Is the question, "Are you gay?" offensive?

[Puddleknock]

Been asked "are you gay?" twice in my life and both times I found the question amusing rather than offensive. If either of the people asking had been looking to pass judgement on my answer then I may have felt differently, but both times they were just curious and the question was harmless. One of the enquirers was actually quite sheepish when I said I was not gay, assuming I would be offended by the question.

 

[retyopy]

First off, this thread would've benefited from a poll. Just sayin'.

Second off, of course it isn't. That's ridiculious. It's not offensive to say "are you straight," is it? No? So it goes the other way! I can see absolutely no reason why it would be offensive.

 

[Chknboy]

The question in itself isn't offensive, it's all about how you ask it.

 

[Zeren]

I don't mind that question. I answer, "No I'm not. I am however, pansexual"

 

[CarlsonAndPeeters]

Most of the gay guys I know would rather you just ask than having you awkwardly step around the topic whenever you're around them. I'm not sure if thats true for everyone, though.

 

[game-lover]

I doubt it would be offensive if they are, in fact, gay. However, if you ask and they turn out to be straight they may take offense.

Pretty much this.

It's probably like asking if they have some kind of mental disorder. If they have one, they'd answer honestly and probably be fine. If they don't, they could be insulted because you're implying they act like it.

For straight people, it can be like you're saying they act homosexual and some probably wouldn't like that.

 

[Glademaster_v1legacy]

It could be phrased better, it is quite a personal question and it depends on how it asked so yes it can be offensive or at the very least invasive.

 

[IamQ]

No. It is a question. How can it be offensive?

Since it is a question, it gives you a choice of what to answer. If they ask something you don't want to answer, then simply say that you do not wish to answer. If they still persist, then you may be offended.

 

[GamerKT]

No. I'd be fine with getting the fact that I like the ladies out there in the open early on.

I'm a male, by the way.

 

[GamerKT]

It's all about context. If you use it as an insult of course I'm going to be offended. If you're just asking an honest question then I'll provide you with an honest answer.

How the fuck is it an insult?

 

[Madara XIII]

It is offenseive. I understand if a woman is curious, but when they ask it is like they aren't sure that I am a straight male. That means my worth is little in her reprotuctive scope. I am then worthless to her... which means I am worthless as a whole.

.....GOD DAMN DUDE!! Could you get any more abysmal with that post?

Seriously after reading that I just wanna go and have a drink now.
Btw that way of thinking isn't all that accurate. If she asks you if you're gay or not just tell her the honest truth. Damn man it shouldn't be offensive, whether you are or not.

I'm fruity as all Hell, but I don't take offense when people ask me if I'm gay. I simply tell them I'm metrosexual.
I mean big whoop if I have more hair-care products than most straight and gay guys?
So what if I know alot about make-up and fashion?
I still like women and if anything it works towards my advantage. They become a bit more open towards me .

Seriously dude, you might want to think over what you said. Because in all honesty what you just posted sounds quite offensive to some. Here's a rule in life.
Don't wear your emotions on your sleeves all the time. Whether you be gay straight or even metro or bi, take some pride in yourself and be willing to correct others nicely if they are under the assumption that you're something you're not.

[HEADING=2]Now cheer up and have a Smile[/HEADING]

 

[Madara XIII]

My response is "i'm certianly not miserable".

OH HOHOHOHO Well played good sir well played

 

[Madara XIII]

I don't mind that question. I answer, "No I'm not. I am however, pansexual"

Pansexual basically meaning Gender-Blind in attraction.

Isn't that just another term for Bi-Sexual!?!? Like as in Politically Correct Terms?
Or is there something I'm missing, like having a Sex with a Toaster or what not?

 

[Madara XIII]

My response would simple be this and this alone hehehehe

[HEADING=1]"Mmmmm Care to find out?"[/HEADING]

[HEADING=2]*Bites Lip and unbuttons shirt*


Watch the Homophobes jump back in fear of my Metrosexuality! MWAHAHAAHAHA[/HEADING]

 

[Harry Mason]

If someone is offended by that question, it is highly likely that they are either homophobic or a closeted homosexual themselves.

It may help to phrase the question "What is your sexual preference?" rather than "are you gay?"

 

[dickywebster]

Provided your not taking the piss, its a legit question, could stop all kinds of problems further down the road.
You just want to know something about someone, if thats offensive then asking anything about anyone could be seen as offensive.

 

[burningdragoon]

The question itself is not offensive. How, why, and when you ask it determines that. However, it is a personal question, and despite what a lot people seem to think, some people don't like answering personal questions in every situation, and you should use some judgement on whether or not it is okay to ask.

 

[Harry Mason]

It's all about context. If you use it as an insult of course I'm going to be offended. If you're just asking an honest question then I'll provide you with an honest answer.

How the fuck is it an insult?

It can be an insult like this...

"I like that color, it's pretty."
"What are you, GAY?!"

The honest question version goes like this...

"I was wondering, are you gay?"
"Why no. No I am not. I happen to be straight"

Very big difference in intentionality here.

 

[Takolin]

As a gay man, I don't think the question as such is offensive but it all depends on the context and how/why the question was asked.