Goth Mercenaries

[Singularly Datarific]

Personally, TF2 was the only game I ever did online for quite a while, then my brother moved out, and I had no PC to play it on...
Yahtzee has a good point about it, though, all the new weapons might end up bogging it down. I still say to bring more levels, etc., it keeps things interesting, and it's almost like a TV series, with new episodes and ideas every now and then. But to keep with that analogy, if they ever add more characters or replace stuff without us knowing, I'm ditching that game ASAP.

 

[L4Y Duke]

That's a real pity there about the Team Fortress 2 thing Yahtzee.

Because, I'm pretty sure the Spy's Trilby hat was especially designed and released to make the Spy look a lot like Trilby does in Art of Theft.

 

[-BloodRush-]

So Borderlands is mediocre because it doesn't give you the opportunity to show off what a non-conformist loner you are? Sounding more like a precious brat than a game reviewer here, regardless of how many people agree with you.

well if you put it that way. lol

OT: when i used to play wow i was the same way. i gave my rogue a backround as a brooding loner who sometimes has to partner up with others to take down a tyrant. it was a fun time because i only had two consistent friends and me and them worked together real well. once i got to level 70 (this was before wrath of the lich king) there was nothing else i felt i needed to do, and thus i beat the game in my head.

I'm sure that role playing in the presence of others is what part of what makes WoW so satisfying for people, but the way he describes it he only wants those people around so he can use them for his own ends and then ignore them. I doubt they see him as a 'mercenary', more likely as the hundred-millionth anonymous douche they've had tag along for a random quest. If he's going to evaluate the game he should base his opinion on the game's merits and content, not on the affectations he brings to the experience. I mean, is it annoying that New Haven is populated with wax sculptures rather than reactive characters? Yes, for sure. But if you plan on disregarding those people and being completely apathetic to them, then what's the loss? A social game should be so for the sake of social players, IE you and your two friends, not for the sake of anti-social behavior.

i agree. *marveled at understanding on the internet instead of random debate*

 

[SFR]

Apparently Yatzee doesn't realize that Valve does the TF2 updates to keep people playing throughout the years. Also, the weapons are really cool and not too hard to master/get, so... I think you need to man up, Yatzee, and play a little.

And don't be dissin' da hats! Don't you wanna look sweat chillin' with your ten gallon? Viking helmet? RUBBER CHICKEN!?!?!? They definitely don't hinder the humor/style, is what I'm trying to say.

Oh, also, the spy can get a Fedora, so... why aren't you playing TF2 for that reason alone!?

 

[FoolKiller]

"I don't just want to play alone; I want to play alone with other people around"

I agree. This is because I want the atmosphere and not just the activity. It's why I go to a bar and have a few drinks alone instead of drinking alone at home.

 

[Superfly CJ]

Apparently Yatzee doesn't realize that Valve does the TF2 updates to keep people playing throughout the years. Also, the weapons are really cool and not too hard to master/get, so... I think you need to man up, Yatzee, and play a little.

And don't be dissin' da hats! Don't you wanna look sweat chillin' with your ten gallon? Viking helmet? RUBBER CHICKEN!?!?!? They definitely don't hinder the humor/style, is what I'm trying to say.

Oh, also, the spy can get a Fedora, so... why aren't you playing TF2 for that reason alone!?

Actually, me and a large portion of my friends have stopped playing because of the updates.

As it originally was, TF2 was a pure, perfectly balanced team shooter. Anyone could pick it up and understand it, but only the select few could master it. You know, like all good multiplayer games.

...but the game is nowhere near as balanced nowadays, because in introducing so much new content, Valve threw a laser beam into a perfectly functional game of rock, paper, scissors. Sometimes you need to realise when the going is good and leave it be.

 

[ACHVDragon]

Another game that brings the characters down to the main 3:

Soldier: Fighter
Siren:: Magic user
Berserker: Scout, but with a powerful 'shield' (think about it)

Sniper just seems to be the 'too easy' guy. Especially in multiplayer. You know what i mean, they're the pricks that steal all the kills. In single player just be farrrr away and shoot Jason Vorhees until his head explodes.

Don't u wish they could create something new, maybe mix them up? Whatever.

Totally agree on the "playing alone with other people" thing

 

[SomeUnregPunk]

I didn't want Yahtzee to do this game because just like all the fan boys on the gearbox forums, we know the story and the single-player experience sucks. The only reason to have him to review this game is because you want to see him try to rip into it better than the guys/gals over at the gearbox forums. I'm sad to see that he did a poor job of that.

I would rather want to see a review of "Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War II." If he can't do that then maybe he can do the new installment "Chaos Rising" The single player experience in that game is so completely different from the multi-player element that actually having him review it would have merit.

 

[FretfulGnome]

I know this is probably going to sound weird, but I can't believe how much we have in common Yahtzee. That sounds a little gay, I know.

 

[Paulrus_Keaton]

Note: Even though Yahtzee is actually Anglo-Australian, he reminds me of the Sniper.

