eBay Bans Spells, Potions, and Curses

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Cody Holden

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May 4, 2011
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I used to get angry at scammers. Now, I just feel a bit sad. I could have been making money selling bogus spells this whole time? That seems a lot easier than this job thing!
 

IanBrazen

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Oct 17, 2008
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I believe that its every Americans right to be a moron and buy a spell on ebay. thats what makes capitalism soooo wonderful
 

Two-A

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Aug 1, 2012
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What?. Should... should I be mad?

I guess it's good that eBay is taking these things out of their site, it just seems like a really obvious scam
 

Twilight_guy

Sight, Sound, and Mind
Nov 24, 2008
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Andrewtheeviscerator said:
What! how will I get my daily dose of Jesus blood now!
If you're Catholic, go to mass everyday. (HA HA, my religion makes your joke slightly less funny)

OT: This might put some gypsies out of business and its going to put some cheap charlatans out of business (the higher class charlatans have actual stores to peddle there wares). I suppose EBay has to put up rules to protect itself from people selling illegal things and it probably has some duty to protect people from buying bogus magical items. I think if people really want them they should have access to buy them, even if they don't work, but if they've been getting complaints or they want to maintain a standard of product quality, I can see them putting in this new rule in. Personally, if you really think that love potion is going to work I don't see why you shouldn't be able to buy it, I know old ladies that buy crosses to ward of the devil and some people would say its garbage.
 

FantomOmega

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Jun 14, 2012
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BoogieManFL said:
Sseth said:
As much as I make fun of this stuff like everyone else, there's always a little part inside of me that wishes it was true.

"Just... what if.."
The world would be a horrible place if people could really have mystical powers. There are far too many people who'd abuse them and we'd all have known it existed for a long time.
I know at least one idiot that wants to summon Cthulhu and don't get me started on those Chaos Gods cults that keep popping up like weeds

And I SHUDDER in absolute FEAR at what the Japanese would summon with their obsession with tentacles and giant c**ked demon beasts ****** schoolgirls...

The Hentai Industry as we know at would collapse like a drunkard that had one drink too many, tumbling into the gutter face first

At least one person will summon a succubus... good luck with that...
 

Beautiful End

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Feb 15, 2011
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wh84 9 9ph';;W[42=[Y v wgi;WRTb;bk;SJRnlEH^5WK``NJSDG91=-0-*318eth426

Oh...so sorry. I was trying to type that while I was still in my werewolf form. How silly of me.

Okay, sarcasm aside, I didn't even know eBay sold that. Hell, I didn't even know people would buy that! Look, if this was real, I'd be the first one throwing my money at the screen. Really. But luckily, my superpower is common sense. So no.

Oh, wait, i got one more.

So I guess eBay has turned into Templars and then those guys out of business will become apostates.

No, wait, that wasn't that good...
 

PinkiePyro

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Sep 26, 2010
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and thus ended an era of the rest of the internet laughing at those stupid enough to buy a love spell on Ebay
 

Caffiene

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Jul 21, 2010
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Mike Kayatta said:
eBay user Fiona-lunar has just the ticket: a "Powerful magic spell of werewolf transformation"
See, this is why eBay is banning this stuff... its obviously fake. Everybody knows that real spellcasters add an extra "k" to the end of the word "magic".
 

William Ossiss

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Apr 8, 2010
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Fun fact: the people who believe this stuff do NOT tend to sell their abilities. in fact, they look down on people who do so.
 

Thorvan

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May 15, 2009
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Okay, as an actual Wiccan (Or Witch, I take either one) who ACTUALLY knows a few things on the topic, let me make a potentially pointless attempt to clear things up; I'm not the most knowledgeable on the topic, but I feel it my duty to clear some things up.

First of all, Mythrandia is being hilarious.

Being a Witch/Wizard/Druid etc. Is actually a legitimate, fairly old religion, you probably know it as paganism, and was actually one of the more predominate western European religions; We're pretty sure, it's a little hard to tell considering that the Catholic church kinda rolled in and destroyed every trace of it. What bits did survive eventually came into the US in the mid-50s as Wiccanism or Paganism and has been a growing religion ever since. There's probably a few covens around where you live, you can usually google it. Like all faiths, please try to treat it with a baseline of respect.

At the onslaught of the Harry Potter craze, it saw a HUGE boost in membership. Unfortunately, most of the people joining were silly teenage girls, who misunderstood the faith as being less about spirituality, ethics, internal focus and peace, and more about OMG I CAN BE REAL WITCH AND MAKE SPELLS AND TINGS. Spells, potions are a factor of some Pagan's lives, but more than anything are a method of personal focus, meditation and spiritual reaffirmation- I'd equate them more with Christian mass than Wingardium Leviosa. Selling spells and potions is almost NEVER a thing you'd do, and is born out of a gross misunderstanding of the faith, or an attempt to prey on those who misunderstand. The most you'll see actual Pagans selling is candles, ceremonial knives, stuff to DO magic, but selling magic itself is really not a thing you do.

Anyways, just figured I'd put that into context for you. It's important to have at least a SLIGHT grasp of the topic you're speaking about. FYI, I've been off-practicing for a while and probably forgot a bit of my history on the topic, (It's also really early, and I'm tired) so you can find out more at http://www.religioustolerance.org/neo_paga.htm

As for the issue itself, I understand that they're banning this out of a desire to protect their customers from scams and injuring products, but I can't help but feel it's born out of a little bit of conservative political meddling. Still, it's not enough to really bother me.
 

Mr F.

