'Be a man'!

[Wereduck]

I can't believe nobody's mentioned Vito Corleone's advice to Johnny Fontane from The Godfather! It's the ideal situation for a "man the **** up" and a wonderful example of how to deliver the speech.

In other situations it's not nearly as appropriate, highly unlikely to help and very possibly harmful for all the reasons eloquently explained by previous posters. The expression has it's place but it's certainly not the panacea that some imagine it to be.

 

[Sexual Harassment Panda]

It's a pretty dumb choice of words, but it's not the big deal that some of you are making it out to be.

Ignoring gender, some people do need to be told to stop being so self-involved and subsoquently inventing their own problems. It's arguably better to mock sometimes, by being overly sympathetic you can legitimize anxieties and allow people to dwell on problems that just aren't there.

If friends come to you with "problems", it's probably because they want help putting things into perspective. If the "problem" is bullshit, call it bullshit...it's for the best.

I don't extend this to genuine mental illness. I have a friend with longstanding depression, I just listen and ask questions...I know my input is useless on things I don't understand.

 

[Death God]

Well, real men cry at pain and deaths, but if they are whining about their lives and bawling at everything, then not isn't manly. But besides the crying, you know, chopping wood and drinking beer and growing beards. You know, manly stuff.

 

[teutonicman]

First thing that came to my mind,

In the end it comes down to, CUT YER BITCHIN'!

 

[chinangel]

as a girl, I feel that this 'man up' thing is all levels of ridiculous. It's like this silly 'man card' joke. Men are put under pressure to behave a certain way and to act in certain fashions. It's really not fair to them. I couldn't imagine waht it's like to be a boy, worse if you're feminine in any fashion.

 

[Kingsman]

You cry when you have a massive traumatic experience dealt to you. Anything less is just being a pussy.

Bullies? Man up.
Bad day? Man up.
Failed at something? MAN THE FUCK UP.

Most people will be crying about the former, or the latter LOOOOOOONG after they should've cried it out of their system. It results in the men of the world having a fair number of fairies amongst their population and the women getting the illusion that they're superior than men at everything.

Flaming will begin in 10...really, thats a very sexist, insensitive and stupid thing to say.

And that's a very liberal, passive-aggressive, and conformist thing to say.

See? Now we each hate each other and nothing is resolved.

 

[Jester00]

"be a man" . what a stupid sentence.

 

[Scarecrow]

You cry when you have a massive traumatic experience dealt to you. Anything less is just being a pussy.

Bullies? Man up.
Bad day? Man up.
Failed at something? MAN THE FUCK UP.

Most people will be crying about the former, or the latter LOOOOOOONG after they should've cried it out of their system. It results in the men of the world having a fair number of fairies amongst their population and the women getting the illusion that they're superior than men at everything.

Flaming will begin in 10...really, thats a very sexist, insensitive and stupid thing to say.

And that's a very liberal, passive-aggressive, and conformist thing to say.

See? Now we each hate each other and nothing is resolved.

So it seems...how about we just agree to disagree? I know it sounds lame, but in things like this, it's the only thing you can really do.

 

[TheYellowCellPhone]

I'm not one of those people who shout, "be a man!" but I am one of those people who give you a "are you serious?" look about your problem.

I know how serious shit can be, even with the littlest problems, but being melodramatic about it and complainging and 'wallowing in self-pity' deserves a slap of reality.

 

[technoted]

Because most people aren't actually depressed and full of teenage angst that they call depression over stupid and menial things I fully support the "Man Up" approach.

 

[Kingsman]

So it seems...how about we just agree to disagree? I know it sounds lame, but in things like this, it's the only thing you can really do.

Perfect. Now stop diverting the thread topic.

 

[FalloutJack]

I've never said "Be a man!" in all seriousness, as in those actual words as anything else but a joke.

WHat I HAVE done, and you can put another star on Jack's badass chart for this, is deliver a logical process of working one's self-esteem back into full swing that would equate to manning up. But the way I SAY things is understanding and well-delivered. People feeling bad about themselves who have a clusterfuck of problems can really only help themselves, because many even resist interventions. So, if the only thing YOU can do is give them the proverbial kick in the ass, then "Be a man!" is just insulting. It implies that they weren't a man in the first place, which is demeaning. You give them your push in a manner that makes them want to get going, and then hopefully they do.

 

[AceDefective]

"Man up" doesn't work it just makes them mad at you

 

[Peteron]

It angers me sometimes that people whine publicly even though their answer is right in front of them. I for one do not pity others, even if that is their goal. They should man up. Not only does it help if you are actually depressed, but it stops you from whining if you are just desperate for attention.

 

[Hman121]

It depends on whether the problem is trivial or not. If so, you're crying over nothing.

 

[RadioActiveChimp]

Watch Gurren Lagann and you'll learn what manly is.

 

[Kiju]

Depends, really. "Man up" is one of the stupidest things I can think of to say if someone is being sad and depressed. Now, I'm not saying it's exact definition is a bad idea, since it roughly translates to: "toughen up and get over it" but to phrase it as something a "man" should do isn't exactly intelligent.

It's an adult thing to do, to get over something, even if it's pretty bad. There are some things you don't want to get over, however, but you should at least be able to move on. I like to use the phrase "Grow up", since it's a bit more correct in it's usage, than "man up".

Children cry and sulk and complain about their problems, but never do anything about them. Adults suck it up and do something about them, not just men.

 

[wolf92]

Sometimes you've got to reach down and pull out your big boy balls, man up and take charge

 

[ryderawsome]

i believe the ancient greeks achieved manhood by climbing atop mount olympus and consuming the still beating heart of a freshly defeated god of thunder and lighting. then again everyone from back then was a liar so who's to say really

 

[IThinkImASofa]

Alright first post, well no time like the present.
ok so "be a man". Honestly i suppose i don't have much of a reaction to that at this point. The saying is defined by the emotions its bred over the years, and its far to old to be held responsible for its direct relationship to the male definition. Today for me its synonymous with "be strong" and has little to do with what it means to be a man. Truthfully it no longer defines what it is to be a man simply because its associated with emotional fortitude and not all men today are emotionally barren. Not that there is any thing wrong with that, men in touch with their emotions will at the very least be more sane if not more successful in the big city workplace, where this kind of persona is favorable to relieve stress and create a calm work environment.
But i digest<lol, I think the real issue being raised here it whether or not the saying is an "attack" on the woman's ability to be strong, and although i agree that the association of man with strong is an unfortunately misguided development, it is also a natural one due to the way that the term has been used. The truth in my mind, is that the saying when used today is only used in passing when the man saying it assumes the receiver is also a man, and is being used not as an attack on the woman population, but on the cultural outlook of the times we live in as it relates to men. Whether you look at music or popular television programs or the like, its quite obvious that the effeminate handsome man dominates the scene, and this is at least what i speak against if i am ever to utter the phrase. As i said there's nothing wrong with this kind of man- but an entire generation of them would drive me right up the wall, mostly because the same culture creating them also tells them its ok to be a giant bag of douche(not all of them of course but far to many).
So when i say "be a man" i say be different, don't be troubled by that which matters to your facebook status, or girlfriend status, or which vampire you favor most or whatever, find your own path, be your own PERSON, and be strong.