Not wanting to go to Prom

[Kaymish]

i didn't go to my first one and regretted it for 15 seconds i went to my second one one and regretted it for the hours and hours the stupid thing seamed to drag on for at least the after party was tolerable and to this day unless some one brings it up i have totally forgotten the event it was completely pointless

 

[TIMESWORDSMAN]

I'm 19 and only just went to my first prom this year, but I'm a nerdy asocial long-haired youth and I enjoyed it.
Admittedly, the other nerds and I sort of coalesced into a pool and ended up all going somewhere to play Magic, but I count that as a success.

 

[fezgod]

I didn't go to prom and none of my friends (who all went) gave a shit. 3 months later in college...nobody gave a shit. I probably would've had a good time, but I honestly couldn't be bothered.

 

[an annoyed writer]

I didn't like the atmosphere at school, I didn't like a lot of people there, and I did not have any interest in the music there. I don't really dance, I don't drink, and I prefer my socialization to be tight and intimate. The only thing I could say I like there is the attire, and at the time if I showed up in what I like to wear I would've gotten torched on-sight. Glad to say I didn't go.

 

[Johnny Novgorod]

I went to my prom and it was OK-ish I guess, if only because I had a date. I'd just go for the memories, whhichever those are.

 

[VoidWanderer]

If you don't want to go, don't.

If anyone picks on you for being a 'loner', ignore them. It is your choice, not theirs

 

[gphjr14]

I took 2 girls to my junior prom and that cost enough to where I didn't even go to my senior prom. I really don't see the point in it to be honest.

 

[Proverbial Jon]

I have a rule in my life: If it makes me happy, do it. If it doesn't make me happy, don't do it. Simple.

The only time I will break said rule is if it borders on turning into a purely selfish act and may hurt someone. In your case however, no ones going to be personally affected by your choice.

I didn't go to my secondary school "prom" because that just isn't my scene, much like you. I did go to my college prom however, after much debate, and had a good time. It was a nice farewell to people I had spent 2 years of my life with. Although I only really agreed to go as a way of showing my then-ex girlfriend that I could still have a good time without her. It was also the first time I got drunk so that might have had an influence... Needless to say, I don't drink now.

Take from that what you will.

 

[Lieju]

I didn't go. Or the Finnish equivalent of it, anyway.
It might be it's a more formal thing here in Finland, though, and a lot of people didn't go.

My mom wanted me to go, but as I told her, I don't either dance or wear dresses, so why bother?
The only way I would have gone if my best friend (who is male) would have really wanted to go and asked me to go with him, but luckily he had no interest in it either.

 

[spartan231490]

Similarly to American High Schools, here in Britain we also have proms at the end of elementary(?)/secondary education.

For me, that date is closing in, and I don't know if I want to go, as I don't enjoy parties, I hate wearing suits/dressing up for occasions, and I would only go to spend time w/ my friends.

The counter-argument is that I'm a "boring" person/loser if I don't go, and I feel that my own family will bully me into going, as otherwise, they'll think that I'm addicted to my PC being the point of no return, also they desperately want to deny that I'm a "nerd". (Apparently, it hasn't clicked for them, or it has to do with the fact that my mum is 53, and my brother is a "Bro", except not stupid, and that most people in my home country are intolerant jackasses(Yes, I'm bitter))

So I will ask you, Escapists on whether or not I'm in the right, or if I'm just being boring.

As someone who went to prom without a date, unable to dance because of a recently torn groin muscle, who hates party music: go. You'll regret it if you don't. Even with all that, I had fun, and I am soooo glad I was convinced to go(a few friends were going stag as well). I even got asked to dance by some of the prettiest girls in the class(though, as mentioned, I had to decline).

 

[Stryc9]

If you don't want to go then don't, simple as that. I didn't go to mine when I was in high school, or pretty much any other after school activities. Though that really wasn't so much because of me not wanting to go(for the most part I didn't) and my parents telling me that since they never went to any of that shit when they were in school I didn't need to go to any of it either.

The few times that I tagged along or was peer pressured into going to such events I had a shit time and it was a long while before I fell for that crap again so...

 

[HoneyVision]

I can almost assure you now that by the time you're 25 your social persona would have completely changed, so if you're not comfortable in that kind of setting then don't go. It's really not gonna matter.
If you still feel like a "boring loser" by the time you're 25 then come back and see us. But for now, any non-academic decisions you make are almost completely irrelevant to your later years.

 

[MajorTomServo]

I went to mine junior and senior year. Both times were pretty "meh." Not worth all the money that was dumped into it by a long shot. Though to be fair, my friends and I didn't drink, smoke, or have sex, but if you're into that stuff, why bother doing it all in tuxedos and gowns?

