Aversion to Children
- Thread starter Paragon Fury
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that absolutely spine-chilling moment when you realize that some people actually took the Embryodead album as a representation of realityAramis Night said:
The only reason I'll be able to sleep tonight is that this thought pattern is rare.
Damn good album, by the way, just one with a horrendously broken concept with no perspective.
You're not alone. My fiancee has a bigger dislike of children than I do and I'm also considering getting a vasectomy. I thought for years that I might eventually want to have kids, or be in a relationship with someone that does. I still don't want kids and thankfully she does not either. I didn't care for children very much when I was a child, I routinely regret things I did and said as a kid, and I was pretty miserable for most of my life thus far. There's no reason to thrust that on another human being who may be genetically inclined to have a similar experience, all so I can feel good about myself and contribution to the world. I can't tell you the number of times my parents would brag about me, while inside I felt horrible about myself and the life I was living. I certainly can't put another human being through the American education system, look him/her in the eye, and tell them that that is what is best for them.
We also live on a planet of billions of people, so even if I'm a one in a million type of guy, there could be 40 more people just like me having very similar babies that I would.
We also live on a planet of billions of people, so even if I'm a one in a million type of guy, there could be 40 more people just like me having very similar babies that I would.
I disagree, but that's a given. I get how one might see it as a broken concept, as dubious as I find that. But no perspective? That is a claim I just can't follow. His perspective was made clear by the dedication. It is one of the most beautiful things I have ever read. It may be an uncomfortable meaning for some, but it is clearly a perspective. One I happen to share. At least you appreciate good music. Embryodead is the gold standard of Wumpscut albums. Just a pity he hasn't done anything worth listening to since Wreath of Barbs.lacktheknack said:
I think that, on average, I meet just as much terrible adults as terrible children. Once you get to know them I think both will generally be pleasant.
As for the cost, well, you can go buy porches thats everyones personal choice. But you hear from everyone that children can be really cool to have around, you know, for not dying alone. My 95 year old grandmother is quickly running out of friends her age.
And additionally, in a sense it is pretty selfish to say "Well everyone that came before me inhereted money and stuff from their parents. But I'm the end of the line, I'm keeping all this money." Nothing really wrong with it but it is literally just thinking about yourself, so no matter how you spin it that is 'selfish'.
As for the cost, well, you can go buy porches thats everyones personal choice. But you hear from everyone that children can be really cool to have around, you know, for not dying alone. My 95 year old grandmother is quickly running out of friends her age.
And additionally, in a sense it is pretty selfish to say "Well everyone that came before me inhereted money and stuff from their parents. But I'm the end of the line, I'm keeping all this money." Nothing really wrong with it but it is literally just thinking about yourself, so no matter how you spin it that is 'selfish'.
When I said "no perspective", I didn't mean "literally doesn't have a point of view", I meant "thinks his narrow view is a standard". His viewpoint is, as you said, that "life is difficult, has no reason, and has no sense".Aramis Night said:
From where I stand, that's a baffling and completely untrue statement. For MOST people, it's an untrue statement.
That's what I meant by "having no perspective".
And yeah, he DEFINITELY went downhill in the last decade. "Boneshaker Baby" is probably the worst piece of industrial usic I've ever listened to. Thankfully, we've still got the likes of "Black Death" to listen to.
Ah I see. So you find meaning in life still. Enjoy that while it lasts. I've learned that having such high's of experience just makes the eventual despair that much worse when your reason for having it disappears. It is why I envy stillborn infants.lacktheknack said:
And since you brought it up: I hate "Boneshaker Baby". It was one thing when he was dedicating good music to miscarriages. It became something else when he started creating musical stillborn's like that disgraceful piece of garbage. He needs to just stop and retire.
Only if your family has a huge amount of money that's passed from generation to generation, or a long-standing family property or something (basically if you're an aristocrat or a millionaire). Most people only pass on money they've earned themselves, anything they inherited from their own parents is most likely long gone.Rblade said:
And besides, it's not like your money just disappears if you die childless. You can leave it to whoever you want - a charity, a friend, a partner (which is actually who most people leave everything to anyway), or even the next generation in the form of nieces, nephews and/or godchildren. Hardly selfish, unless you want to blow the lot on an outrageously extravagant funeral or something.
