. How conveeeeenient that your mind immediately went to class. Clearly, you are classist yourself! Haha!

 

[Fiz_The_Toaster]

And what about the social justice mage? Or social justice rogue? Hell, even the social justice barbarian? You classist bastard! How DARE you show your bias on class choice and build. How do you sleep?!

I'll have you know, I am a social justice rogue. "warrior" isn't the class name. How conveeeeenient that your mind immediately went to class. Clearly, you are classist yourself! Haha!

What?!

I will have you know that I am a social justice rogue myself, and I take offense to your accusations! You never stated you stance in class, so what did you expect me to believe? Unless you're trying to dirty the social justice rogue name and bring our whole stance down.

#notallrogues

 

[the December King]

I was really confused, and tried to figure out who was who, in the midst of this insane battlefield. What was at stake here? Why the senseless violence? I tried my best to help the fallen, seeing pastry marks and laser scorches darkening the twisted landscape for miles, the wounded writhing in terror, or amusement...

until I got hit in the face by what I can only assume was some of the most cute little girls anime has to offer...

and , through a moment of weakness, let loose, the 'cats' of war...

Spoiler

May god have mercy on my soul... for free, if it takes more than 30 minutes, of course.

My martial art/weapon would be, if I could find and capture them, to wield a rabid rape-apologist by the collar in one hand, while swinging a shrieking SJW by the ankles in the other! Now THAT'S privilege.

Unsurvivable attacks, really.

I can barely wield them, because I stubbed my baby toe. Once.

The weapons are like proton pack streams, though. NEVER cross them. Y'all know what I mean.

Which side represents social justice? As a social justice warrior, I must know!

Uhhh... Zachary, could I, ummm... could I... wield you?

It'll just be till I pass out from gassy food, I promise.

 

[Something Amyss]

What?!

I will have you know that I am a social justice rogue myself, and I take offense to your accusations! You never stated you stance in class, so what did you expect me to believe? Unless you're trying to dirty the social justice rogue name and bring our whole stance down.

#notallrogues

Oh, come on. You're a fake social justice rogue. No true social justice rogue would say such things! Clearly, you're co-opting my label!

#RogueGate

Uhhh... Zachary, could I, ummm... could I... wield you?

It'll just be till I pass out from gassy food, I promise.

You have my blades.

 

[Imperioratorex Caprae]

One warning, the Henchgoats are ready for deployment. Victory confetti has been acquired and set to go. They will bathe in your blood and pepper your rotting carcasses with victory... confetti.
You've been warned.