'Meet the Sniper'

"I have to admit that being a Sniper is an excellent job for a person like me. In a world where every little job and task needs to be simplified to the point where even a stupid tit who has switched the places of his brains and his breakfast and wouldn't need to worry about suing the company for sexual harrassment on the benchpress, it's nice to know that there is at least some kind of work that would pose a fair amount of challenge. Also it allows me to work outdoors instead of inside in front of a computer screen burning images of Windows Movie Maker into the back of my corneas. Though while it wouldn't give me the same amount of medical insurance and disposable income, it'll at least put food on the table. Why? Because at the end of the day as long as there are two left on this planet, well three if you count myself though I wish to not being associated with such a filthy breed, someone is going to want someone dead.
This is because the number one enemy of a typical human being other than bears, sharks, and the mutants in front of a mall during a PS3 midnight release, are other human beings.

It's not all that pleasant though. Your back being turned at all times leaves you vulnerable to all sorts of hazards that clearly were not consitered when the first caveman decided to stand in hiding, chucking pebbles at various carnivorous reptiles and Mesozoic bowlers. If you don't pay attention you'll be atatcked by the obese, Nazis, rednecks, crazies, the Bear Jew, the French, Paul Hogan, and the gimp from 'Pulp Fiction'. Also, my parents refuse to talk to me anymore; probably because I told them that I shot Paul Hogan.

Which leads me to a lack of needed feelings. Personally, having no feelings removes a large weight off my shoulders because when my occupation requires that I shoot some pissant from across an industrial park I don't need to take the time to wonder why there were dicking about in the first place: I need to focus on reloading or pissing in a jar or if I just pissed into a perfectly good jar of Branston Pickle. Here's a thought: fuck feelings! The only people who have feelings are people with large vaginas or the people who cave their skulls with golfing trophies. Professionals don't need such things.

What professionals, the kind who live in a vans and snipe the horizonially challenged of course, need are standards. And those standards are to be polite. be efficent and have a plan. Hmm. But that's probably bullshit because throwing urine isn't polite, there's no remarkable effienciecy in shooting some bald bastard who prefers eating on the job, and the only plan I seem to have is to kill everyone that come in contact with me. Not that it's hard, the only people who come to me are fanboys who decide to bug me at Starbucks and they don't usually walk away from me unless they're dead or have their Imp plushes shoved up their arse."

....bleh. I should've went to bed an hour ago.

 

[Twinmill5000]

I loved Borderlands, but that was probably because I didn't have to go through the crap that got me to quit WoW. That... and in WoW there's no aiming even if it's spell overload and actually fun like that.

Still, I loved it. I mean, yeah, I quit recently, but do plan to pick it up again soon. I mean, it took what I liked about WoW (the guns, the stats, the exp, the loot (see: guns) and mages) and combined it into something that wasn't entirely gear dependent. I could care less about the glued on crap, because I was just having too much fun running around as an overpowered Gunslinger doing gunslinger things. That is... until I beat it and done enough random runs to gouge my eyes out. I'll still play it again... I mean it's just one of those games. Kinda like S4. Sure, you have probably 1 or two small maps you'd actually play and the community can troll you to hell if you're not perfect, or mention the word love, but the game's just fucking fun.

Anyway, I guess I'm a lone wolf too. Sure in WoW I had a guild but I know in other games the second I got guilded I quit the game forever. In that case, Aika's the perfect Lone Wolf game. The solo play is awesome in it. Though... I do admit that once someone's grouped with me I'll stick with them for a while, and I'll help someone when they need it, gladly. I recommend it when the open beta releases to anyone who isn't in a group 24/7 and likes mages and spells and elves... maybe not elves and swords and gunslingers and Korean character art and whatnot.

 

[Andronicus]

Hehe, I love the idea of people playing WoW with Yahtzee.

Group of players in WoW finishing of a dungeon.
supapwna71: Hey, this new guy doesn't talk much huh?
MrDildo: What, [Yahtzee's tag, hiding his true identity]? Nah, he hasn't said a word. Fights well though.
GenericRPGName: yeh wtf hes soooo borin well gank him afta lol
supapwna71: Well, we're coming up to the end here.
[Yahtzee]: So long guys. Check out my video later, Zero Punctuation on the Escapist.
Yahtzee runs off. Pause.
supapwna71: Dude. Were we just playing WoW with Yahtzee?
GenericRPGName: Fuk. We shulda gankd him.

I don't play WoW, so I don't know how people speak, or if they have names like that. I just loved the idea.

 

[Straz]

So Borderlands is mediocre because it doesn't give you the opportunity to show off what a non-conformist loner you are? Sounding more like a precious brat than a game reviewer here, regardless of how many people agree with you.

well if you put it that way. lol

OT: when i used to play wow i was the same way. i gave my rogue a backround as a brooding loner who sometimes has to partner up with others to take down a tyrant. it was a fun time because i only had two consistent friends and me and them worked together real well. once i got to level 70 (this was before wrath of the lich king) there was nothing else i felt i needed to do, and thus i beat the game in my head.