So in other words, a person might want to have kids in order to have someone take care of them when they're elderly. How is looking at an innocent life that you created and considering them your future caretaker, anything other than the definition of selfish? I also do not understand the inheritance example either. A person can't "keep the money to himself" because you'll die just like everyone else does. The money will go somewhere, most likely to charity to help even more people (or to hospitals and skilled nursing facilities who will actually take care of you when you're old).Rblade said:
Oh man, same here. I've always had this legit fear of pregnancy to the point where I don't really like seeing pregnant people and my first instinct when a friend gets pregnant is "wow, my sympathies" before it occurs to me that this is what most people actually want.Eamar said:
I'll be 32 soon, and my stance on kids has never wavered since I was a kid myself. I do have a great relationship with my mother, and wouldn't mind having an adult person like me someday to have around, but unless I could make a fully grown human spring out of my head like a Greek god, I really don't see that happening.
I don't mind being around good kids, though. Kids can be cool, as long as I'm not expected to know how to look after them or take care of them. v:
No joke, when I found out my cousin was pregnant (and saw a scan picture) I actually felt nauseated for the rest of the day. Thank god she didn't tell me in person, that would have been incredibly awkward. At least my friends know about this though, so they'll be prepared for my inappropriate looks of horror when the time comesChemical Alia said:
Same here. I'm 25 and I have never liked or wanted kids, for as long as I can remember.Chemical Alia said:
What irritates me is when everyone dismisses this feeling and says stuff like "You'll probably change your mind", as if it's somehow not legit to not being interested in having kids. And I understood when they dismissed me when I was 13 years old, but I'm not really a child anymore, and my opinion has not changed in the slightest about this issue. I'm not interested in kids, I don't like them, I don't find them engaging in any way. Usually when I see a baby, I just don't want to have any contact with it and nothing they do is endearing to me. Especially when they eat. When I see a baby eating, I get the urge to leave the room because I can't stand the mess they're making. It's simply disgusting, for the lack of a less dramatic word.
Recently I made a half-joke about wanting to be sterilized and everyone just lost their shit and started saying how I'm still too young and that I'll change my opinion soon. Why is this such a huge issue? Some people don't want to have kids, I think that's hardly the most incredible opinion in the world. It's always been like that, some people just don't procreate.
If I ever think about a child, I'd rather adopt one, slightly older. I really dislike babies, but I guess a kid that's like... 3-5 years old would be alright. All in all, I find it more appealing for many reasons; not going through pregnancy myself being one of them and the other being that I'll help a child that already exists in this world and has no family.
Oh wow. My two cousins both got pregnant within two months of each other, and their babies recently turned one. They're well behaved boys, and pretty cute and smart (as far as babies go, haha), and I'm super happy that they get to have that experience of raising their kids together, with their own parents there to help out and all that. But when they announced it, I was so glad I had heard it through the grapevine ahead of time and was able to practice my WOW THAT'S SO AWESOME response. It just takes me a while to grasp the idea of it being a good thing, even when I know it is, because of my own personal aversions.Eamar said:No joke, when I found out my cousin was pregnant (and saw a scan picture) I actually felt nauseated for the rest of the day. Thank god she didn't tell me in person, that would have been incredibly awkward. At least my friends know about this though, so they'll be prepared for my inappropriate looks of horror when the time comes
Yeah, some of us just grow up with different ideals of what we want in life. I don't like the idea that it's everyone's duty to sacrifice things that are important to a person to have kids, who I guess then will grow up to have to do the same, and so on. I went to the doctor for my yearly physical last month, and I got my first "well you know, you're getting to that age where you realllllllllly need to be thinking about having some kids" lecture, and I felt almost embarrassed to respond.Beliyal said:
I seem to be some exceptional Ninja hero in my spacial and soundwise behaviour in public spaces. I move the shopping cart to the side when looking at shelves, I understand when someone walking behind me is faster, so I can make room. With other people around me, I don't abruptly stop in narrow spots because something's on the phone. When the ATM has just given me money, I don't keep standing around to r...e....a.....d the recipe, which I had printed for some reason. I even understand queues; I mean, crazy shit! Somehow, I never roam the streets bawling ugly songs!
This is where I get angry. I mean... how do you people actually maintain your thinking here? To every few weeks vehemently single out children as THE source of annoyance when there's a world of obnoxious pricks out there WHO, and this is important SHOULD FUCKING KNOW BETTER than to be a whatever_adjective_fits_here_that_relates_to_childlike_behaviour idiot
Seriously.[footnote]thefuck?[/footnote]