How do you break up with someone?

thiosk

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Sep 18, 2008
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Suggest a threesome with your new interest.

In most cases, that relationship is ovarzzzz.
 

Rednog

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Nov 3, 2008
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I do it with class, I write a simple letter "Our relationship, it is over" and sign my name and mail it to them.
 

xXAsherahXx

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Apr 8, 2010
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My routine is to just wait until I am broken up with. I'm not a very tolerable person in large doses so it isn't really a problem losing women when I want them gone.
 

srm79

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Jan 31, 2010
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Face to face. Always face to face. I don't know about long distance, I've always been with girlfriends who I didn't meet online who live half a continent away so I've never had to consider doing it by text or IM or anything like that.

I 100% agree with the sentiment that if you have the option to do it face to face, then you need to man the fuck up and forget that text bullshit. That's about the cruelest way to do it. If you're that emotionally immature that you can't handle the shitty bits, you shouldn't be fucking about with peoples feelings and getting into relationships in the first place.
 

MrMixelPixel

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Jul 7, 2010
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I've never done it... xP

I've never asked anyone out, nor have I broken up with anyone.

While I've only dated twice, I usually just get bored and start ignoring my girlfriend. Stop texting, avoiding them at school, stuff like that. Both times, they broke up with me... even though that was sort of my goal.

So when I want to break up with someone... I make myself really undesirable... I suppose.
 

V TheSystem V

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Sep 11, 2009
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TheLoneBeet said:
I generally don't break up with people. Even if I think I should or I see the relationship coming to a close I don't have it in me. I let them break up with me so they can feel like they've won. I know "won" isn't the right word but I just prefer it if they don't feel as bad about it.

I did the breaking once and it broke my heart when she started crying. Despite my attempts to clarify that she shouldn't feel bad and it wasn't her fault she was in tears when our conversation ended. A classmate of mine (I did this after school because it felt wrong to drive her somewhere considering how awkward the drive home would be)even came up and told me it was the nicest breakup he'd ever heard and that I shouldn't feel bad.
This. Never done the breaking because I can't hurt someone like that. I stupidly told my girlfriend at one point that I kept having the thoughts of breaking up with her, and she got so upset I died inside. I realised it was just stupid, stupid thoughts and that I still loved her, so we got through it. Was just a moment of insanity. All my exes have done the breaking up; one over MSN, the other two face to face. My last ex cried when she told me it wasn't working out, which made me feel a bit better about myself (don't know why).
 

Mr Shrike

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Aug 13, 2010
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I try to break up face-to-face. She at least deserves that much for putting up with me and my eccentrics. It's common courtesy.

Last time, however, did not go well...

I punched her. Not a good move.
 

Zero=Interrupt

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Nov 9, 2009
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You have the balls to say to their face "This isn't working, and I don't think we should date anymore." If you don't have the balls, you can do it the George Costanza way, which is to say, do something so appalling they won't want to see you again, like picking your nose, smoking, or suggesting a threesome with their mum. This is generally regarded as a sniveling, cowardly thing to do and you SHOULD NOT DO THIS.

Get a spine, for pete's sake. Just tell them.

The following is a also list of things you should NOT do:

1) break up with them by phone message
2) break up with them via text
3) steps one and/or two by any alternative medium, like Facebook, Tweet, MMORPG and so on.
4) Drive a car, at full throttle, into their house. NEVER EVER DO THIS.
5) Run at them screaming "I'm breaking up with you!" holding a chocolate/actual gun/power tool/lawn implement/etc. Or the real thing.
6) hand-write a note and mail it.
7) attach the above note to their beloved pet
8) Tell them during sex. They WILL stab you with an ice pick.
9) Break up with them during their birthday or like special occasion
10) Leave a message with their parents. THEY will stab you with an ice pick.
 

Thaa'ir

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Feb 10, 2011
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I would feel worse about it if I didn't break up face-to-face, because then I would know myself to be weak and cowardly.

So I broke up with my last boyfriend face-to-face...that was hard, but he had made his choices, and so I made mine and did what I had to do.
 

Sizzle Montyjing

Pronouns - Slam/Slammed/Slammin'
Apr 5, 2011
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Bury a pick-axe in their face.
...
WHAT!?
Oh okay then... i suppose you give the news to them slowely and kindly...
Then pepper-spray them for good measure.
 

Indignation837

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Apr 11, 2010
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Heh, funny you should mention this, I'm actually going to break up with my girlfriend in a few days myself. I've been looking for advice too and come up with these pointers:

- Do it in person. Texting is a dick move, phone call is less so, but in person is always best.

- Try to talk it out first, or at least let them know there's a problem before calling it off so it's not a complete surprise.

- Do it in a neutral, semi-public place (but not a crowded one, like a restaurant). This reduces the probability of a meltdown, but gives you a quick way out if they do.

- Make it clear that the relationship is over to prevent extended drama.

- Have plans later in the day to keep your mind off of it after the fact.
 

Lataziba

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Oct 22, 2011
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from my experience...texting a breakup doesnt work well in your favor...people say the best

way to break up is to confront them about it...doesnt work well for me lol. my last break up

didnt go to well, and it wasnt entirelly my choice either. but it had to be done
 

Naal

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Feb 24, 2009
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I always do it face to face, unless it's a long distance relationship, then by phone.

Last break up I beat him to his house before he got there, grabbed anything I had there (Clothing, shampoo, miscellaneous items) and then broke up with him when he came home.

Also, text break ups really are stupid and cowardly; It's completely juvenile.
 

Royta

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Aug 7, 2009
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Personally. I just arrange a drink with her, usually in a bar, cafe, pup where we had our first date. We talk a bit and I just give her the serious look and be honest with her.
"It isn't working out" "I just don't love you anymore" "we had a great time, but it's time for us to split ways" etc. Things like that. I'm kind of to the point, because I think they deserve that. I tell them that as well "I'm telling you this honestly, right now, because you deserve to know and not be held on a string for months".
Then I pay the bill and usually walk away. Sometimes I stay friends, but rarely.
 

game-lover

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Dec 1, 2010
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I've never been in a relationship so I've yet to break up with anyone.

So I'll say that for me, it's likely a case by case basis. I don't imagine I'd treat a relationship lightly so things would have to be bad or something or else major for me to wanna break up with somebody.
 

Yopaz

Sarcastic overlord
Jun 3, 2009
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I'll just be myself and the girl will soon come to her senses and dump me.
 

OriginalError

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May 31, 2008
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STORY TIME!

I was going out with this girl for 8 or 9 months and she was cheating on me for about the last 3 weeks. No big deal. I convinced her to get my name tattoo'd onto her, and slipped the tattoo artist an extra grand to make it a red 'A' on her back.

Then I told her I was breaking up with her.

//J.
 

TobiasMP

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Jun 9, 2010
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ALWAYS FACE TO FACE. always. This will probably sound like I'm a douchbag, because I probably am, but i have a routine. It never failed. I still have friendly contact with all my exes and some of them have even become really good friends.
The routine? So easy, everyone could think of it: take her outstide for a walk and talk. Honestly telling her that my feelings have changed. That the spark is gone and I don't think we should continue the relationship. They mostly react with a "so we are over?" or "so you're breaking up with me?"; I respond with a sincere "I'm sorry, I don't want to hurt you" and we hug.

What's really important is just being honest and doing it OUTSIDE. This makes it much easier to walk away afterwards.

I learned this thanks to a girl who broke up with me. I was honestly impressed by her honesty and I was sincerely worried she would feel guilty about it. I actually send her an email the day after; saying I understood her decision and she shouldnt feel guilty. When I use this routine, i get the same reaction from them.