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Jul 11, 2012
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Uh. Just... Skimming most of this thread. You lot know why. If I read all of the huge posts written by Mythrandia it would be a good hour until I would be able to do anything. Seriously.

My brain has turned to mush though. Just from contact with non-sensical word walls. I automatically try to read things, get about 300 words in then my brain just starts to scream.

"Why, For the love of god, why! Why are you reading such non-sensical horse bollocks! Save yourself!"

And then I stop.

More on topic?

Bout time. I fucking hate this shite. I hope eBay steps up and bans the selling of anything related to Homeopathy or anything sold by a "Nutritionist" (Fyi, I am now a Nutritionist. Because the term that requires a degree is Dietitian. If you state you are a Nutritionist, you are now a Nutritionist. The word is meaningless and there is no regulatory body. Go forth and scam, Brethren). Life would be easier, or at least happier, if the scam artists of this world were regulated into the nether hells.
 

Britisheagle

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May 21, 2009
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This is the best article ever! I had no idea these things exisited on eBay.

It's almost as good as the time I saw someone selling toast that may be cold by the time it was delivered.
 

Sigmund Av Volsung

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Dec 11, 2009
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NO!! MY STOCKS!!

CONFOUND YOU ZARGON, YOU TRAITOR!!

NOW WHERE WILL PEOPLE GO FOR SAFE*, RELIABLE*, DESTRUCTIVE SPELLS AND INCANTATIONS NOW?

Oh, yeah that's right ; amazon.com

*Safe= may endanger the lives of you and your loved ones including household pets.
*Reliable= may summon demon lords from other dimensions and hell itself if some spells are not pronounced in the specified accent.

OT; I can't believe it took eBay this long to ban spells, potions etc. what happened this year that caused them to do so?
 

CaptainMarvelous

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May 9, 2012
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Mythrandia said:
William Ossiss said:
Fun fact: the people who believe this stuff do NOT tend to sell their abilities. in fact, they look down on people who do so.
Umm there are some people psychics who are guns for hire, like Joe McMoneagle is right now. Google Remote viewing workshop joe mcmoneagle and watch the video. He says "do you think this is free?" and "where's your checkbook?" (referring to processing a remote viewing task).

I sure as hell knew that I would be out there exploring or managing my allegiance or something if I wasn't busy focusign all my attention on my client. The going rate for that was not $0, it was $25/hour.

There are certain services a wizard must charge for becaues there has to be a price for strangers who want to do certain things. Like for exmaple if somebody wants to have a near death experience, with the hope that it will trigger an out of body experience, and they want to do this under controlled conditions, then you have some cost basis for procurring the herbs and the potions and the powders and the talismans. Sometiems a wizard will front the costs, because he wants to cast spells with someone. Like a few weeks ago I dropped $50 on candles and such, and we lit candles and talked to spirits and at one point there was a syncronicity event where a brush of sage spontaneously burst into flame as we called a spirit to come join us, and it was strange enough that that night she and I did some very very werid things in response to the messages that nature sent us that night.

But anyways, a wizard cannot simply supply all the components to cast spells and refill those components and be expected not to charge anything for the services he offers. There are some nice people in town who will give people herbs that they need to cure diseases for free, out of concern for their neighbors, but anyways in those communities people are usually magic friendly and do things like leave a saucer of milk out for the gnomes or other little ones.
Good lord I could build a house of your posts, it's just a series of huge walls. It's kind of awesome to know there clearly isn't a maximum post size.
 

CaptainMarvelous

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May 9, 2012
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Thorvan said:
Okay, as an actual Wiccan (Or Witch, I take either one) who ACTUALLY knows a few things on the topic, let me make a potentially pointless attempt to clear things up; I'm not the most knowledgeable on the topic, but I feel it my duty to clear some things up.

First of all, Mythrandia is being hilarious.

Being a Witch/Wizard/Druid etc. Is actually a legitimate, fairly old religion, you probably know it as paganism, and was actually one of the more predominate western European religions; We're pretty sure, it's a little hard to tell considering that the Catholic church kinda rolled in and destroyed every trace of it. What bits did survive eventually came into the US in the mid-50s as Wiccanism or Paganism and has been a growing religion ever since. There's probably a few covens around where you live, you can usually google it. Like all faiths, please try to treat it with a baseline of respect.
I actually looked into this a little at Uni and I can add, it wasn't one religion of wizards/druids/what-not, there were bucket loads in England alone of different stuff like Tree Language, Druids doing stuff, Runes from the Vikings, Candle Magic, Dowsing, they're all from different 'religions' if you want to phrase it like that. Paganism isn't 'sactly an old religion as much as a label on a type, like Christianity sub-divides into Catholicism and Mormons but with a bit more sub-division than that (Lugh and Baldur might symbolise the same thing but they were vastly different in terms of the beliefs and how they worshipped) so... yeah. Sorry, just adding more context to it o.o-b.
 

Doclector

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Aug 22, 2009
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RedEyesBlackGamer said:
Misleading title. I thought they banned the sell of Magic cards.
That moment when you begin to think that the escapist is becoming a better place for funny GIFs than Senor gif.

So...this. And yet there's still a "wiccan" shop in my uni's town. Quite a few who "practice" it too. I'm not gonna tell people what to do, but it's probably for the best that people can't attempt to buy werewolf spells on ebay.

Although, the internet has probably been robbed of some hilarity this day.

EDIT: Goddammit, why did they have to move the quote button to the top of posts instead of the bottom? This kinda shit has happened far, far too much.