Escape to the Movies: The Twilight Saga: Eclipse

Jandau

Smug Platypus
Dec 19, 2008
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Great review. I'm just wondering are we also getting the regular friday EttM as well? Because that would be awesome!
 

Sir Kemper

Elite Member
Jan 21, 2010
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What happende to the good old day's of shclock, where the only thing remotly scary was it's horribad wrighting(oh, Wait...), and messegless violence.
 

Canadamus Prime

Robot in Disguise
Jun 17, 2009
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You know Bob, I'm trying to get all the Twilight haters on this forum to shut up because I'm sick and tired of hearing about it and you're not helping!!
 

Ironic Pirate

New member
May 21, 2009
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Actually, that one ninja flip over the wolf was kinda cool looking, in a "Well let's hope the douchebag gets ripped apart eventually" way.

And thank you Bob, for ripping this movie to shit.
 

lesterley

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Jul 25, 2008
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Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU!

As probably the only WOMAN over the age of 40 who reads the Escapist, I could not agree more with Bob's assessment of the Twilight series.

I want to puke whenever I think of the underlying anti-feminist messages these films are instilling in young women. I have to go back and watch old episodes of "Buffy" to dull the pain.

Leslee
 

Tdc2182

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May 21, 2009
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You said Fairly decent movie, 30 days of Night. I think that movie was well beyond fairly decent.

And WTF is this director doing with Twilight? I am so cool and all that and don't really give two shits about the series, but what the hell? He should be doing something else, like a Dresden Files movie.
 

HK_01

New member
Jun 1, 2009
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The Cheezy One said:
this film has ruined my birthday
im usually excited to see the words 30th june, but not on thaty poster
Happy birthday!

OT: I thought these movies were highly successful? If so, then why on earth does the CGI suck so bad?
 

Unhappy Crow

New member
Mar 14, 2010
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I feel bad for MovieBob having to review these Twilight movies.

I also found that scene with the wolves attacking seem rather weird looking.
 

MowDownJoe

New member
Apr 8, 2009
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Vrach said:
ciortas1 said:
And you know what's the most terrifying thing about this? I just checked out Metacritic. The Twilight "Saga": Eclipse has an average rating of
[HEADING=1]58.[/HEADING]​
Fifty-fucking-eight.

What little hope I had left in the majority of movie critics is now lost forever.
You do of course realise that 98% of things between 50 and 60 there is marked as pure shit? Reviewers that have a 1-100 thing very rarely give a below 50 rating. Especially to something like this. To translate a 58 for you, it means "it will appeal to a number of people but it's still shit".
Exactly why I prefer Rotten Tomatoes to MetaCritic, and wish they compiled game reviews like they did movie reviews. Although this movie's getting a 50% on RottenTomatoes, though.

Anyway, seeing as they posted this on the same day as ZP, it strikes me as odd that they make MovieBob censor himself, but Yahtzee can say whatever the hell he wants.
Ahh, well... I never cared about the Twilight books, but for some strange reason, my mother loves them. She even made me pick her up a copy of one of them. I had never heard of Twilight until then, but the moment I saw the book under a sign reading "Vampire Romance", I just shook my head. Maybe she should watch this... it might beat into her head why she should stop. Hell, she didn't even like the movies, saying the actors don't even try. (Why would an actor who hates their role try?)
 

Tarakos

New member
May 21, 2009
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I hope you're still reviewing the REAL Avatar (The Last Airbender) this week, and this was just a bonus episode where you pissed all over the Twilight Series (again). Still, I completely agree w/ you about this series. Even the author has stated she's sick of Twilight, but they'll definately make a few more movies, so I feel sorry for ya.
 

Not G. Ivingname

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Nov 18, 2009
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Arkhangelsk said:
Not G. Ivingname said:
Arkhangelsk said:
Not G. Ivingname said:
Wow, Twilight has done the impossible for being a scary "horror" (it isn't by any means, but is technically listed as such) movie, not for the monsters (though it is scary how they made A GIANT BATTLE BETWEEN WEREWOLFS AND VAMPIRES A HUG FEST), not for trying to break us menatly with its imagery, but for the message is trying to hammer into our brains.

I don't believe that video games cause violence. I don't believe that gay people can't be good parents, teachers, or anything else. But Twilight? It is one of those things that has the power to change the thinking of its target audiance, the 14 year olds that are just hitting puberty, but still have childhood memories of Prince Charming. It is only going down hill from here folks... you know what is are two things that are going to happen in the next movie?

One, (this is minor enough to be cut from the movie, but you know how many girls have read the books?) a girlfriend is going to get ripped to shreds by her werewolf boy friend, but stay with him because, I am not kidding here, "he lost control, but still knows he loves her."

Two, Belle is going to get pergnet with Edward's child and is going to decide to keep it, EVEN THOUGH HE RAN OFF AGAIN AND THE BABY HAS A HIGH CHANCE OF KILLING HER ON DELIVERY!

Can somebody honestly tell me that they want their child to read this? Or watch this?
I'm getting the message about what Stephanie Meyer's political views are.
What? The political view of Bizzaro Loony land?
More like implicit pro-life views.
Oh, that explains a lot. :p
 

DC_Josh

Harmonica God
Oct 9, 2008
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lesterley said:
Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU!

As probably the only WOMAN over the age of 40 who reads the Escapist, I could not agree more with Bob's assessment of the Twilight series.

I want to puke whenever I think of the underlying anti-feminist messages these films are instilling in young women. I have to go back and watch old episodes of "Buffy" to dull the pain.

Leslee
Please, write your own book series- include the words "Vampires", "Love Triangles" and "Messages". They will probably publish without reading and you can try and inject some sense into the younger generation.

*

To be honest, i've always thought that most young girls dream of marriage, so I can't quite understand the logic of people saying that they are surprised/appalled when the subject comes up. Now I dislike and defy the idea of early marriage, but not at the expense of mistaking youthful girlish fantasies for an actual desire to tie the knot.
 

Solusumbra

New member
Apr 23, 2010
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i hate it because its rabid fans imbue it with virtues it does not have.

read this: http://movies.yahoo.com/feature/movie-talk-twilight-fans-vampire-addiction-affecting-relationships.html and youll see what i mean.

were it not for this kinda shit, i would simply be disinterested or even slightly amused(in the way that a man is ever amused by a total chick flick).

i agree with everything movie bob has ever said, with an added helping of THIS SUCKS!
 

FinalHeart95

New member
Jun 29, 2009
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Speaking of marrying early, you know how the series ends, right?

Edward gets Bella pregnant. The baby starts basically killing Bella (the message of abstinence comes to mind here) and Edward has to TURN BELLA INTO A VAMPIRE to save her. He does, baby comes out, and here's where the marrying early thing comes into play.

Jacob claims the baby as his mate.

Now, not only does this not really make sense, seeing as Jacob is some weird werewolf thing and the baby is a vampire, but it's really fucking creepy.
 

Assassin Xaero

New member
Jul 23, 2008
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You know, I have to admit that the ideas behind twilight, like he explained in the beginning, are pretty good, but yeah... he sums it up... Frisbee was awesome too.