If you don't go, you may regret it later in life. People like to romanticize it, and you might feel like you missed out. You won't, but you might feel like it...

 

[Prime_Hunter_H01]

I ended up going to prom since i had nothing to loose since my parents were paying, It was pleasant enough until I saw the girl I liked with no one to dance with, and like at my ROTC military balls, I could not bring my self to ask her to dance. Now the story there is that i met her in my freshman year and always liked her but i was to nervous to even be friendly much less ask her out. So at my ROTC military balls I tried so many times to ask her, even at the last one which was before prom. Even though i had a good enough time at it seeing friends i wish i had not gone because my fear go the better of me and I had to call for my ride home in tears. So for me it was unpleasant but not the fault of the prom itself, but to repeat what has been said if you have a lot of friends go since it will be a reasonable enough time. I am kind of lucky since i saw a lot of friendly faces since it seems that every one i met did get a good impression off of me and was social to me even though i was a huge loner.

 

[Yopaz]

I never went to any of the school functions. Turned out well, I think, considering the Principal would always come on the PA the next school day and (rightfully) complain that all the kids were a bunch of shits because they literally could not keep from getting drunk and having sex on the dance floor. And under the stairs. And in the bathrooms. And out by the baseball diamond. And in the back of the bus.

O.O I can't imagine the reaction of my old high school if they caught people having sex. It would have probably been expulsion without any possibility to appeal. (but than again, it was a catholic high school)

In my sister's class a couple had sex in the bathroom (with very thin walls) during a normal school day once. Nothing happened except that they got a request not to do that again. I don't think it's mentioned anywhere in the school regulations that it's forbidden because it should be fairly obvious not to do so, but that means they can't punish them since there aren't any offciial rules against it.

Now my culture is probably very different than yours, so that's probaly the reason.


OT: Mine has always been mandatory so I have went to all "promish" events and I have been part of preparing two of them. Most of them were quite boring, but Iwould recommend that you go though. It's an easy way to avoid being bothered by people for one and it might turn out better than expected.

 

[locoartero]

I didn't go to mine and I'm pretty happy I didn't, I know I would have been bored out of my skull and a downer to everyone else so I didn't go. I am much happier just hanging out with a few of the guys and relaxing, fuck social conventions do what you want to do

This. I made friends with two of the teachers, who were just a few years older, rather than with the other kids. So I met them outside as it finished and we all went for a meal. It was cool. But I did not attend the event. Fuck that.

 

[Not Matt]

didn't go to mine, don't really mind either. my friend who was there showed me some pictures and it looked about as fun as 150 people standing around listening to classical music can be.

i did go with a yonger friend to her prom and it was pretty...crap. but then again i didn't know anybody there so i just ended up trying to beat out the time until i could leave.

 

[Idlemessiah]

I wish I never went to my secondary school prom. I ended up leaving early anyway cause I was bored shitless.

Now college and university proms/balls are different, since you're surround by people you actually like and there is booze.
My end of uni ball was a blast.

 

[Mr F.]

Similarly to American High Schools, here in Britain we also have proms at the end of elementary(?)/secondary education.

For me, that date is closing in, and I don't know if I want to go, as I don't enjoy parties, I hate wearing suits/dressing up for occasions, and I would only go to spend time w/ my friends.

The counter-argument is that I'm a "boring" person/loser if I don't go, and I feel that my own family will bully me into going, as otherwise, they'll think that I'm addicted to my PC being the point of no return, also they desperately want to deny that I'm a "nerd". (Apparently, it hasn't clicked for them, or it has to do with the fact that my mum is 53, and my brother is a "Bro", except not stupid, and that most people in my home country are intolerant jackasses(Yes, I'm bitter))

So I will ask you, Escapists on whether or not I'm in the right, or if I'm just being boring.

Just go. Its usually more fun then you will give it credit for. I hated everyone and everything about my old school back when I was that young and I jsut went and I still enjoyed myself, even if not that much. Its worth it, its always good to be seen, its always good to try.

Uh, nothing else to say really. You are both in the right and just being boring. You stated your friends were going, so go and chill out with them. Being bored with friends beats being bored by yourself. And if its a choice between prom or sitting by yourself playing games and you choose the latter, you are doing it wrong.

Take it from someone who used to be a super-duper-uber-geek who ruined his life when he was 14 - 17 by choosing WoW over everything. Gaming too much is bad. Social situations, even ones you do not enjoy, are good. Get used to doing things you do not like and good things will eventually happen.

 

[Sectan]

I didn't go to my prom. Nobody to go with, plus it just didn't appeal to me. If one of your friends happens to not be going either just do something with them. Nothing wrong at all with not wanting to go to a prom. Costs a lot of money and you go through a lot of trouble for a strict and chaperoned party.