I'm sure that role playing in the presence of others is what part of what makes WoW so satisfying for people, but the way he describes it he only wants those people around so he can use them for his own ends and then ignore them. I doubt they see him as a 'mercenary', more likely as the hundred-millionth anonymous douche they've had tag along for a random quest. If he's going to evaluate the game he should base his opinion on the game's merits and content, not on the affectations he brings to the experience. I mean, is it annoying that New Haven is populated with wax sculptures rather than reactive characters? Yes, for sure. But if you plan on disregarding those people and being completely apathetic to them, then what's the loss? A social game should be so for the sake of social players, IE you and your two friends, not for the sake of anti-social behavior.

He said that WoW was mediocre.
What of it?

Seriously, I'm not saying that it's a good game, but an MMO with actual immersive quests is Runescape.
Say what you will about it, but I will defend its quests to the very end.

 

[Straz]

I didn't want Yahtzee to do this game because just like all the fan boys on the gearbox forums, we know the story and the single-player experience sucks. The only reason to have him to review this game is because you want to see him try to rip into it better than the guys/gals over at the gearbox forums. I'm sad to see that he did a poor job of that.

I would rather want to see a review of "Warhammer 40,000: Dawn of War II." If he can't do that then maybe he can do the new installment "Chaos Rising" The single player experience in that game is so completely different from the multi-player element that actually having him review it would have merit.

I think Yahtzee has said it before.
He is useless at RTSs.
I had another comment on that topic, but I forgot it.

 

[HotPotatoXD]

I actually agree with most of everything he says on his reviews, i might not break down the game as much, but things he likes or dislikes go hand and hand with my opinion... so i find it odd how people disagree with him alot

 

[ShinningDesertEagle]

I liked this article and found it to be a good read.

However, I have to disagree with his opinion that a game must stand on its own as a single-player. You can review a game's online play without making it a review of who well your friends play so long as you are objective. By that logic reviewing the quality of a single-player game is only telling how well you play. "And that's bullshit."

 

[David Bray]

I can't do MMOs either because a more forthcoming minority of the gaming community are dicks and ruin the play experience. A game has to be reviewed on its single player unless it's a pure multiplayer in which case it need not exist.
I don't mind online co-op but anymore and the chance of annoying individuals increases.

 

[blainemono]

You know, most of the times Yahtzee appears to be a smart, well-versed, thoughtful young man.

Some other times though, his writing raises questions not about his sanity per se, but rather about the origins of the alien body-snatching race that took hold of his body and is using it for goals unknown but most certainly nefarious.

More to the point, the reasoning beyond the whole "Valve is butchering Team Fortress" thing seems a bit weird to me.

I've been following TF for some time now. Make no mistake - I suck at it pretty badly. Still, getting steamrolled all the time doesn't detract from the moderate amount of fun I get - because, well, because TF is a great game.

Now, updates. They are making the game more hectic and less predictable, certainly. But they also add greatly to the novelty of the game, giving a sense of joy in discovery or whatever. Saying that they overcomplicate the game and make it easier for leet kidz to pwn you is both dumb and not true - TF is not overcompicated even now which, I think, is a great achievement on Valve's behalf, and leet kidz will pwn you anyways, updates or not - such is their nature.

I have to agree though, TF blog is hilarious on its own, no actual gameplay is needed to have some fun.

Still, patricidal Victorian fuckhead? Valve? Seriously?

 

[crotalidian]

There was a painter in the 19th century called Richard Dadd, who famously went insane, murdered his father and spent the rest of his life in an asylum. There he created his most famous painting, "The Fairy Feller's Master-Stroke," which he worked on for nine years. It's absolutely covered in minute obsessive detail, and bits of it were re-done so many times that the layers of paint extrude unevenly from the canvas. And he still considered it an unfinished work. So the point I'm getting at is that Valve's work with Team Fortress 2 reminds me of a patricidal Victorian fuckhead.

adn that painting also became the focus of a book from one of my favourite funny authors around

The Witches of Chiswick by Robert Rankin. Hilarious, you guys should check out some of his other works too notably the Armageddon:the Musical (and sequels) and the Brentford trilogy (starting with the Antipope)

 

[Carnagath]

I agree somewhat with the pointless nature of socializing in MMORPG's. 90% of the people you meet are assholes and make your blood boil. My default playstyle is "the goth" as well, when I enter such a game as a stranger among strangers. I have however experienced the joy of high-end raiding in WoW (and by high-end I mean world top 20), and I can say that it is a completely different experience. Maybe my guild was just full of nice people, but there was no hysteria, no drama, no assholes... just a tight team of people who took their performance in the game very very seriously (but always with a sense of humour when mistakes happened). So, if you have the time and the energy it takes to play at a very high, competitive level, there is just no better feeling to my experience than socializing with a tight group of like-minded people. The lone wolf approach though is boring and pointless, which is why I have not touched an MMO since and probably never will.